Parenting--Toddlers/Infants/Pre-Schoolers/Question about child sees genitals

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Question
So I was attacked and questioned rape and abuse.  After a lot of the abuse, this picture of me seeing my baby brother's penis at age 11 for 3 seconds went through my head.  I was compelled to choke myself with an electric cord.  I had been raped and this image kept going thru my head and so I told my mother what I had done.  That I'd seen my brother's penis at age 1-2 for 3 seconds.  I'd never seen.  When confronted with molesters and rapists around me, I feel compelled to not judge and it bothers me.  I came to this site and read a lot about different perspectives.  I've OBVIOUSLY never had any interest in children or people younger than me.  In fact, I feel a little sickened by people who are "sweet like children" and these things actually are a turn-off to me and I feel a sense of revulsion.  Just wanted to make sure there's nothing wrong with me and announce it again.  Additionally - I remember being in daycare playing in a crawl box on the playground with another boy.  I remember his name was Marcus.  He flashed me and I flashed him.  We were 3 at the oldest, 4.  It took 2 seconds and then I RAN out into the playground.  I hope that this is normal, whenever I judge an abusive man or a rapist or pedophile these thoughts go thru my head again and again.

Answer
Hello Robin,
 I'm sorry to hear that you are disturbed by images from your childhood that keep coming back to you.
Nothing you have described in your email sounds abnormal. However, if you continue to be troubled by images that flash in your mind, it might be well to see a counselor for a few sessions to learn how to keep these images from intruding on your thoughts and bothering you.
Best wishes,
James Windell

Parenting--Toddlers/Infants/Pre-Schoolers

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James Windell

Expertise

I can answer questions related to normal child development, disturbed behavior and how to provide appropriate guidance and discipline.

Experience

I've been a clinical psychologist in a juvenile court, worked in school settings, been a child psychotherapist in a private psychiatric clinic and consulted with schools, courts, hospitals and daycare centers.

Organizations
American Psychological Association
Michigan Psychological Association

Publications
I have been a columnist with the Oakland Press (Oakland County, MI) for 21 years writing a weekly column called Coping With Kids, which is also published weekly in the Staten Island Advance. I have been a mental health columnist with the Detroit Free Press and a columnist for Working Mother Magazine. In addition, I have published articles in professional journals. I have published 16 books, among them are "8 Weeks to a Well-Behaved Child" (IDG Books), "Discipline: A Sourcebook of 50 Failsafe Techniques for Parents" (IDG Books); "Children Who Say No When You Want Them to Say Yes" (IDG Books), "What You Need to Know About Ritalin" (Bantam Books) "6 Steps to an Emotionally Intelligent Teenagers" (John Wiley & Sons), "The Fatherstyle Advantage" (Stewart, Tabori & Chang) and "Defusing High Conflict Divorce" (Impact Publishers). My latest parenting book (2012) is "The Everything Child Psychology and Development Book." Articles about my work with parents has appeared in the New York Times, the Chicago Sun Times, the Detroit News and the Detroit Free Press. My website at Jimwindell.com includes more information about me, my books and includes many columns I've written.

Education/Credentials
B.A. in Psychology from Wayne State University
M.A. in Clinical Psychology from Oakland University

Awards and Honors
Best Educational Program by Juvenile and Family Court Judges Association (National award for the development of a parent training program for parents of delinquent teenagers. Beth Clark Service Award from the Michigan Psychological Association.

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