AboutLeslie Truex Expertise I am a parent of two, but also I'm a social worker with over 15 year experience working with children and families. I can provide many tips and techniques to help with child behavior, interventions for specific behavioral issues, ideas to help children through difficult times such as divorce or grief, hints on keeping the family running smoothly, and tips for developing confident, happy children.
Experience I have a master's in social work and over 15 years experience working with children and families. I have worked in schools, public health, mental health and adoption agencies providing parent education courses and children's groups.
Expert: Leslie Truex Date: 6/19/2008 Subject: 5 year old misbehaving at school
Question I'm a single mother of a 5 year old son. He recently started summer camp at his day care. He is very excited & very proud to be with the 'big kids". Problem is, he has been barred from 2 field trips for not following directions. At home he isn't very good at following directions. Like most 5 year old boys, he is very excitable & can get carried away easily. We talk about why it's important to follow directions (I'm not sure if he's taking it in or not), but I just don't know what to do. Any advice? Sometimes I wonder if the teachers are taking his age into account, but it can be hard to question them because I work at the day care too. I don't want him to miss out, but I also want him to follow the rules so he has fun & stays safe. I would appreciate any advice you could provide!
Answer Hi Elizabeth,
Five year olds may understand what you're talking about, but that doesn't always translate into behavior change. Children are impulsive and have lower cognitive abilities that adults. So immediate consequences are the best way to deter or correct behavior. Unless he has ADD or ADHD, being excitable or carried away can be managed and controlled through child management techniques.
He may feel bad when he misses the trip, but he may not put together that he's missing out because of something he did last week or yesterday. What does the school do when he misbehaves? What do you do? Consequences must make an impression (so that he thinks twice before doing it again) and they must teach (what is the correct behavior). Finally they need to make since and be enacted as soon as possible from when the infraction occurred. If he gets time out, it needs to be done quietly or time starts over and at the end he needs to tell you why he was there and what he'll do differently next time.
You may want to consider finding a parent education class in your area or get some parenting books. Many have really great ideas for discipline and the more ideas you have, the easier it is.
