Parenting --Teens/18 year old very difficult and disrespectful at home
Beentheredonethat wrote at 2011-06-08 18:59:51
I agree with this - and I also agree with those who are reading this without any intention of setting firm limits. 18 years old means one is legally an adult, and it is up to you to train your child to be an adult -- either as they grow up, or now, after reaching adulthood. It will be much kinder to treat him as if you expect him to succeed on his own, rather than attempting to control every turn he takes. You cannot live your child's life but you can still help the outcome. Let go and let him fail. The sooner you do, the sooner he'll figure things out. Put the extra effort into something YOU need.
Sara wrote at 2013-08-24 01:33:28
Out of the blue, I decided to pull up this post from two years ago. So glad to be past those days. Our son has done a marvelous job maturing in the last two years. Access to his student account was granted immediately after a fantastic advisor told the students that they need to give us access and be grateful for our support. Our son very quickly learned how much he appreciated his family when he went away to college. Are things totally smooth when he is home, no, we sometimes argue or he snaps, but he is the first one to give me a shoulder rub when I have had a bad day at work and always remembers to thank us for any assistance. He has matured so much on his own in part because he loves what he is studying at school and has done better academically then in high school. Each year, you can see his personal growth and today he finished a summer job where the departments are fighting to have him come back. Most importantly, he makes it evident how much he loves his family.
L wrote at 2013-11-20 00:10:43
I wanted to add some follow up information. Our 18 year old is now heading towards 21 and he has really matured. Going away to school opened his eyes and really made him appreciate his family. We are fortunate that we have a relative who is a financial advisor and she has been working with him for the past few years on setting budgets and living within them. He continues to be our most affectionate kid! When he does come home, he doesn't always do the things that we want him to do, when we want them but for the most part, he knows how to live agreeably with all. After 3 years, he decided that the girlfriend was not right for him (to our relief) and he is enjoying being on his own and focusing on his career aspirations. He is still a work in progress, but a good one!