Psychics/Healing abilities and redeveloping empathy
QUESTION: Thank you so much for your time :)
There are two related but different things I'd like to ask about - empathy and healing. There's a little background required though, so sorry for all the writing.
My whole life, starting when I was three years old, I have had a gift (I don't know what else to call it) for massage. My mother has a lot of back and joint problems, so I grew up trying to help her as often as I could. She says I have 'healing hands' - when I work, and am doing the right thing for the person, my hands get weirdly warm - not from friction or use, but from within them. I've gotten to the point where I... I look at people, see the way they hold themselves and how they describe what's wrong, and it's like the muscles light up under their skin like a puzzle. All I have to do is turn this this way, push here, hold, and... they're all better.
That's not psychic, I know, but when I was more in touch with my mind I was working a lot with energy in my palms - sensing energy in people and plants, sending it, healing that way in addition to massage. So my first question - am I crazy, or is this actually a thing? Energy in my palms?
Second question regards a loss of ability. In addition to massage, I had incredible amounts of empathy until around 13 years old. I'm not entirely sure what caused them to leave, but I know I'm far more jaded and cynical than I used to be, and I want to know if there are any things I can do to redevelop my empathy and kindness - I feel that if I have any potential healing abilities, they will come first after I fix this.
Another loss of ability thing - for a while I pursued spirituality, meditation, healing - all those types of things, trying to be more aware of myself, and able to help others better. It went very well for a while, but like my empathy, seems to have packed up and left when I wasn't looking. I feel like any higher awareness is suddenly shut off behind a door in my mind.
Long story short: I want to help people. I feel like I might be able to develop healing abilities in some way if I really work at it, but I feel I've lost a lot of the ability I once had, and I'm not sure how to get it back, OR if I ever had anything at all.
Thank you for helping all of us :)
ANSWER: Your experience with healing is actually a very common description by all of the instinctive psychic healers I know, so it's not unique or unusual (for what it is).
When we hit our teen years, this generally causes our abilities to go completely haywire, and they may not stabilize until sometime between age 17 and 20. Abilities may strengthen, new ones may emerge, and some may disappear. It's a very chaotic time. This is all most likely due to the hormonal shifts and final growth period of the brain.
There are also a lot of aggressive psi folks out there, and a person whose abilities are going haywire and who has no shielding looks like a vulnerable target. So, I see a lot of folks who have been attacked in some way, and don't realize it. Blocking, energy system damage, etc, can all cause loss of ability. Sometimes the solution to that doesn't take long--there might be some energy construct lodged in your energy systems, and removing it may fix the issue. I would recommend looking into energy manipulation and cleansing, and check yourself for blocks.
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QUESTION: That's so exciting, to think that I might actually be capable of something, and not just deluding myself into believing so.
You say 'shielding' though - what is shielding? Would something be attacking me? I'm not familiar with the term.
Although most people use visualization for energy manipulation, and visualize a force field or barrier, shielding is basically an interference pattern in your aura that prevents things from passing through into your energy system.
Without any defenses at all, you might attract all sorts of things. You can find information on energy working basics and shielding in the articles section on www.psionguild.org