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About Dr.Sunu Sundar
Expertise
I can answer questions from rape victims who are desperate to find a source for inner healing. All my answers will focus on soothing the victims of rape ultimately leading to inner healing.

Experience
I have been in counselling for last seven years. I have been counseling adults,teenagers and children who are abused and raped in various situations.

Education/Credentials
I have a master degree in Psychology and another in Sociology

 
   

You are here:  Experts > Health/Fitness > Mental Health > Rape Counseling > confused

Rape Counseling - confused


Expert: Dr.Sunu Sundar - 9/12/2009

Question
Thank God for this medium. Its a way to unburden my hrt. I'm 20 and attracted to a guy of 30 who seem to sincerely luv me. I didnt want sex untill marriage and i told him so. He tried touching me severe times and i rejected his advances. Touch and word of affirmation being my love language, i guess my willpower lessened with each approach. Then i could not fight back as he touched in ways hard to resist. When i was able to stop him and send him away, i feared it was too late. when i saw stains of blood and asked him, he said it was just a splash. I felt hurt. He later became my confidant and lover as he understood me better than any1. I told him i could not help feeling bad about losing my virginity. He begged and asked for fogiveness. Explaining that he wanted to gain my love and hrt by all means as i had a bf whom he knows i love. I fell for him but i can't fully understand if he raped me? why i can't get past my guilt. I love him but if i don't get it off my chest its going to come between us. Pls advise me sincerely

Answer
Dear Nelly,

In my opinion this is not a rape.  He  had sex with you when you are very much  unprepared  in heart to  allow this.Hence you feel guilty.

From now on strike  a policy with him saying 'Sex  only after marriage'

Pray to God  every day you will be healed. Your boy friend also must be a  lover and follower of Truth

Have  a nice day

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