AboutLeslie Truex Expertise I am a parent of two, but also I'm a social worker with over 15 year experience working with children and families. I can provide many tips and techniques to help with child behavior, interventions for specific behavioral issues, ideas to help children through difficult times such as divorce or grief, hints on keeping the family running smoothly, and tips for developing confident, happy children.
Experience I have a master's in social work and over 15 years experience working with children and families. I have worked in schools, public health, mental health and adoption agencies providing parent education courses and children's groups.
Expert: Leslie Truex Date: 5/15/2008 Subject: 6 yr old.
Question hi there.. my name is rebekah and my husband and i are very young(early 20s), and have been married about a year. This year we decided we are going to adopt our 6 yr old niece(her dad is in jail and mom is long gone out of the picture). We are getting her for the summer for a "trial run" to see how things go with her. I love her so much and am very exited about it! Although, i am nervous too. I dont know anything about being a parent to a child, especially one that can already talk back and such! she is a great kid, but obviously she will have some emotional issues from her past that we will be dealing with. I am just fine with doing that, like i said she is very important to us. However, i need to know things to do with her to keep her occupied and having fun all summer(she is moving 9 hours away from everyone she knows to live with us) so i dont want her to be home sick! Also, is there anything you think we should do to make her feel more welcome or at home? If you cant answer these questions, i understand, i am just wanting to be as prepared as possible! thanks:)
Answer Hi Rebekah,
Is this placement being facilitated through Social Services? If so, be sure to sign up for all the benefits you can get. Even if she is doing well now, you never know what she might need in the future. Further, many social workers help the children and families create "life books" which are a terrific transitional tool and bridge from her old life to her new one. Be sure to ask about this.
You may want to look into some family counseling as a proactive way to help her and you and your husband adjust. Better now than when there are problems. Again, if she's being placed through social services, she is eligible for this service.
Visit your local library or contact the local school (she'll need to be enrolled) for ideas on activities in the area. I'd avoid sending her off to camp (unless you work and its a day camp) for the first month or so. You three need time to bond so the more you're together, the better. But the library and schools will have resources for kids classes, sports etc. If she's already involved in an activity, see if you can sign her up for one locally.
Finally, do you have friends or neighbors with kids? You may want to set up a summer "party" where they can come over for fun and meet your niece. Its a fun and low stress way for her mingle and make friends.
See if you can talk with her case worker and her foster family (if she's in care) as they will have some ideas as well. Let them know that you want to make it an easy transistion so if they have ideas to please let you know.
