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Pediatrics/Behavioral issues in 5 year old


Hello! We have been having some problems with our 5 year old. She has a VERY strong desire to do things she know she is not supposed to do. At one point he kept saying a " private" word 100 and more times a day. Talking, explaining, punishing her for that didn't help. We tried to ignore it but she d say it in public, at daycare and put us in uncomfortable situation. She also started paying I think a little too much attention to private areas and it seemed her curiosity was a lot more than just hey whats that. Then she started complaining about stomachache even though she didn't seem uncomfortable. She d just constantly like 100 times a day say "my belly hurts" and would keep doing what she was doing. It subsided a little but now she wants to lick EVERYTHING. She licks her fingers particularly after bathroom after she touches her private, floor, toys, clothing. She even says she wants to lick the bottom of shoes! It's horrible! And every time she does it she feels like she has to tell us with guilty mind. She knows its bad but she just genuinely cant help herself. Her words: "I just really really want to do it mommy". In general if you tell her not to do something she really really wants to do it. And not because she just wants to disobey us but she's got desire which she cannot resist. (please don't touch the computer - I really have to mommy please; please don't turn the lights on- I have to really bad mommy).
Deep inside she is a smart,  very sweet and passionate little girl. She loves to play and laugh and have fun. We give her lots of love and attention. But she wants more attention from us. As soon as she comes home from daycare her first words are "play with me". And it's non stop. I know she feels stressed and frustrated. At daycare she doesn't seem to know how to play with other children and she really wants to. She tries but she ends up playing by herself. I think it upsets her she just cant put it in words. And she is a goodie girl there, very obedient. But I see she is tense and not comfortable. There is no point of changing the daycare or teachers because both are fine. It's not them it is her. Also she goes peepee there constantly (like every 10 minutes) even though she has no medical problem.
I feel really bad for her. I don't want her to have social problems in the future or feel stressed all the time (she always seems uncomfortable in new environment, she can't break into new groups or just run around freely like other kids without a fear that she is doing something wrong. And if an adult tells her not to do something she freezes and then sits still somewhere. Even though she doesn't listen to us and we always try to be fair with her.)
I don't know what to do. Maybe you can recommend some books I can read or any advice would be appreciated. We live oversees and I don't think I can find professional guidance here.
Sorry for such a long letter. Just wanted to give the most accurate description of the situation.
Thank you

I do not think any medicine will  help her. Modern medicine is still  evolving and we still have too many unanswered questions. Here are my suggestions.
Watch her diet-the food we eat does affect our minds. Avoid artificial flavors as much as  possible. Do not give too spicy diet

Avoid negative  approach. Telling a child  not to something will only make matters worse. Instead tell her  what to  do. Try to keep her  busy with activities she enjoys.

Make sure you have good vibrations in the  house. Negative vibrations  can adversely affect the delicate mind of a  child.

Pray regularly. It helps. Human being is not just body and mind. There is a soul also.

I have prayed for your child. God bless her.


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Dr. Arun Kumar Suri


I can answer questions in the field of general pediatrics-questions regarding the development of children, immunization, feeding, weaning and common childhood problems like fever, cough and recurrent illness. Many of these topics are dealt with on my website Healthy Family Happy Family. Often a mother imagines that her child is sick when in fact there is no problem. Such a mother needs explanation and reassurance. I will not be able to answer specific questions regarding diagnosis.


I have more than 20 years of experience as a Pediatrician. I have been involved in the care of premature babies and also many critically ill children.

I am attached to a Mission hospital in a small town in the Kannur dist. of Kerala in India. I also have my private clinic in a nearby place.

Most of my articles are on my website Healthy Family Happy Family. I have also contributed articles to Ezine Articles and Article City. I believe that Pediatrics is more than treating diseases in children. I advocate holistic approach to child health and problems of children giving equal importance to physical, psychological and spiritual health of children.

M.B.B.S. D.C.H. I have completed a distant course in adolescent health conducted by IMA AKN SINHA INSTITUTE. I have also completed an online course on Ayurvedic care of children conducted by Jiva Institute.

Awards and Honors
My website has been recognized by HONcode for trustworthy information on health. It has also been listed by, and

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