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Parenting K-6 Kids/Who's at fault-me or my 6 year old

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Hello, I don't know where to begin..I'm totally frustrated and overwhelmed at the moment and am not able to figure out what exactly is the problem.

My son is going to be 6in January. He has always been very active physically and is in lot of running and physical play. He has joined a new school in kindergarten and he is reading and writing at grade level 1. Since preschool we had heard from his teachers that he is very playful and doesn't sit..but of late, he has driven me and my husband crazy..he does his class work and homework terribly bad..only when we sit with him, he will do the work..he was so fond of reading earlier..since past 2months, he hasn't touched his books..when someone visits or when we go to someone's house..he embarrasses us by his bad behavior and he makes a point not to listen to us and do exactly opposite..he does not follow the rules in games and so other kids don't want to play with him..and it's ok for him, he doesn't feel bad when they refuse to play with him. I took away his previlages like tv..and he was totally ok with it..not even once he tried to behave.time outs, chore charts don't work as he doesn't  listen to rules and does whatever he wants. Also, he doesn't want to eat himself, he wants me to feed him..I tried not to do that..for the whole day he stayed hungry and not even once he asked for food. Shouting, spanking,emotional talk doesn't. Work..and he is back to his own self in max 5minut.

He has lost all interest in activities he liked earlier and now he only wants to jump, play and that too without considering safety. He is using objectionable words esp when guests are around..and yes, he is obsessed about repitition..he will keep on. Saying the same thing or watch the me cartoon episode again and again..till we stop him..he doesn't realize that someone is upset or angry with his behavior and doesn't seem to understand what is he doing

I don't know what's going on..is he a defiant child passing through a phase, or he is an attention seeker..whatever strategies I know..I have tried on..does my child need professional help or do I need guidance in parenting.

We haven't heard anything from his teacher in school...it's only at home we are seeing this behavior..though he needs reminders etc in school as well....I find his behavior disturbing

Answer
Hello Parul
Thank you for writing. Have you taken him to his pediatrician. I would recommend that first to rule out any emotional issues. I am concerned about the changes that he has made.Once he is cleared by his pediatrician. You  can write me back and  I will  give you some strategies to try. It seems that there is a lot going on with him right now. I do have a question though. Why are you feeding him. He was not hungry, because if he was he would have asked for food. How does he eat at school?

Looking forward to hearing from you.
Blessings,
Dr. Swaby

Parenting K-6 Kids

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Dr. Mabel J. Swaby

Expertise

I can answer questions about Pre-K 5th grade. How to listen and talk to your child.Discipline that makes sense and much, how to understand your childs behavior and more. I am able to answer questions about teens,as well I have worked sucessfully with teens in foster care and a teen center, I have a great understanding of teens behavior.

Experience

I am retired teacher.(2005)and administrator. I am a Court Appointed Special Advocate(CASA) with the Juvenile Court for the past 6 years. Working with children and teens in foster care. I am a S.T.E.P.( Systematic Training For Effective Parenting) Parent Educator, and I am preparing to conduct workshops in my community.

Education/Credentials
Masters in Early Childhood Education/Certification in instructional Leadership Court Appointed Special Advocate(CASA) (Volunteer) S.T.E.P Parent Educator/Leader-(Systematic Training for Effective Parenting) Parent-Aide Oasis Counseling Center

Awards and Honors
Teacher of the Year Judical Commendation Award from the Juvenile Court

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