Expert: The Recovering Sorority Girls (Kristina - 9/8/2009

Question
Hello!
I am a New York socialite, and I am planning a huge Christmas party. But there are two family's I do not want to invite. I am inviting all of my friends and people I don't know that well at my church-- but how do I exclude these people when most of the people at the church are invited?
Also, can you give me just genrel party tips, on how to plan things out correctly and also how to make my guests feel conferable?

Answer
Doesn't the New York Social Register provide tips to socialites like yourself?  Just kidding, we have some suggestions too.

Given today's obsession with being on-line and staying connected, some might argue that guest lists are public information.  We disagree.  A guest list is often a very private matter.  Simply choose a more private form of communicating your event's particulars.  While it may seem outdated, snail mail allows you to invite specific individuals and/or families.  It's very unlikely that someone who did not receive an invitation would approach you to inquire, but if they do, you've got two options:  you can relent, in the spirit of the holidays, and just apologize for the postal service's mishap and invite this family, or you can simply say that it's a smaller guest list and you decided to only invite the families with whom you are acquainted.  

In terms of executing your party plan, we have the following suggestions.  Get your basic housekeeping done at least a full day in advance.  Nothing slows down a party prep like vacuuming.  Second, if you are planning to do the cooking, start test driving your recipes now.  Pay attention to how long it takes you to prep your ingredients, pre-heat ovens, cook, etc.  Determine what can be done ahead of time, and take some notes because you don't want to second guess yourself the day of your big event.  Give yourself plenty of time to decorate, and don't be afraid to ask a friend or two to help.  Don't forget to factor in the time you'll need to change and get ready to look fabulous at your event.  We're big fans of creating timelines to serve as a checklist for big events.

We truly believe that guests have a great time when you're having a great time.  But when you're mixing different sets of friends, provide them with conversation starters.  Recognizing that you can't be everywhere talking to everyone all at once consider some rolling activities.  Set up a decorate your own holiday sugar cookie table or ask guests to help you trim your tree.  Most importantly, as your guests start to RSVP, begin thinking of how you might introduce various individuals to one another - consider common hobbies, similar hometowns, favorite restaurants, etc.  When you rattle off a quick two sentence introduction, you'll look genius.  As a last resort, hang some mistletoe in a prominent place and embrace the magic of the holidays.

Salut!
Morgan & Brooksie