Paranormal Phenomena/a friend


hello Mr. Clark
I wonder if you can help me out.
A friend of mine took his own life a week ago. he was 38. He did it brutally in front of his kids and family . I have been in a state of shock , sadness and heavy emotional pain since. I have so many questions and I am so troubled and feel such pain for those who loved him and had to witness this tragic event.

Since he passed I noticed a few strange things. I found myself having horrific nightmares, to the point I could swear I was being held down in my bed. I could feel a dark presence beside me and I woke up gasping for air. I keep seeing and feeling shadows passing around me like I think I see someone in the corner of my eye and I am constantly feeling a sense of anxiety and high nerves . Of course the recent events can definitely be a likeable explanation but something feels strange about this.

I was speaking about it to another close friend of the family and I mentioned that I had been asking before bed to my friend who killed himself to come to me, tell me he is ok to seek me out and it was when I began doing this that all the strange things began and she warned me with a suicide you cannot ask them to come back as its opening Pandora's box.  I was confused and I never heard such a thing.
I was wondering in your expertise have I done anything wrong? I suppose I am just so upset I seek answers I know I will probably never get.

Hi, I'm sorry to hear about what happened. I am not convinced that God views suicides as we have been traditionally told... i.e. that you necessarily go to hell, etc. Mind you, I don't believe in suicide because I imagine that it's sort of like skipping school. I believe we're here to learn and grow closer to God. So to suicide might be like absconding from class.

When a child skips class, a really good parent would patiently explain why he or she should attend. And since I believe God is the best parent, I imagine God would teach us how our actions have affected ourselves and others if we skip the class of life.

Is it possible that your trying to contact your friend has simply opened the door for some other presence to harass you? My suggestion is that you pray directly to God, or through a favoured saint, for the spiritual welfare of your friend. When you bring God into the picture it safeguards against the possibility of spiritual deception.

I hope this helps, and that your friend is okay.  

Paranormal Phenomena

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Michael Clark, Ph.D.


Iím not interested in fostering a selfish or manipulative approach to the so-called paranormal. But I'm happy to discuss the pros and cons of paranormal phenomena, especially the psychological aspects of the paranormal--i.e. parapsychology. Questions about minors should be directed to a licensed professional.


I run an educational website that touches on paranormal phenomena, among other related topics.

Print Media:
My table from "Religions and Cults" at is reproduced with permission in L. Lindsey, S. Beach and B. Ravelli, Core Concepts in Sociology, 2nd ed., p. 157

World Wide Web:
My online article "Letter to God" coauthored with Buddhist monk, E. Raymond Rock, appears on several different spirituality-based websites, including

I've interviewed, as a Christian, a self-proclaimed mystic:

My articles appeared at the former New View magazine and are published at

Ph.D. in Religious Studies
M.A. in Comparative Religion
B.A. Hon. in Psychology/Sociology
See my CV and letters of recommendation and my blog at

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