Psychiatry & Psychology--General/Workplace issue


Hello Dr

I'm a young man 31 y/o. I have a bachelor degree and a regular job. Recently I'm having a sort of issue in my workplace. There is a coworker of mine 33 y/o, who we used to be good colleagues before, who keeps throwing sarcastic jokes on me and especially in front of others. Before used to be jokes, but now I feel that the jokes went a little to far and obviously the relation with him was worsen because of this. Currently we keep cold relation to each other, speaking only to each other when the job requires to do so. But unfortunately the guy has "sophisticated" his sarcastic remarks by using a different language. Still the remarks are directed to me even though he does not mention my name. I used to ignore it but it seems that my action are not effective. The guys seems to feel empowered because his remarks make other laugh. Even though I try to seem like not caring about what he says, still this kind attitude of mine does not give effects. I cannot accuse him of nothing or bring the issue to top management since he does not mention my name or speak to me. His irony seems to be quite developed and advanced and I feel like powerless. I'm not the type of the guy who is aggressive of bully. I usually mind my own business. What can I do, what option are left to me since ignoring this behavior is not giving any result. I even thought to speak to him privately but I can't accuse him of nothing since he does not use my name when he uses his irony? Dr, you may say how do I know that his words are directed to me. I know for sure because he makes fun of things I'm involved too. I don't suffer from any paranoia and my health is very good in general. Please advice me DR

Best regards,


Sometimes we need to see ourselves doing something to advance our own causes in the face of, bullying, even if we truly believe it will not make any difference.

If you can do this without in any way jeopardizing your job, you will feel better if see yourself telling this person that the way he is talking to you or about you is making you uncomfortable and that you do not enjoy this kind of mean spirited banter and that you would appreciate it if he could please cease doing this.  You do not have to be "accusing," because you are just saying that what he is doing makes you feel uncomfortable whether or not it is in fact directed at you.

He may choose to pick on someone else as a result, but even if he does not you will have at least defended your honor by asking him to stop.  It would also help if you could make contact with other people that he does the same thing to, since such people rarely restrict their mean behavior to a single person, since it is a reveal about their true personality.  An alliance can be formed with all of his "victims," that will eventually create strength in numbers to stand up to him.

I always say goodness is stronger than evil, but only when the good people come together.


Dr. Andrew Elmore

Psychiatry & Psychology--General

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Andrew M. Elmore, Ph.D.


I can answer questions about: Stress. Headaches. Stress-related Disorders. Anxiety/Panic Disorder. Depression. Psychopathology. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Personal Problem Solving. Life in General. Relationships: Love, Friendship, Business Partner, Coworker, Family,Child/Parent. What makes us tick. The use of psycho-pharmacological agents in combination with psychological treatment. How to deal with evil people in your life. How to improve your outlook under duress. How to control stress. How to control mood. How to control headaches. I cannot answer: Questions about Eating Disorders. Questions about computers.


30 years in private practice as a psychologist in Manhattan. Dealing with people from almost every conceivable ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds, and as many character types as exist in this country. Dealing with patients from 8 years old to 90 years old. Pioneer in biofeedback and the treatment of stress-related disorders. Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine since 1982. Treatment of stress-related, anxiety and depressive disorders with biofeedback and cognitive behavioral therapy. Developed personal problem solving, an extremely precise form of psychotherapy. Relationship therapy for couples, families, parent/child issues, business partners, coworkers, employers, and dealing with psychopathic individuals in your life.

American Psychological Association. Association for Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback. Biofeedback Certification Institute of America. New York Academy of Sciences.

The journal, Psychophysiology. The book, Expanding Dimensions of Consciousness. The journal, Headache. The journal, Biofeedback and Self-Regulation. The journal Psychiatry Digest. The book, The TMJ Book. The book, Dental Phobia. The network, CNN. Parade Magazine. The newspaper, Newsday. The Manhattan TV station, WCBS. The national news program, The CBS Evening News. The newspaper, The New York Post. The national TV program, The Phil Donohue Show. The magazine, The New Yorker. The magazine, Glamor. The magazine, Redbook. The magazine, Health. The magazine, Bottom Line Personal. Web MD. The website, Healthology. The magazine, Newsweek.

Ph.D. SUNY at Stony Brook, 1979. B.A., magna cum laude with Honors in Psychology, Illinois Wesleyan University, 1974.

Awards and Honors
Who’s Who in Medicine and Healthcare, First, Second and Third Editions, 1997-2000. Appointed to the Training Faculty of the Biofeedback Certification Institute of America (BCIA), 1993. Senior Fellow BCIA. New York Academy of Sciences, 1987. Who’s Who in the East, 1983-present. Who’s Who in Frontier Science and Technology, First Edition. Citation Paper Author. Eleventh Annual Meeting of the Biofeedback Society of America, Colorado Springs, Colorado, 1980. Biofeedback Society of America Scholar, 1979. Co-author, USVA Grant, “Variables Affecting the Experience of Pain in Migraine,” USVA Medical Center, Northport, New York, 1977-1979. Biomedical Research Fellow, Department of Biomedical Engineering, SUNY at Stony Brook, Stony Brook, New York, 1978. NIMH Predoctoral Fellowship, 1976. BA, Magna cum laude, with Honors in Psychology, 1974. Danforth Fellowship Nominee, Illinois Wesleyan University, Bloomington, Illinois, 1973.

Past/Present Clients
Most of my clients are my private patients. However I have provided many seminars, lectures and workshops for: Columbia University. The Mount Sinai School of Medicine. The Metropolitan Museum of Art. The Museum of Natural History. The UJA Federation. The university, CW Post. The College of New Rochelle. Equinox Fitness. Travelers Insurance. AutoOne Insurance. Chubb Insurance. Metropolitan Life. Allstate Insurance. State Farm Insurance. Encompass Insurance. The public relations firm, Porter Novelli. The investment firm, Capital Re:. The Estee Lauder corporation. The law firm of Irwin Abrams. The National Insurance Crime Bureau. GEICO Insruance. Beth Israel Hospital.

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