Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/Wife doesnt show love


Its been more than 6 yrs. of marriage. My wife and I have always been a bit different, but its really difficult in terms of how she becomes if I dont pursue her. She is totally not bothered about my being around, she lives in her own world, which is doing her job, watching her favorite show, spending time with our son and then sleep. I wonder she has any affection for me. When we are in the car and I'm driving, I always try to look at her and speak while she wouldnt even look at me when talking. If I dont initiate a topic she just keeps looking outside and in her own "zone" as if I am one person she is totally not concerned about. The same goes around in house, if I dont initiate a conversation, she doesnt even look. sometimes, i have to tell her that i feel its a bit rude that you dont speak at all. As for physical intimacy, we have had so many arguments because she is never 'ready'. I am fully committed to this relationship and always ready to work my butt off for the family. I never get any appreciation for that either nonetheless, i only get complaints most of the times on what i have not done properly. I am so tired mentally as it feels that i am the only one trying to keep this relationship alive


Here is something to try.   And this may sound like I am putting the blame on you.  I am not.  What you want is to get some affection from her.  Try giving her unsolicited affection.  Affection with out any expectations.   Affection is the small things we do every day all day to show we care.  It can be as simple as a smile when you first see some one.  Every day, several times a day, with gentle touches and kind words tell her, show her that you do care.  Use you imagination.  Things like " Good morning sweetheart",   With a smile and warm tone "How was your day?"  When you walk past let your finger tips softly touch her arm.   Those are the kinds of things that have impact on relationships.

The hope is that as you do these things she will warm to the affection and re engage in the relationship.  Do that for a month.  When she does re engage then talk with her about what she is interested in.  Then make an effort to be engaged in her areas of interests.  Don't try to be her just be willing to talk about things and support her in those activities.

Try that and see if you don't get some warming.

Good luck,

Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship

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Tom Blair


Questions related to strengthening and saving relationships and marriages. Sexual relationship questions. Published author.


Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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