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Parenting K-6 Kids/help what do i do 5 year old girl

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Expert: Debbie Preece - 12/29/2006


Question
heres the past father left when she was one i was a single mother for about 4 years , she now regularly visits her dad on weekends an he was in her life somewhat before that i have a fiance now hes ben here about a year hes very good with her an she liks him very well,my daughter was not discplined alot when she was little because at 1st she was the first grandchild an my only of course but now we just have a problem of telling her what to do an she doesnt want to do it so shes not going to do it until shes ready , she constantly yells back at me an tells me no,its to the point of i dont know what to do or how to come across this anymore it makes me frustrated with her.heres what happened today we were going to his moms house an she did want to go she was putting her shoes on an i told her i was stopping by the store to grab something really quick on the way up there an that she would sit in the cr with him she got mad wouldnt put her shoes on an said no were not stopping by the store , as i try to get her shoes on shes throwing herself around kicking an screaming an then just throwing a fit , so we didnt go no where any thing u can tell me or help me with would be great.....

Answer
Hi Amanda,
I feel your frustration.  I too was a frustrated mom.  At least you have recognized that you have been too lenient and a change is necessary.  I had a daughter that threw temper tantrums and out of frustration I developed the most amazing parenting tool.  I discovered that I had taught her that she had control in the family by allowing this behavior and I had to take back my parental role.  Through Prayer, I discovered  "The Happy Face Token System" and within 1 week, she was over her temper tantrums and when I called for her help, she came running the first time I called, happily and cheerfully and asked "What can I do for you Mommy?"  This amazing gift has built-in consistency for mom and provides the means that the child needs to feel motived to respond that way.  I used it over 10 years in my family and found that the more difficult the child, the better it worked.  If you would like to visit my web site, I have some pages from my book that give pretty good insights to get going, but the secret to consistency, is found in the book.  I will be happy to give you an "EXPERTS" discount of $10.00 off my book "From Combat Zone to Love at Home", my National Parenting Cassette and my CDROM.  This normally sells for $25.00.  I offer an unconditional 30 day complete refund, minus postage, no questions asked.  Mention this answer for the discount.  Here is my web site   
http://parenting101.home.att.net
good luck.

Parenting K-6 Kids

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Debbie Preece

Expertise

Feeling frustrated with your parenting skills? Learn how to get first-time obedience cheerfully and happily from children 4-14. Designed for the easy use of Mom and the children keep it going. This Christian author has taught this remarkable system, over 25 years, to battle-weary parents' worldwide who are trying desperately to raise children that contribute to a happy family, better society, and love of God. She has spoken to standing room only audiences that laugh and cry with her as she shares her insightful discovery of a unique parenting tool that she declares is a gift from God. The charts actually work and have been kid tested and Mother approved worldwide. The room specific, chore charts provide the accountabiltiy factor(Garden Experience)by providing a "Do/Did" box by each line item task and step by step instructions help develop specific skills and expertise in doing a job well done. Instruction for PMS/PMDD as well as ADD/ADHD and non-compliance behavior. http://biblebasedparenting101.com

Experience

One desperate night after a very trying day, while raising three children four years apart, Debbie found herself in "Shock" with the behavior of her children and frustrated with her parenting skills. Her home had become a Combat Zone and she was the prisoner! The "Golden Rule" wasn't working. It seemed the more she did for her children, the more selfish and demanding they became. Teaching internal values like integrity and honesty and family values, such as, manners and first time obedience happily and cheerfully were a ‘mission impossible’. The consistency factor on the parenting side was booby trapped by the troops all day long. That night, after holding up her flag of surrender, she sent an emergency S.O.S. to her commander in chief and a new battle plan was developed that virtually guaranteed her survival and that of her family. What resulted in 1983 was “The Happy Face Token System.” Her sigh of relief (AHH!) could be heard in the form of happy children responding with; "What can I do for you Mommy? May I set the table? You’re the BEST MOMMY IN THE WHOLE WORLD!" She had gained control of her family and a truce had been accepted with this most remarkable interactive parenting tool. Consistency was a built-in feature of this now “Kid Tested & Mother Approved” INTERACTIVE experience. http://dissdcourtesy.com

Publications
NEW PRINTING: 2010 From Combat Zone to Love at Home: The Happy Face Token System From Combat Zone to Love at Home 1995 (book)
Mommytalk.com http://happyfacetokens.com http://biblebasedparenting101.com http://foxholeparenting.com http://debbiepreece.com

Education/Credentials
REVIEW: If we are to take the Lord God as our model in raising children, then the implication is that we should also provide appropriate rewards. I have never wanted to "bribe" our children into compliance, so I found the following excerpt from Debbie Preece's book very interesting: She notes that: ". . . according to Webster's Dictionary a bribe is: 'Anything especially money-given or promised to induce a person to do something illegal or wrong.' . . . Webster's defines a blessing as, 'The gift of divine favor. Anything that gives happiness or prevents misfortune.' This book is packed with fun ideas like "The Slothful Servant Quarantine," as well as practical charts and ideas. Altogether a very valuable resource to aid you in child training and setting up and enforcing chores. Lorrie Flem, Editor of TEACH Magazine. author's note: The SLOTHFUL SERVANT ROOM QUARANTINE is designed for ages 8-18. This provides a simple and effective way to get children to clean their rooms to your specifics. They can't use the room until the QUARANTINE is taken down by you. Psychologists refer to this type of reward system as "A Token Economy" or tokenomics as I like to say. It provides a positive, happy experience for compliance and a negative experience, that of losing tokens, when ignored.

Awards and Honors
HAPPY PARENT AWARD EDUCATIONAL CLEARING HOUSE "With From Combat Zone To Love At Home, the weight is off of your shoulders, because the program sets the rules of the game in place." OUTSTANDING PRODUCT FOR OUTSTANDING RESULTS."For very little out of the pocket expense, you can gain some order and peace in your home. All of the charts, tokens etc. are all included in the book... Full instructions are included on the tape, she walks you thru it, in its entirety." Lorrie Flem, Editor of TEACH Magazine:Chore and Behavior Systems-SUPERIOR PRODUCT RATING "I have long been engrossed in trying to find the perfect chore and behavior system for my family to use. This illusive system must be easy to implement, inexpensive, appealing to mother and children, and of course, effective. FROM COMBAT ZONE TO LOVE AT HOME is one of my favorites."

Past/Present Clients
REVIEW: I've just begun listening to the audio tape of your seminar and also reading your book about your Wonderful system. I'm excited to think that perhaps I've found system that might actually work! I too have tried everything I can think of to achieve the results you talk about. My spirit quickened when you talked about the analogy of the Garden of Eden and I'm anxious to get started. Sincerely and gratefully, Julie M Oklahoma City, OK, REVIEW: I am so excited about your book. My sister-in-law brought it on our family camp out and in the four days we were there I read it twice and discussed it heavily with my husband. We are ready to get started. We started trying to use the system while we were camping and the change in our children was incredible. Michelle G. Phoenix, AZ

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