Parenting--Toddlers/Infants/Pre-Schoolers/Bath time as a struggle?


Could you pls advise?

My 6-year-old son is very lazy when it comes to bath time. When we try to ask him to go to the bathroom, it is always a struggle. I'm tired of it and can become angry.

What can we do to make it easier?

My sincere thanks,


My kids don't usually make it much easier than your son, I'm afraid.  Especially when it comes to getting their hair washed.  Taking a bath is great with them until it comes to washing their hair, and I'm very cautions about getting soap/water anywhere near their eyes.  I have them put their head all the way back, using a cup to rinse, while keeping my hand near their forehead both to hold their head still and to keep water from running towards their eyes.  Unfortunately, they still have a fit.

It did get better with my girls and my 5 year old son when I started letting them take showers, after showing them it was possible to stand under the water while it stayed out of their face.  I then worked with them on letting them wash and rinse their own hair, or holding a washcloth over their eyes while I rinse.  Once they became competent to wash and rinse their own hair with minimal supervision, it became less of a struggle.

I would suggest trying to let him shower, if possible, and talking him through things before they need done, showing him while standing beside the tub (not in with him as the water bouncing off you will wind up hitting him) how to get all the soap, etc.

Main thing is try to stay calm, remember that even we have fears that seem irrational to others (for me, it's spiders) but that each person's individual fears are just as strong, even if they have no basis that we can identify with.  The more upset you get, your son will pick up on your emotions and then become even more upset.  Try options, try asking what he would be comfortable with - letting him know that washing WILL happen, but you're willing to compromise and turn some control over to him, as long as it gets accomplished properly.  Just having some say in the matter may help him remain calmer...(ie. "You need to rinse the shampoo out of your hair.  Would you like a washcloth over your face to keep it dry, or would you like to try and rinse it yourself?")


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Melissa Payne


I can answer questions about children from newborn (including preemie) to school age. I can also try to provide emotional support for people who have had a stillborn child. I am a part-time working, stay-at=home, online college attending Mom who has a very hectic schedule and love it. I also have my own blog -, which includes a very affordable email recipe subscription, shirts supporting my site (all proceeds from shirt sales go into my children's savings accounts, so please be generous) and - coming soon - some of my hand crocheted items (pillows and stuffed animals).


I have 7 children - 2 daughters born November 2004, November 2005, a son born September 2008, a son born in September 2010, a son born February 2013, a son born October 2014 and a son born February 2016. My daughter born in 2005 was a preemie (3 months early) and I also had a daughter stillborn in 2006 and a miscarriage of a daughter in 2009.

I am a lifetime member of Business Professionals of America.


I have a diploma in Child Day Care and an Associate Degree in Teacher Aide. I have worked in the Day Care field, as well as having my own children.

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