Psychiatry & Psychology--General/phobia of marriage


Is there such a phobia for marriage?
Its like this: suppose i had a job that pays 450 USD a month(which would already be luck of me in our country) and i hav 3 to 4 kids,all of them schooling, 2 in college. and if each college pays 180 bucks per mo, how do i sustain a family when i have to build them a house and other expenses whn i am the breadwinner? It doesn't just mathematically add you get my problem? Does medication have anything to do with these since i'm a bipolar? When i was still i mania, my energy levels and positive thinking were high and i didn't have to think of this and i thoght i overcame this.but now im taking meds this problem comes up, this being the second time. its really irritating. how do i get rid of this? do help..thanks.

There can be a phobia for anything, Nordz, but what you describe sounds less phobic and more realistic. Fearing a runaway car heading for you doesn't mean you're phobic about cars. As for getting rid of whatever it is, here are three comments for what they're worth.

-There's no law that says you have to marry at all. Many people lead happy and fulfilled lives while remaining single.

-If you ever decide you want to marry, you can do so later in life. This would give you more time to deal with the bipolar issue, and would allow you to build up substantial savings.

-Yes, kids are costly. But the first step would be marriage, and the next one would be evidence that it's a successful and stable one. Then you can decide to have no children or one only. Maybe two if everything is good. Many people would find it difficult to do right by three or four.

Thank you for asking us, and I hope those thoughts will be somewhat useful to you. The best of luck to you, whatever you decide.


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Alan Auerbach


Taught psychology for 30 years, authored four textbooks. Specialize in introductory and industrial/organizational psychology, but will tackle wider range of areas.

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