Aboutvanessaoz Expertise I love helping people and and some may say that I am a very chatting and friendly person. I can offer advice to people who are in long distance or a different cultural online relationship as I have experienced both. I know how hard it can be and how heartbreaking it can be but I also know how rewarding they can be.
i live in australia so depending where you live my time frame for answering may differ but i will try to answer within 24 hours of receiving your question.
Experience I have experience with online relationships and having friends who are in one or have had them, I know the highs and lows that can come from being in one, especially long distance. I have been online for five years and met many people from different cultures.
My gf and I have been together for about two months. I met her in a video game and I thought she was the perfect girl. I loved everything about her. We developed strong feelings for each other very quickly. Within the first week we said we loved each other. Kind of sudden but we are young( I'm 17 shes 18).
We broke up 4 times within the two months we have been together. We always seemed to get back together within a day though. I broke up with her twice and she broke up with me twice. The last time she broke up with my its like the love I had for in the beginning was gone. In the beginning i was like lost in her. I was like a leech sucking on her and was really attached. However when we broke up the 3rd time. She broke up with me because of the distance and didn't think she could do it. Within an hour she wanted to be with me again.
We plan on meeting in june of 2010 but thats 9 months away and who knows what can happen. We don't talk on IM anymore just phone and a couple text messages a day. We do our best to talk everyday but its different for me. In the beginning I was looking forward to her phone call and I was so happy to talk with her and text her. Now sometimes I purposely ignore her texts or phone calls. Or just put my phone or silent so I don't hear it. I still care though and reply back eventually but just not at that second anymore.
I care for her but its not in that passionate way of love like I once had. I want to make the relationship work until june when we meet but at the same time. I look at the situation and say wow. 9 months is a pretty long time to wait for someone. We are both good looking and I might just be better off with someone closer to me than investing my heart and soul into a girl that might not even come my way but through voice.
I've tried to break up with her for the last time but she begged and cried for me over the phone not to so I stopped and told her one last time.
I told her maybe we should put our relationship on hold and we are both around guys and girls a lot so maybe we should see how that goes. She told me "whatever you want just let me know". I know shes expecting me to break up with her. I'm expecting it too but I just can't for some reason. Maybe I'm trying to keep hope alive.
Answer hi lloyd,
thanks for your email, sorry i was a bit late replying back to you.
you may be young but you sound very mature. you are right, i feel its best if you both go out with people that live near by you at your age.
having a relationship online is pretty hard to maintain because there comes a time where you want to be with this person and talking and texting are not enough.
in the beginning its all nice getting to know one another and what you perceive as love is actually infatuation with one another. takes time to fall in love with that special person. i think you realize that.
im dont feel its a good idea to keep this going until you meet, by that time you will be emotionally drained and wont appreciate the time you have with her.
you have to be strong if you want to break this off, maybe just a friendship with no strings attached. suggest to her that you are not ready yet and would like to keep her as a friends. maybe over time as you both mature, things may go further.
