Pagan/Wiccan Religion/Alcoholic love

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Jim and I
Jim and I  
QUESTION: The love of my life has found me and of course he is an alcoholic! I know why. He was married. 2 weeks after the wedding she was diagnosed with cancer. After 2 years she died. Along with his grief he has guilt, because he blew her off and went fishing the day she died. He was not with her. He was not a drunk then. After she died 12 yrs ago, he turned to beer. Now we found each other. He will not even discuss his drinking. He says he has no problem. he drinks 12-24 beers every day. Now he has pushed me away because I tried to get him to reflect and feel and acknowledge. I am in Colorado he is in the Marshall Islands at least until July. Please help me help him admit he has a problem and get help. I do not want him to die! I love him more than I have ever loved another. I know I cant cast a spell to cure him. How can I help him?

ANSWER: Oh, this is a horrible place to be. Being in the Marshalls isn't going to help.  We love to drink out here in the Pacific!!

Nothing will happen until he acknowledges the problem.  How is his health?  Does he see a docter at least annually?  He may have a fear of doctors because of his wife.  But if he did get a diagnosis of liver problems or high blood pressure, etc, it might help him see the disadvantages of harming his body.  
I would recommend general spells of healing - the mind and the body.  Spells for self confidence, cleansing the soul, inner peace, I will have to see if I have any you can use, but there are lots of general peace and wellness spells out there.  
If you don't hear from me within several days, write back...my to do list is really long.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hello,
You asked me about his health. He has High blood pressure and sleep apnea. He has memory issues that he blows off he is in Full denial of any drinking problem. He tries to play games with the results of his doctor visits. They have told him to stop drinking, His liver enzymes are a mess! His own father died of liver failure.
As a matter of fact, due to my constant concern, he broke up with me! He told me ". it seems that we obviously have different views as to where we are in our lives " and then on the phone he told me he is just not in love with me. 5 days before that we were planning to spend the summer together. His sister feel I scared him and it was easier to get rid of me than beer! I do love him with all my heart. If there is any hope at all of this getting better. It all lies in magic. I appreciate any advise you can offer. Thank you so much.

Answer
Unfortunately this probelm does not all lie in magick.  There are some things even magick can't fix.  Magick cannot create true love.  And magick cannot override personal will power or self esteem issues.  God/dess does require us to take some responsibility for ourselves.  All is provided but you must ask for it and accept it.  Keep praying for him to realize that people love him.  I think it sounds like he is suicidal - he's just choosing to die slowly.  He has to hit bottom...all addicts have to hit bottom and realize they are losing everything before they heal.  I know its a hard thing to hear.  I lost my own husband this way.  He was a rock musician and no one would let him hit bottom.  He always had friends or family happy to have him around just so they could say he was there.  It's heartbreaking to watch them die, but no amount of healing magick will help someone who is sealed against it.

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I can answer all questions regarding natural spirituality and being a pagan. Being Wicca, Golden Dawn, Shamanist, whatever...is like saying you're Lutheran or Baptist. They are all forms of paganism and all based on natural spirituality. I am Romani (gypsy) and part Lakota (American Indian) and I was raised in natural spiritualism. I am a life path counselor for my group, a ritualist, and a spell weaver. Most of my work consists of guiding people on how to find spiritual peace in a very chaotic material world. Ask me anything.

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Romani and Lakota by blood and raised in the old traditions. High Priestess - Rainbow Moon Clan. Ordained Christian Minister

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