QUESTION: Hello Nancy, I would like to know if my boyfriend, who moved to another country, the U.S A, will meet someone else soon and forget about me or does he still have feelings for me. P.S I live in Brazil.
ANSWER: Hi, Claudia,
I think he still has feelings for you, and I don't see him meeting someone else in the near future. It feels like the relationship sort of hit an end point when he moved, and there wasn't much closure or clarity, especially for you. He seems like a guy who really isn't sure how to be in a relationship and didn't want to hurt you. If there is unfinished business between you and you feel he would be open to hearing from you, I would suggest reaching out.
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Hi Nancy, I am amazed at how you hit the right spot, he really isn´t sure how to be in a relationship, he never admitted to being in a committed relationship with me or with his former girlfriend. He has some childhood issues. What kind of question should I ask him? Should I be direct? He told me he loved me for the first time the day he left. Also, he has some childhood issues. If I give you his full name will it help? Thank you
Thanks for the feedback! Telling you he loves you for the first time on the day he leaves the country actually gives you the perfect reason to follow up. (Keep in mind also that his timing for saying this indicates his level of fear — of hurting you and/or getting hurt himself. Relationships are hazardous territory for him.) You could share how you felt when he said he loved you, and how you feel about him. That could open the door for a conversation about how each of you sees the relationship now and what you'd like to see happen from this point on. The key, I think, is not to grill him about his intentions, but to express your own feelings — which of course include you caring for him and wanting him to be happy.
You don't say how old he is but his energy feels young to me. It can take a while to sort out issues from childhood, especially for a man finding his way as a young adult. And it's something only he can do. So be kind to yourself and trust your own intuition as you navigate this.