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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Marriage > Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship > my husband isn't nice to me like he is to other people
Expert: Graham Smith B.PHIL
Date: 5/16/2008
Subject: my husband isn't nice to me like he is to other people
Question
For 14 years our marriage was wonderful. Then my husband had heart
surgery. He became very verbally abusive to me. I have tried in the past 4
years to make my marriage work. Then 2 nights ago I was moving in my sleep
and he punched me so hard because I was disturbing his sleep. We have been
to marriage counselors and still nothing has changed He says he is nice to
other people because I don't give him reason to be nice or want to spend
time with me. If I leave my husband I would have to move back to my home
state and my son who is 16 would not want to go. Should I stay here for 2
more years waiting for my son to finish high school. or should I pack it in. I
am so depressed and can't take much more. I am very lonely and sad. Please
offer me some solution if you can. Thank you
Answer
hiya
your hubby may have heart problems,but this runs deeper than that, it seems that he is taking his frustration and anger out on you. I know you have visited the marriage counselors and found them to be next to useless;now i would write down all the good times you have had together, and write down if you can, where he started to be unkind and nasty to you. Then read them out to him, tell how you feel,show him how you feel. if after this he can't see his error,then you have to make that decision that you feel you may need to get your life back. if all is so lost you can't really wait till your son leaves his education because your state of mind is your first concern. Please, work on all avenues before you do make any decision.
hope this has helped
graham
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