Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/Help


Dear Vani Ma'am,

Please help me. I want your advice and suggestions.

I am 24 years old. I live with my family. We are three siblings. I have two sisters. One is married and the other is single(27 Years). I live with my parents and a sister. I love a girl so much. She also loves me. We are in love for last one and a half year. She is ready to do anything for me. She is 14 years senior to me. She is 36 years old. She has a 10 years old son. She is seperated since last 4 years. Her husband gave divorce to her because he did not like her. She is a Christian and I am Hindu. She is a teacher.

I have tried my best to convince my parents for our marriage but they are not ready to accept her. She is ready to do everything for my family and for me. First, my family had an objection with her son but for me she convinced her parents to keep her son with them(her parents). She loves her son so much. Her parents are ready to keep her son with them. Her parents do not have any son. They have two only daughters. The other daughter is married.

I am the youngest child in my family and only son of my parents. So they have given me lots of love. They expected a lot from me. I have a very good repitition in our society. My parents are not ready to listen about my love. They want me to get married in our caste. My parents has done a lot of sacrifice for me. Our financial condition was not so good but still they all worked hard for my study. They worked day and night to give me good education. They all gave me lots of love. But they are not ready to listen about my love. I have examined her(my love) a lot but I found no fault in her. She has not any bad intention.She purely loves me. Her love is pure. She wants to give everything to me and expect a little love from me. She wants to spend her life as my wife. She wants me to support everyway. She earns much more than me. But I have never seen proud in her eyes. She wants to support and wants to take care of my family.

My parents do not believe in her. They are not ready to even talk to her.

I am not ready to get married anyone else. I can't. I love her so much. We have lived like a husband-wife during last one and a half years. She always obeyed me like a wife does.

I am very confused. Please help me. What should I do ?

My Email ID is

Please reply as soon as possible.

Thank You Very Much.

Hi Manas,

Your case is a bit different from a normal boy meets girl and falls in love story. Your family will never agree to this marriage. So you will have to come to terms with that. Yes, it may also affect the marriage prospects of your sister, since we live in a conservative society. So let your sister get married, till then earn and save some money. At the same time, stop forcing your parents to agree to this relationship. You believe that she is your soul mate then go right ahead and marry her. Be ready to bear all consequences and societal pressures. She is ready to give up her son for you, why can't you give up your family?  



Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship

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Marriages are made in heaven! But in love marriages when the two partners belong to different nations, castes, races, social strata, backgrounds, the amount of understanding required is more. I can tackle queries related to love marriages of these kinds. Sorry, I cannot help out on gay and lesbian relationships and am neither a sex therapist nor an astrologer.


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