Phobias/social phobia- eye contact
My name is simona. I am suffering from social phobia( social anxiety disorder). Can you give me one suggestion. One of my problem is that while looking into the eyes of the people walking along the road, I get anxious and can not make a proper eye contact. Now I as per Cognitive behaviour therapy, I tried to solve this problem by making a hierarchy, but I did not get success. Now I made another hierarchy as follows,
First step is that i am trying to make eye contact with people while there are at a distance of few meters away, not very close to me. Till date I am able to do this comfortably. Second step may be that I will make eye contact with people from a comparative close distance.
I will upgrade to higher level depending upon the response. But I am not sure about this hierarchy. Am I doing a right thing or is it not correct. please advice. If its not correct then could you please make a hierarchy for me. I will be grateful to you for that.
Simona, in some cultures direct eye contact is a sign of disrespect and often makes people uneasy no matter what their cultural norms are, anyway.
Certainly, making eye contact at a distance can usually be established, however as you draw closer to the oncoming individual, you may encounter their own "safe zone" of contact, either visual or physical.
I think that in the bigger picture you might investigate the EFT process for healing phobias, fears, anxiety, sadness and grief. This simple "tapping" sequence can do miracles for many people who are haunted by past traumatic memories or experiences.
Look up EFT (emotional freedom technique) at sites like:
www.eft.mercola.com for more instructions and resources
Once you clear the root causes of your social phobias, you will be more comfortable to engage others out in public and they will feel you in a more genuine way than when you are harboring anxiety and fear.