Expert: Mona R. Spiegel, Ph.D. - 10/30/2006

Question
hello. my daughter is just turning six in November. she is very hyper, she is in kindergarten. she is very smart but when it comes to common sense every day things, she just don't remember. like flushing the toilet, she forgets every time. dinner is a struggle every night, she spaces off and says she forgets to chew!? she is great when it comes to home work shes great! how do i get her focused into doing the every day little things? is she just testing me and my husband. is this normal behavior for kids her age?

Answer
Dear melissa,

Your daughter sounds like a typical 6-year-old.  At the moment she may be oppositional and "forget" to do things.  However, the more you remind her to do them, the more that you reinforce the negative behaviors that you don't want to see!  

Usually, the best strategy is to ignore the negative as much as possible and to look for behaviors that you can praise (such as the lovely way she does her homework).  Try, above all, not to get into a battle of wills with her; no one wins that battle.

For more information about my parent coaching experience, go to my website http://www.myfamilycoach.com

Good luck!
Dr. Mona Spiegel
Psychologist & Coach