Expert: Ovadiah ben Avraham - 3/14/2007

Question
Hello Rav2B-

Can you help me understand "why" in Judaism, couples whether (married)or otherwise are not allowed to show affection for one another in public, even so much as holding hands? Is this derived from the Torah?  Wondering what the Halachah says about this.


Answer
Thank you for the kind question. Modesty is a key element of Judaism and its expression becomes more obvious the more 'orthodox' one is. The scenario you describe is only ascribed to by the more orthodox amongst us, although you won't generally see extreme forms of public affection (ie necking) in even the most liberal Jewish couple. Simply stated, Halakhah requires that we dress and act modestly as good G-d fearing people should. An additional reason in the separation between a man and a woman during the latter's monthly period. Once again, the more orthodox, the more stringent the rules. It would be embarrassing to the woman if they were seen holding hands, kissing, etc., all but during the wife's menstruation, in which case, her 'infirmity' would be obvious. Hope this helps. Shalom!