AboutKim Expertise I am a survivor. I know what it’s like to be the victim. I am now a Sexual Assault Victim’s Care Advocate. I have been certified as such since November 2000. I am currently a student who is specializing in trauma and abuse and the associated disorders and illnesses.
Experience I am a survivor. So, I not only have book smarts but, personal experience with what rape is and how much it affects the victim and his or her loved ones.
Education/Credentials I am working on my Master's in Psychology specializing in trauma and abuse. I am in addition working on two associate degrees in Social Work and Women and Gender studies.
Question I am dating a girl I love soo much. But the problem is tha
she was RAPED WHILST VIRGIN by her fomer boyfriend after
which the boy started to cheat on her and hence the break
up.
Although she confess she loves me too, her sexual feelings
and desires is being cut off completely. Whenever we are
alone in a room all that playing romance, she continually
says "I DONT FEEL ANYTHING" So i questioned her and she said
that she always sees the image of the guy who raped her
whenever we are doing that and this put her off completely.
I WANT MY GIRL COME BACK TO HER FEELINGS. I WANT HER TO COME
TO NORMAL. I love her and we're going to get married soon.
Answer It’s normal to go through a feeling of un-feeling after rape. However, it could develop into a sexual dysfunction to where she is not able to recognize her sexual feelings. I would strongly encourage you to seek someone locally that can counsel your girlfriend, and I would also recommend sex therapy to help her work through her fears, and possible dysfunctions, so that in time she’ll be able to come back to you, herself and that she’ll be able to have a “normal” sexual life with you.
You may be able to find such help by checking with your hospital and or a clinic for women near you, also churches also can be helpful in counseling or helping you seek the right counsel for your friend in the area.
