Panic Disorders/Attacks/Anxiety from previous neighbour noise
I hope you can help with this, not sure if its your area of expertise!
I have very very high levels of anxiety being in my own home due to 3 years of hell I suffered at the hands of my neighbours. They continually partied every weekend and many week nights- music thumping all night, shouting etc. I spoke to them several times about this and did get to know them, but the parties never stopped until they moved out a year ago. New neighbours have moved in- they are young (about 20-22) and I am petrified of hearing noise. I listen to the walls to see if they have music on (and if they do I panic in case it gets louder). I think they don't work so even on my days off I hate being in the house (especially the weekends) in case they are noisy. I feel anger toward them all the time even though as yet (last 7weeks) they haven't been that noisy. They bang about alot- I think that is their son, and their TV is too loud the odd time, but no parties as yet. However I cannot relax, I feel sick and have high levels of anxiety. I came off antidepressants when my last neighbour moved out and I don't want to go on them again. I am currently reading a book on Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, but can't believe it in my heart that things will be OK and that I will ever get over my fear. It is taking over my life and it consumes my thoughts all day. I currently work abroad but am meant to move home in a few months and don't think I can do it- being back in the house more than a few weekends each month is too much.
I am trying lots of things but nothing is working and I don't know what to do. I just want to be normal again before I ever moved into that house. Now I'm a wreck, have panic attacks and high anxiety levels. I can't stop believing that they are inconsiderate too and am just waiting for the hell to start. I believe it so strongly.
I appreciate any help you can offer,
Many thanks for taking the time
your stress and anxiety and panic attacks are caused by a sort of phobia you have about the prospect of your neighbours making noise. Although this is slightly out of my area I do have some experience myself with this and also my partner who is trained in hypnotherapy and CBT has advised me.
We all have a personal script which denotes how we react and behave in the world. this script is written from birth and is effected by our life experiences. in this case your script has been damaged by your previous experience with your old neighbours. so now your script is making you react in a totally wrong way to any new situation which is similar i.e neighbours and slight noise.
You must understand that your situation is only a temporary one, i know i went through panic attacks when i was in my teens and at the time thought there was no way out. but there is, believe me.
You have to trust me when i say that even though you will have doubts about anything working for you, you have to continue with your treatment no matter what in the belief that it will and does work. that is your starting place.
You need to do several things:
First practice breathing exercises every day. These will help you to control your panic attacks when they happens they will also allow your body to relax when you are feeling anxious. the more you practice the better you will become at them and the more effective they will be. please see my pages here for assistance with these.
next you should write down exactly what it is that is making you feel anxious. make it into a list and be as specific as you can. Now you need to challenge each one of these fears by asking yourself questions about them. this page will give you more of an idea about this
Often its the way we thinks about things which is the cause of our anxiety rather than the actual cause, so give this method a good go.
Lastly i think you would really benefit with some CBT sessions with a professional therapist. believe when i say, it really does help, even if you go into the sessions believing it won't, it will. unfortunately just reading a book does not give you enough help it just informs you of the methodology behind the therapy. Seek some help, you deserve to feel better sooner rather than later.
I hope i have been able to answer your question and that you will feel more assured that your current situation and emotions are only temporary and can be reversed.
best wishes Kate