I don't know really what to write but I know I need some advice. I am a 25 year old female who has suffered from most things you listed in your expertise description. My main issues revolve around my depression and mainly my anxiety. My childhood was full of abuse and family violence, I am a survivor of rape on two occasions, and have suffered from severe insomnia on and off throughout my life. Overall I have been doing pretty good the past year mainly thanks to my new boyfriend. My issue is that I don't know how to deal with my anxiety and I end up being unnecessarily rude/mean to him. Typically I believe that I am in the right until I calm down so it just makes it worse during the moment. He understands that "my anger" is anxiety based but I don't know how long he will put up with it. I don't know how to change my reaction to stress and I am especially nervous because I am hoping to go graduate school soon (which I know will just be a lot of added stress). I have coping mechanisms that counselors in the past have come up with (examples include stress ball, going for a walk outside, having a mantra, exercising) but as I said I don't always realize how stressed I am/how much I am over-reacting until afterward. Do you have any suggestions on how to cope before I push my boyfriend too far away?
Thanks for any help!
Answer Talk with him about your past trauma and abuse (if he is supportive) and ask him: "What would help you most when I a get angry because of the abuse I suffered in the past?"
Healing takes time and determination. You may need to be in therapy in order to get support for further healing.
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