Psychiatry & Psychology--General/Co-dependency issues


My girlfriend, who has been diagnosed with and receiving treatment for C-PTSD, broke up with me last week. According to her, the reason for the breakup is that she has noticed I have got dependency/co-dependency issues (even though she has no formal education or training in psychology she has a habit of analysing everyone around her). On couple of previous occasions she tried to break off the relationship for reasons that are not true to the best of my knowledge.
My questions are;
1. Is it possible to have a romantic relationship with a person who has got C-PTSD?

2.Her allegation that I have got dependency/co-dependency issues has got me worried. I have a successful career and an active social life and no one else has alleged that I have dependency issue to date. How do I know whether I have got dependency/co-dependency issues?

Dear Charminda,

Only a qualified mental health diagnostician can determine whether someone suffers from Dependent Personality Disorder ("codependency") and this, following lengthy tests and personal interviews.

These may be of help - click on the links:

Regarding your first question:

These may be of help - click on the links:

How Victims are Affected by Abuse

How Victims are Affected by Abuse - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Traumas as Social Interactions

How Victims are Affected by Abuse - Recovery and Healing

The Narcissist's Victims

Victim Reactions to Abuse by Narcissists and Psychopaths

Mourning the Narcissist

The Three Forms of Closure

Back to La-la Land

The Spouse/Mate/Partner of the Narcissist

Divorcing the Narcissist and the Narcissistic Psychopath - How Do I Get Rid of Him?

Rescue Fantasies - Surviving the Narcissist

The Malignant Optimism of the Abused

The Inverted Narcissist - Codependence and Relationships with Abusive

Codependence and the Dependent Personality Disorder

The Dependent Patient - A Case Study

Danse Macabre - Trauma bonding and the Stockholm Syndrome

The Cult of the Narcissist

Narcissists and Personality disordered Mates, Spouses, and Partners

Projection and Projective Identification - Abuser in Denial

Approach-Avoidance Repetition Complex and Fear of Intimacy

Guilt? What guilt?

Narcissists, psychopaths, sex, and marital fidelity

The Narcissist or Psychopath Hates your Independence and Personal Autonomy

I miss him so much - I want him back!

Participate in discussions about Abusive Relationships - click on these

The Narcissistic Abuse Study List

The Toxic Relationships Study List

Abusive Relationships Newsletter

Take care.

Sam (Narcissists, Psychopaths, Abuse) (Sam Vaknin's Media Kit and Press Room) (World in Conflict and Transition) (Sayings of Wisdom and Inanity) (Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited)

Psychiatry & Psychology--General

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Sam Vaknin, Ph.D.


Personality disorders. I have collaborated with Israeli psychologists and criminologists in the study of personality disorders and am the author of "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" (available from Barnes and Noble and as an e-book from my publisher). My expertise is: the Narcissistic Personality Disorder and pathological narcissism.


I am the author of Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited. (number 1 bestseller in its category in Barnes and Noble). The Web site "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" was, for many years, an Open Directory Cool Site and a Psych-UK recommended Site. I am not a mental health professional though I am certified in psychological counseling techniques by Brainbench. I served as the editor of Mental Health Disorders categories in the Open Directory Project and on I have my own websites about the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and about relationships with abusive narcissists here and in HealthyPlace. You can read my work on many other Web sites: Mental Health Matters, Mental Health Sanctuary, Mental Health Today, Kathi's Mental Health Review and others. I also served as the author of the Personality Disorders topic, Narcissistic Personality Disorder topic, the Verbal and Emotional Abuse topic, and the Spousal Abuse and Domestic Violence topic, all four on Suite101, as well as the moderator of the Narcissistic Abuse Study List , the Toxic Relationships Study List, and other mailing lists (c. 7000 members). I wrote a column for Bellaonline on Narcissism and Abusive Relationships.

"Managing Investment Portfolios in States of Uncertainty", Limon Publishers, Tel-Aviv, 1988 "The Gambling Industry", Limon Publishers, Tel-Aviv, 1990 "Requesting My Loved One: Short Stories", Miskal-Yedioth Aharonot, Tel-Aviv, 1997 "The Suffering of Being Kafka” (electronic book of Hebrew and English Short Fiction), Prague, 1998-2004 "The Macedonian Economy at a Crossroads – On the Way to a Healthier Economy" (dialogues with Nikola Gruevski), Skopje, 1998 "The Exporter’s Pocketbook" Ministry of Trade, Republic of Macedonia, Skopje, 1999 "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited", Narcissus Publications, Prague, 1999-2007 (Read excerpts - click here) The Narcissism, Psychopathy, and Abuse in Relationships Series (E-books regarding relationships with abusive narcissists and psychopaths), Prague, 1999-2010 Personality Disorders Revisited (e-book about personality disorders), Prague, 2007 "After the Rain – How the West Lost the East", Narcissus Publications in association with Central Europe Review/CEENMI, Prague and Skopje, 2000 More than 30 e-books about psychology, international affairs, business and economics, philosophy, short fiction, and reference (free download here) Winner of numerous awards, among them Israel's Council of Culture and Art Prize for Maiden Prose (1997), The Rotary Club Award for Social Studies (1976), and the Bilateral Relations Studies Award of the American Embassy in Israel (1978). Hundreds of professional articles in all fields of finance and economics, and numerous articles dealing with geopolitical and political economic issues published in both print and Web periodicals in many countries. Many appearances in the electronic and print media on subjects in psychology, philosophy, and the sciences, and concerning economic matters.

1970-1978: Completed nine semesters in the Technion – Israel Institute of Technology, Haifa. 1982-3: Ph.D. in Philosophy (dissertation: "Time Asymmetry Revisited") – California Miramar University (formerly: Pacific Western University), California, USA. 1982-5: Graduate of numerous courses in Finance Theory and International Trading in the UK and USA. Certified E-Commerce Concepts Analyst by Brainbench. Certified in Psychological Counselling Techniques by Brainbench. Certified Financial Analyst by Brainbench. Full proficiency in Hebrew and in English.

Awards and Honors
Winner of numerous awards, among them Israel's Council of Culture and Art Prize for Maiden Prose (1997), The Rotary Club Award for Social Studies (1976), and the Bilateral Relations Studies Award of the American Embassy in Israel (1978).

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