Marriage and the Husband-Wife Relationship/Self Centred Wife
I have been married for 33 years and for most of that time I have had to put up with my wife being (as I see it) self centred.
She has a daily routine of spending at least 2 hours showering and using various creams on her face, she starts this at around 10am which means that we never get out of the house to visit anywhere until after lunch, and I like to have a full day out, if I go anywhere on my own I get treated like a stranger for a week or two. I know that it is a subject for TV comedy but she is always late when we do go anywhere because she never knows what to wear! and when she does decide she has to ask me if she looks ok in what she is wearing which upsets me.
Writing this it seems almost trivial but it is a constant source of irritation for me, can you please help?
Some women are very self-conscience of what they wear, how they look, etc. Some women are very particular, to the point of almost being ridiculous. This is most likely going to be a very sensitive subject with her, so when/if you talk to her about this, try to be sensitive to her needs, within reason of course.
Try to sit down with her and have a heart to heart talk with her. She needs to know how this is affecting you and what you're willing and unwilling to put up with in, this marriage. Just as you're trying to be sensitive to her needs, she needs to do the same for you and respect that to you have things you'd like to do too. Life isn't always about ourselves, it's also about making sacrifices for our spouses and loved one too.
Talk to her about this and do it in a loving and concerned matter. Otherwise, she will take it as a personal attack on her. And she'll clam up and refuse to discuss this matter with you. Hopefully she'll be willing to listen to you and hear you out and you can both work on some sort of compromise that works for both of you.
You have a really good and valid point here. Maybe if you told her you think she's beautiful no matter how much time she takes or what she wears, that you love her regardless. I hope this helps you some.