Parenting--Toddlers/Infants/Pre-Schoolers/spanked my baby :(


Today my 14-month old daughter bit me. I was so shocked I gave her a swat on her butt and told her not to. She started crying. I always said I wouldn't spank and me and my husband agreed not to. I feel really bad about this. Do you think it'll damage her self-esteem? Also, how do you think I can stop her biting? She's been biting quite a bit.


As a parent who believes in spanking, I personally feel you handled the situation well. The only other thing I would have done was a very firmly said "NO BITE". The one way I broke my kids of biting was to lightly smack their mouth (more of a tap on the lips than a smack) with saying NO BITE and if they bit a second time, they got bit in the same spot just as hard. They each stopped after 3-4 biting incidents.

You haven't ruined her, and won't, even with spanking, as long as you explain her error and what she should have done and make sure there is a balance of love the rest of the time. I raise my kids in accordance with the Biblical view of "spare the rod and spoil the child". However i have firm rules...biting or saying cuss words, a light pop on the mouth. Reaching for something after being told no, a smack on the hand. More serious offenses or repeated wrongs, a smack on the butt never to exceed three smacks even for the most serious offense and always a conversation after we both calm down on what is expected.


All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts


Melissa Payne


I can answer questions about children from newborn (including preemie) to school age. I can also try to provide emotional support for people who have had a stillborn child. I am a part-time working, stay-at=home, online college attending Mom who has a very hectic schedule and love it. I also have my own blog -, which includes a very affordable email recipe subscription, shirts supporting my site (all proceeds from shirt sales go into my children's savings accounts, so please be generous) and - coming soon - some of my hand crocheted items (pillows and stuffed animals).


I have 7 children - 2 daughters born November 2004, November 2005, a son born September 2008, a son born in September 2010, a son born February 2013, a son born October 2014 and a son born February 2016. My daughter born in 2005 was a preemie (3 months early) and I also had a daughter stillborn in 2006 and a miscarriage of a daughter in 2009.

I am a lifetime member of Business Professionals of America.


I have a diploma in Child Day Care and an Associate Degree in Teacher Aide. I have worked in the Day Care field, as well as having my own children.

©2017 All rights reserved.