Psychiatry & Psychology--General/dependent personality disorder
hi! I've been diagnosed with dependent personality disorder.
I've been this way all of my life and now I am age 40. I didn't realize this was wrong with me until my new doctor told me.
Plus I started to realize it when my mother became sick and had to move away. I didn't have normal grief.. I felt like I lost my mommy. Also my dependency shifted to my husband when my mother had to go in the nursing home. I'm also very very scared when I wake up in the morning and my husband is gone to work and I am all alone. I also feel frightened to spend more than 4 hrs alone at home. I was wondering if you could suggest some exercises to help me gain autonomy. I see a therapist 1/2 hour every 2-3 weeks. Right now we are working on getting used to spending longer periods alone..and I also put positive affirmations on my mp3 player to play over and over in the evening for sometime up to 2 hrs.
Anyway, I was wondering if you could explain the beast that I'm up against so I can defeat it. Perhaps you have some minor suggestions / tips for me to do in addition to therapy work. I told her I was going to send this message to you and she doesn't have a problem with it.
Hi, Linda, well, I know nothing about you and will not assume that you have this kind of problem. However, you can look up 'personality disorder' on the internet, such as here-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personality_disorder
. You can also find information on DPD, such as here-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dependent_personality_disorder
Persons suffering from PD's have changes to their thinking, emotions, behaviors, and interpersonal relationships. Everyone has a personality, a way of interacting with the world; it only becomes a disorder when that pattern is dysfunctional and interferes with one's life.
I cannot say if you have this problem but, if it is, one symptom is asking other people for advice - just like you are doing here. IOW, I'm not sure I know of any exercises that can have someone 'start' to be independent, or a way to ease-in to being independent.
For any single decision, one either depends on oneself or depends on others. When one makes a decision, one risks failure. Or one can minimize that risk by depending on another person.
When I do therapy, I use a car analogy. When a car's wheels are out of alignment, the car will always pull to the right. The only way to drive straight is to turn the steering wheel to the left. People are the same way; you may have to act in ways that seem very unnatural and uncomfortable, just to act what other people would consider to be normal.