Aboutvanessaoz Expertise I love helping people and and some may say that I am a very chatting and friendly person. I can offer advice to people who are in long distance or a different cultural online relationship as I have experienced both. I know how hard it can be and how heartbreaking it can be but I also know how rewarding they can be.
i live in australia so depending where you live my time frame for answering may differ but i will try to answer within 24 hours of receiving your question.
Experience I have experience with online relationships and having friends who are in one or have had them, I know the highs and lows that can come from being in one, especially long distance. I have been online for five years and met many people from different cultures.
Firstly I would like to say thanks for your kindess to read my question.
I'm a 26 year-old asian girl. Now i'm having a lot of trouble with my current relationship and my online love too.
I have a boyfriend in my native country for 8 years. We are neighbour and we fell in love at high school. I finished the University and have worked for 3 years. After that, my boyfriend finished his university and just now he has got a job. During 8 years, he didn't introduce me to his family once. He was really scared if his family saw us in the street. I was upset about that but i thought he didn't have a job and maybe he felt unconfident. And I kept waiting... But it was hopeless.....I loved him very much and he has taken care of me perfectly as what i like.
Then I felt very lonely and I started studying different languages, and Spanish is one of my interest. I met a guy in mexico in December last year and We have studied together and We fell in love. Meanwhile my current boyfriend and I are still together but we go out less and i love him less and less....
This year in April, i said goodbye to my native boyfriend and after that he has done a lot of things, he said he was wrong and he realized his mistake and he introduced me to his parents and he talked about our marriage.....I was confused because i wanted to stop but i still love him. I think so......Then We come back but now i'm really cold to him and he knows but he still tries to solve the trouble.
About my mexican boyfriend, we spend time together most of our free time chatting and he has bought the ticket to visit me in August. All things are very smooth between us. We talk about our marriage next year and our future.....what i will do in mexico and what he will behave with me.....
Sometimes I feel very sad about my former relationship but now my native boyfriend is very good to me and repents..but my mexican boyfriend is going to visit me...and if it works between us he will marry me....
Sorry for the long description. Now they are my questions.
1. My Mexican bf will stay in my country for 1 week and he talks that just 1 week and then we will decide for marriage next year. Is it enough to decide the marriage for 1 week meeting?? The different culture, language and background will effect on our relationship?. (uptil now we have the common interests and we have adjusted many different tastes in discussion)
2. Should I stop dreaming about the online relationship and come back to my native bf and give him one more chance because he is very kind and loves me very much now.
I'm waiting for your answer with highly appreciation
emily
Answer hi emily,
thanks for your email, i will try to help you with your questions.
after reading your email its obvious that your native bf didnt know what he had till he almost lost you. its hard to predict the future but whats important is who makes YOU happy.
i can advise you but i dont know these two men like you do and ultimately the decision has to be yours.
you say that your native bf loves you very much now, is that because is that because he is scared about losing you to someone else.
there will be difficulties with language and cultural differences but if you both love each other then these can be overcome in time. whether you can decide in one week about marriage, again, it can happen if you both want it to happen.
i really wish i could offer the answers you seek but like i said earlier, only you know who suits you better and its you that has to be happy.
try writing a list of pros and cons for both guys. sometimes seeing it in writing makes decisions much clearer...
