AboutJ.L. Slipak Expertise Over the last 19 years, I have been researching the issue of stepparenting/stepchildren and living life as a blended family. I have 4 stepchildren. I am available to answer any questions regarding parenting a stepchild/stepchildren and will base my answers using my own personal experience with 4 of my own.
I'm an advocate for children with special needs and have worked in the legal area of Family Law and Civil Law for 7 years. I'm a published writer of this subject. I have dealt with many issues including: dealing with the biological parent, eating disorders, relationships between siblings, education, access, etc. I can offer support, personal opinions and resources based on research I've used while writing about these subjects. Don't ask me any questions that you have the answers for already. Make sure you include all information pertaining to the question at hand, as I base my answers on what you've sent me. Remember, this is just my opinion and nothing else. I wish all stepparents great success with their perspective lives. Remember it takes a lot to step in when others have stepped out.
Experience
Education/Credentials BFA, working towards my Masters. Stepparent of 4 stepchildren.Bioparent of two, all inclusive of two special needs children: one down syndrome; the other ODD/ADD.
Question My husband's daughter has been jealous of me since I first met her 25 years ago. She is in her late 30s now, and the jealousy still goes on.
I have very little to do with her, since she doesn't speak to me, except to ask for her dad when she calls on the phone.
If my husband tells her I am ailing, she will intercept immediately with an ailment of her own. One time, she said
"well, I sneezed 7 times today".
I realize she is immature, and I try to ignore that she refers to me as "she" or "her". But, I wonder . . does this every get better? Or, will she ever stop being so jealous? Should my husband say something to her?
They are going to be visiting us for a few days, and I'm dreading the thought. She is nasty to me, and is always ready to jump down my throat when I say something. I plan to stay out of the way, and hope that the few days go by very quickly.
Answer Hello Kristin,
I see this quite a bit during my research. Adult stepchildren can be the most difficult. I've always suggested to ignore the snide comments and keep yourself busy to avoid problems during visits... but I would also add, it is my experience that unless her biodad steps in and says something, defends you... You will have to rise above the nonsense and be the better person for it.
