Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/Is it cheating?
My wife met someone about a year ago whom she clearly likes, and has talked openly about their conversations. I recently learned that they went to dinner while I was out of town, and immedately made plans to meet again the following week. When I confronted her, she said nothing was going on and they were just friends. I want to share some articles on the warning signs of an emotional affair, which I'm concerned will make her angry. Am I wrong to say that meeting in secret means it's more than "just friends"?
If she made the plans behind your back w/o your basic knowledge and knowingly hid/kept this from you. Yes, it actually can be considered boarder line cheating. It's not right, and if she did this not once but twice, that's not a good thing. For some reason in your mind all of this is setting off alarm bells (and rightfully so), then your intuition is trying to tell you something here just isn't right, and your probably on the right tract to thinking she's up to know good.
You need to sit down with her and have a serious heart to heart talk with her. She needs to know how this affecting you and what you're willing and unwilling to put up with in this marriage. Talk to her about it and confront her with what you already know. It's never a good thing to hide something from your spouse, that's simply lying by omission and that's never okay. If she's not telling you about lunch/meeting up with him, then imagine what else she's keeping from you that you don't know about.
Talk to her and try to get to the bottom of this. Clearly she's got something going on with this man. And an emotional affair is often times way worse than an actual physical affair. When you share an emotional connection it can be much harder to break off and more detrimental to your marriage. Trust me, on this one, I speak from first hand experience and it's hard to get that trust back once it's broken. And you have to put a lot of time, energy and effort back into making the marriage work. It's tough, but it can be done as long as both parties are willing to do whatever it takes to make the marriage work. I hope this helps you some.