Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/not sure


heey there , hope you could answer my question
my dad had married a women before my mom that was at the age 6-8 years he wasnt ready for it . the people means my family forced him to do it . and then he ran away with my mom and got married after a year the same people the one my father got married came to my father for asking the property that the great grandpa has given them which is 16 acres ( after the marriage my great grandpa , he is grandpa for my dad and that women too had given the whole property onto my fathers name and said after marriage they could share it ) the people threatened my father for the whole property my father gave them everything for them to not come back . and now that i was born am 16 yrs now my dad is again having an affair with that women for a couple of yrs and that women is pregnant now but we don't know the baby is my dads or not when my mom or me asked he used say its his but when my mom said to check he refuses and threats her very badly  . i told my mom to stay away from him we can stay !
on our own . but she says we have nothing to stay on our own. my dad is an engineer and is working in Kuwait .. his attitude towards us changes once he does be sweet but otherwise he will very angry and simply for no reason he screams at us i don't know how do help my mom she keeps crying every single day and asks me to do something ... please help me please tell how do i help her please

Hi Grace,
I'm sorry to hear about your situation; it sounds very difficult. Unfortunately your mom really only has two choices: 1) stay and put up with it. Can she find other friends to spend time with and support her? or 2) leave. She will need support for this too. Are there welfare agencies in your country that could provide support? Do you have friends or other family members who could help financially or with somewhere to stay? Anyone local she can talk to you?
Unfortunately, it sounds like your father has a personality problem and I think you should not expect that he will change.
Personally I don't think you should put up with it as it is clearly making you all unhappy. Anything your mom can do to give herself some space away from him (even temporarily) can make a big difference.
Good on you for being concerned enough to write to me and I wish you all the best.


Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship

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Liam Naden


I specialise in helping couples save their marriage and rebuild it after major hurts such as an affair. Creating intimacy, removing hurt, dealing with sexual and communication problems. I have two relationship-saver programs and a free podcast which are available from my website and a free report, "The Five Keys to Saving Your Marriage Now" at


Relationship coach with own relationship coaching business. Author of several books on marriage and intimacy. I offer two relationship saving programs: "Stop Your Divorce" and "Save Your Marriage" which have helped many couples save their marriage and rebuild their love and intimacy.

Publications Amazon Kindle: Author of the ""Growing in Love for Life" series of ebooks for saving and strengthening marriage.

Master of Arts (First Class Honors)

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