Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/Ignoring Husband

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Question
Am a 28 yrs old married woman. I got married 6 yrs back and it was a Love marriage. My husband's age is 36. I have a 5 year old daughter. The problem here is after our daughter was born the distance between me and my husband has increased too much. I am a working professional. After my daughter was born it was much difficult for me to manager work, home and my kid. So i had to relocate to my parents place so that i could get some support from them. In this journey, me and my husband were almost stayed away from each other 3yrs as my husband could not find a better job. Now from past 1 year we are together but their is no understanding between each other. He doesnot care to spend time with us after coming from office. He will be always busy watching Movies in TV, too much addicted to TV. Never cares for anyone and self centered and only thinks about himself. I feel very lonely as i do not have any one to share my feelings. He does not take us any where out not even to Park for my daughter. During weekend he just wants to sit at home and watch TV from morning to evening , he does not even open his mouth and does not want to discuss anything. Its been very annoying for me seeing all this. I have started hating him and do not like to see his face at home. After i come from office i would just cook the food and keep it, he remembers me only if there is no food in the kitchen. I do not want to waste my rest of life with this person as he is too much superstitious and keeps saying at the age of 38 he will die according to horoscope and i do not believe in all those.Even Sexually am not happy as he has a thinking that it should be done only twice a month. I feel i should get apart from him as there is no minimal attachment for him towards me. He will not put leave any day to office. Always worried about office and family is nothing to him. Looking at others who are married around me i feel very bad that i chose a wrong person in my life who does not care for me anymore. Every day am going to depression whenever i think of him .Please suggest how to deal this.

Answer
Hey Teju,

Thanks for writing in and dropping a word. It takes a lot to open up about issues in the back of the mind and when its related to our heart, it takes guts to pen down left alone talk with someone about the same. I appreciate your gesture in pouring your heart felt emotions and seeking a helping hand for the same. Kudos to you !!!

Well I can very well understand what you must be going through and trust me the way you have described, I can feel the pain you experiencing every day. It's worst when a lady gives her best in marriage and makes sure everyone around her is happy, is neglected by her husband and is ill treated . Add to that when a man can't even sexually satisfy a lady, it's indeed miserable life. You are human who deserves the right to live, enjoy life and also have the right pleasure to satisfy your physical needs , as its natural desire of body. You should stand up and raise your voice once and let him and his family know what you going through. You should stick to firm stand once you make and let him abide by that. deprive him of physical pleasures and make him realize that to touch you, he needs to respect you as a wife and give proper care.

For me to help you better, I would suggest you to drop me a mail and tell me in detail more about things, so that I can tell you how to make him realize his faults and respect you.

Just go out and give your best and  things would fall in place...

All the best !!

Cheers,
Relationship Counsellor
Bringing smiles on the faces on the way .....

P.S- For more professional help around your subject, you can drop a word at, (relationships.counsellor@gmail.com)

Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship

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I am quite experienced and matured enough to handle questions related to following topics: 1) Love- Friendship 2) Issues in all kinds of relationships. 3) making a relationship work. 4) Effective tips to sustain a relationship. 5) Sex related queries. Well as of now haven't come across any such questions, which would offend me or I lack expertise in, but am a straight forward person and doesn't hold my wordings back. I don't mind being honest in case I lack knowledge about particular aspect and quite flexible to accept genuine views of others or seek other professionals for my case studies, to help the clients out.

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I am a qualified software engineer with Bachelor's degree of Engineering i.e B.Tech degree in area of Electronics and Telecommunications. I am pursuing PG diploma in area of counseling and relationship education from Delhi University, India.

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