QUESTION: hi Shariananda i need your help. Every since i found out i was pregnant i have been stressed,depressed and scared. The pregnancy was not planned, i'm no longer with the guy, i have a 2 year old daughter already with another guy and i'm just not ready for a new baby. I haven't told anyone but i'm pretty sure they'll see soon because i started showing now. I just want to know where do i go from here, how will things be once i have the baby? will i be able to come up with the funds to provide for the baby i'm scared and want to know what's going to happened next.
My date of birth is October 3 1993
born in Birmingham Al but live in Montgomery Al
ANSWER: Marsha-- The life you bear is a blessing, and you are no different than Mother Mary,Jesus' mom.She had a child and didn't even know who the father was. Then she had several other sons with Joseph,and they didn't exactly show up for Jesus. But she kept the faith and trusted God had a plan for her and him. Get ready to be stronger, better, more. You are a woman challenged for a reason.
It is a tough spot to be in, for you have made a child again before you were ready. Who has helped you up to now? Have you a minister? Have you social worker? Have you considered contacting an adoption agency? Also, you need to find a woman's group that can help you have child care and test you for aptitude for a career in It or Finance or Administration, Medicine, law....Call your One Stop Job Center today. Get on track to make a new life for yourself--pregnant or not.
You will live, and you will learn. Now is the time to reach out for help. I am too far away to be of any practical aid to you, but heed what I say, hanging back and doing nothing as the baby grows bigger will only stress that child, but also add to your stress and fear. Make a decision today. Tell whom you can trust and ask for help.
You do not have the luxury of shame or self-hate. You are not the first woman to have children by different men. That is no sin; it is a error of heart. You loved both guys, and the heart can be a terrible master. Let yourself off the hook for guilt.
Don't cry, gather your true strength. Hold you head up--not proudly, but so you can see your way ahead. Now, say the Lord's Prayer or the 23rd Psalm and step into the Light--you will be okay. God will not let you down. Say those prayers every day until you are out of the woods. I am lighting a candle for you today and you can know I am here praying for you,too. Shariananda
Please follow me on Facebook as Shariananda Borregaard Adamz. And watch my videos each week on www.bricksite.com/shariananda
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Thanks Shariananda for your kind words.Sorry for the late reply.
Up to now mostly my mom helps me with everything and a little help from my other siblings. (sisters) I did "think" about an adoption agency but now i'm slowly coming along and starting to feel excited about giving birth for the second time. I am going to do whatever it takes to better myself so i can give my kids whatever it is they need. I'm still trying to take it all in but i think i'm ready.These last years I've been dealing with a lot of things and I've notice that i'm changing for the better;even though i wasn't ready for none of these changes, i'm dealing and living.and you are right i am living and i am learning. Shariananda if i may ask can you tell me what the outcome will be like? After i give birth what's next for me? I'm planning on going back to school after the baby and finding a job as well. & what can you tell me about the fathers of my children? First child's father dob is December 2 1992 and new baby's father June 23. will i have any help from them? Any new love coming my way anytime soon?
Hello Marsha, (may the peace and path you are walking unfold so as to dazzle you with wonder)
You are right; it has been a while--since May.
I am happy to know you are making progress. That you are optimistic and have a plan.
If you are sure of that plan, then you do not need a reading, but just a little coaching.
So I will draw you three cards. Past. Present. Future.
But keep in mind, you are only allowed to write one question at a time. I am making an exception because I understand your need. But I am going to ask, about your children's future and your stability. New love will not be the thing for you to focus on now.
Your children need you to focus on them. Love is what,after all, got you into this mess.
And if you, will learn from your mistakes, you will mature a bit more.
I realize you feel alone, confused and overwhelmed,but you are not without the resources of heaven.
I hope you are still saying the Lord's Prayer and the 23rd Psalm daily.
Have you found help from women's and social agencies? If not, keep trying--there are so many young mom and support agencies online and in the various family services agencies. Seek them,seek them!
Life is a series of connections. So your outcomes will be only as satisfying as your outreach.
So, take one step at a time. Have the new baby. Name it. Come home, nurse it. Watch your other child. Give it love and a share in the responsibility--like holding the bottle or pouring the milk in the bottle. Make that child a part of this little family so as not to alienate.Watch TV for messages about childcare, education, agencies. Listen to the radio for music lightens the heart, creates optimism. Just do your days. If your mom or others want to help, accept that. No shame, no blame, just moving forward. That is how it works for all of us.
Day by day do what is yours to do, and each day make one effort to better yourself--like make a phone call, or ask someone for help, or take the children--born and unborn--to the library for a day of reading. The more you get out and do positive things, the more likely you will meet someone who can aid or support you or while being out, you may discover a new and provident path. It can't happen if you just wonder and fear. Do something each day.
As for your children's fathers--Both of them are shady in my estimation. The first one, father of your first child has moved on and will maybe make another appearance in 8 years.(unless he's been around until your child turned 8). He drinks and does drugs, and he is unsettled. He won't be of any help, and you should just bless him and forgive him. The other guy is a wander and a flirt, but he may want to meet his child in time, about a year and a half. These are their cards:8 Cups and Moon. I don't think you will want to re-engage with them, but maybe their mothers would like to see their grand kids. Why not put out feelers for how they feel?
Now for your cards:Past--shows Knight Pentacles--He is seated wearing a royal brown cloak and a golden helmet. His seat is a large pentacle, a symbol for money. It suggests you have the right spiritual attitude in the past, maybe not a good and strong partner(because he is seated when he dressed for success)and he is slow to rise and take on the future and as your partner. He is only window dressing--good to look at but an empty promise. So in the past, you have been lured by an image and false promises. Those days are over.(You have arrived at your realization of your potential.)
Present--The Queen of Wands--here we have a powerful woman of color dressed in red with a feather in her hair, a berry tree before her and a small white cat at her feet. She stands poised to do something using nature and it's denizens. This tells me that the little ones(cat) have a good mother, and she is strong along. She has right in front of her lots of fruit(berries) to pick from the tree of life. Marsha, you have possibility all around you, just go for it now. You are stronger than you know. School. Work. The children--you have the stamina. The staff or wand is a weapon, a support, a magic wand and a pointer. Show yourself the way. You have the comfort of knowing you will live and the fire and power within you(red) will take you where you intend to go. Claim your power and take your steps here now in the present.Oh, the feather represents the prayers to heaven and the connection to your higher power. Believe in your ability to take it a day at a time. You are on journey.
Future: The cards shows a man on a high mound with a sword resting on his shoulder. Down on the flat ground two figures, huddled in hooded clothing move away as if in shame. On the ground are their two swords, as if they have been vanquished, driven away, pushed off the mountain. This validates what I said about your two men, the fathers of your children, they have been consigned to the past. They are no good for your life, and they have done you no good (the children yes--help and responsibility--no). You are represented by the man on the hill, raised above the trial of conflict and disappointment. You have the higher view and can now, turn and begin the work of tending the lands of your life which include the children and your own empowerment.
In the next three months (and over the next three years)--you will have three chances for more income--perhaps a student scholarship or grant, a grocery store job or store clerk, or an appointment by a social agency. Consider working for a vet and going to veterinary school. You can find scholarships for that. Google grants for veternary. What ever, you are on your way to greater support--this I am told by Three Pentacles--where a farmer kneels and raises three pentacles(money and prosperity) with a trowel.
It is a card that fell from the deck as a special notice to you. That's what will happen for you and that is the situation. You only need to take a step at a time, do a small effort toward your own betterment and the welfare of the children daily. I hope this helps, my dear. I bless you to your own strength and trust. Fear not--Our father who art in heaven has not abandoned you, but is making you know His power within you. I am His messenger for your life.