Psychiatry & Psychology--General/Loss of interest in life
I am 46 years old and recently I had a surgery on my face, which didnīt end successful.
The surgeon made a mistake during the operation and I didnīt have any follow ups during the post-op.
Two weeks later when he was back, he just took the stitches, said everything was normal and sent me home, even though I had an asymmetrical face.
I can tell you that after this surgery and with its result and all related, my life just came to an end.
I stopped being the person I used to be, I lost my interest for life. I had to leave work for sometime for this operation and the plan was to go back to work after six months. Itīs been almost two years now and I still have the symptoms previous to the operation, plus others as consequences to the cuts.
I simply lost control of everything and donīt know what to do . In response to my questions, the doctors gave me the most stupid excuses to explain what occurred, and didnīt me convince of anything.
To make things worse, the doctors are dumping all the fault on me, as if I had done something wrong during the post-op. Itīs killing me slowly, and Iīm losing the strength to fight for my life.
I then sewed the doctors for all the troubles they put me in, but it doesnīt solve the problem.
I have already talked to other doctors and they confirmed all the problems Iīm facing and added, itīs not recommendable to undergo another surgery, for the risks involved.
I used to be a happy person, full of life, I did a lot of things and was loved by my family and friends. I used to make plans, used to dream about a lot of things, but now nothing matters anymore.
As Iīm far from work, I have no money to seek help in Psychology and Psychiatry.
I feel Iīm getting worse every day and sometimes I wonder if I am dead already, but insisting in being around. I think itīs just a way to deny what really happened, as I donīt want to believe in it.
My family seems to ignore how serious my mental health has been affected, and inside myself.
Iīm afraid I will never more be the same person I used to. There has been too much damage to my self-esteem and I just feel I lost the battle for life.
I hope you can give some kind of comfort, even from far.
Thank you so much
You really need to get some regular support, if not from a counselor, then from others in your community, perhaps through membership in a sports group or a church group or a local community group. You can reestablish your self-esteem by volunteering to help other, perhaps in a hospital or nursing home or orphanage or school. The important thing now is to force yourself to be around people. Some may not be nice to you because of things, but you'll eventually get rid of those people and find a group that will support you. That will establish your self-esteem. I realize this is not easy, but it IS a way to have a fulfilling life.