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Rape Counseling/Questions Answered by Expert Kim
| Subject | Date Asked |
| boyfriend raped | 10/18/2010 |
| Q: Would a guy just tell you he had been raped by his best friend for two yr. with knowing him less ... A: Melody, I never assume that anyone is "making up" that they've been assaulted, and for men to come ... | |
| Losing control of myself | 10/15/2010 |
| Q: A few months ago I started dating a man. He was significantly older than me, which I should have saw ... A: First off some many things go through our heads after the fact that we may not consider or think of ... | |
| Is it normal for it to come back and haunt me? | 10/12/2010 |
| Q: Two years ago I went to visit my boyfriend who lived in another city at the time. We hadn't been ... A: Well, initially you were probably dealing with the shock, and you were likely dealing with RTS or ... | |
| I need help...and my depression is getting worst.... | 10/4/2010 |
| Q: My name is Irma. my questions is How can i get over the fact that I was raped long time ago yet my ... A: My guess is that your depression is getting worse, because maybe you are coming up on an anniversary ... | |
| Rape | 7/28/2010 |
| Q: I have a 10 year old cousin, her best friend is 11 years old, also a girl. my cousin told me that ... A: Larry, First I would report what you know to the school, and the authorities. I would also consider ... | |
| Help... | 7/27/2010 |
| Q: Um. I've never asked a question on here before but I need some help or advice. Recently, my ... A: You can’t help your reactions. It’s Ok to react as you did. Especially if you’ve had to deal with ... | |
| Anonymous Past | 7/26/2010 |
| Q: I have forgiven and tried to move on... but the question that keeps haunting me after almost 3 years ... A: This is a complicated story. I wonder did you ever receive professional psychological help- in the ... | |
| concern for a friend | 7/25/2010 |
| Q: When a friend of mine was younger he was raped. I've never been raped or even molested so I'm not ... A: Sounds like your friends is dealing with Depersonalization; which is common with victims of abuse. ... | |
| Rape and self injury | 7/6/2010 |
| Q: 8 yrs ago I was in a situation with a guy, I know. I find it hard to call it rape, as I blame myself ... A: Steff, I can understand not feeling comfortable talking face to face; it can be scary and very ... | |
| Trying to Recover from Date Rape | 6/30/2010 |
| Q: Kim. Thank you for taking the time to help me with my question. I was "date raped" two years ago ... A: I think that the self improvement is always great, but, I also believe that sometimes we have to ... | |
| raped? | 6/29/2010 |
| Q: Almost a year ago I was assaulted by a man I thought was friend. I had just been dumped by a long ... A: Ana, I think for me the thing that catches me here is that you told him that you were a committed ... | |
| I need help. | 6/23/2010 |
| Q: I am currently 18 years old. When I was 10 and 11 an older guy cousin of mine, who was babysitting ... A: Amanda, I am happy to talk with you, and help you in any way. However—I am in training and ... | |
| Boyfriend's reaction to telling him about rape before we met | 6/22/2010 |
| Q: I am 22 year old student and work abroad during holidays. I was attacked a year ago by a co-worker ... A: Deb, I think that it’s good that you told your boyfriend, I don’t think there’s any time that is a ... | |
| Girlfriends Rape | 6/21/2010 |
| Q: My Girlfriend was just raped by 2 men she met at a bar at the beach on June 17th. She does not ... A: If she had the rape kit, that's enough... there will be evidence even if we can't see it RIGHT now. ... | |
| Flashbacks | 6/20/2010 |
| Q: I'm 40 and I had a friend who I really trusted. We used to be married and we were still good ... A: Sam, See that’s part of the problem. Just stuffing it and “putting it back in the box”, makes you ... | |
| suprised | 6/18/2010 |
| Q: during a sexual encounter with an ex-boyfriend, he began to get to rough with me and was hurting me. ... A: Tiffany- If you didn't consent to that behavior it is still considered rape. At any point during ... | |
| Rape Block, 20 years+ and counting | 6/17/2010 |
| Q: I'm a mess. I think I've spiraled slowly down into this dark pit of self-loathing and hopelessness ... A: Shea, There’s a lot in this entry. I think the most important thing here is to say; YES you most ... | |
| Rape Punishment | 6/15/2010 |
| Q: My first year in college, I met a guy who asked me out and I refused him. I told him, I only wanted ... A: The painful part of intercourse may be physiological, or in fact, it might mean that you’ve ... | |
| Helping a Rape Victim | 6/1/2010 |
| Q: About two years ago I met this girl while I was working. She was visiting from Florida and we spent ... A: Victor, First, let me say that you have done an amazing job thus far with her. You certainly can ... | |
| My uncle | 5/30/2010 |
| Q: When I was 10 my uncle raped a family friend. My parents didn't tell me. I was with my dad at her ... A: Trust is earned. Trust is not something that we can force, or we can demand. So, I would say this; ... | |
| Was I raped ? | 5/28/2010 |
| Q: When I was 10 years old ; I was hanging out with a friend of mine and her brother and his friend. My ... A: I know you said that you can’t talk with your family, but I cannot stress enough how critical it is ... | |
| Was I raped ? | 5/26/2010 |
| Q: When I was 10 years old ; I was hanging out with a friend of mine and her brother and his friend. My ... A: Mackenzie, You did fight back. You did say no, and you didn’t give up- you chose to survive. You ... | |
| raped | 5/23/2010 |
| Q: I've been raped 12 times in the past 6 years. The first time I was 16 and a virgin. The last time ... A: I am sorry that you haven’t had good luck with RAINN. I guess I would start seeking a counselor on ... | |
| Acqua | 5/21/2010 |
| Q: I have been married for over ten years to a wonderful woman. Last night, she informed me that she ... A: I cannot talk about how she should heal, or “deal” with what happened to her. She has to come to ... | |
| Helping a friend | 5/20/2010 |
| Q: My best friend was raped a year ago and ended up pregnant. She lost the baby about 7 weeks later. My ... A: Kay- I think it’s OK to say, I remember. I think it’s OK to say I care. I think it’s OK to say I’m ... | |
| Ex-Boyfriend. | 5/19/2010 |
| Q: I had been with a boyfriend for a little more than 4 years. He was verbally, emotionally, and ... A: Emre, First and foremost, this wasn’t your fault. And while hearing that your feelings and ... | |
| promiscuity? | 5/18/2010 |
| Q: I have asked you for advice before and you helped me so much. Now I have another question. ... A: I don’t know for sure why you’d want to look at lesbian porn? But my guess is you want to view ... | |
| promiscuity? | 5/17/2010 |
| Q: I have asked you for advice before and you helped me so much. Now I have another question. ... A: I am glad that I helped last time. Allison, let me be very honest with you, I too went through ... | |
| How does a Husband Help? | 5/16/2010 |
| Q: My wife was emotionally and verbally abused as a child by her father. She was also raped by a ... A: Well, first I have to ask is she active in her therapy? If she is active in her therapy there’s a ... | |
| Conflicted | 5/13/2010 |
| Q: I was visiting a friend with whom I had messed around with before (eg making out, petting, oral & ... A: I guess you have to weigh the pros and cons with telling your boyfriend about what happened. I am a ... | |
| Rape | 5/11/2010 |
| Q: In 2001, while attending college, a male acquaintance insisted on getting me a drink at a private ... A: Ann, When they do a rape kit they make a report, and I do believe they keep these records 8 to 10 ... | |
| Questions. | 1/4/2010 |
| Q: About 3 months ago I was rapped by a fraternity brother.Being in a sorority, I see the guy who did ... A: Catherine, I am so sorry that this happened to you. As far as telling your boyfriend that’s ... | |
| My friend | 1/3/2010 |
| Q: My friend was sexually assaulted by her father when she was little (she didnt say the exact age) and ... A: Reid, There’s nothing that says that you have to talk about what happened. There’s nothing that ... | |
| I dont kno what to do! | 1/2/2010 |
| Q: Its a really long and complicated story, but I'll try and keep it to the point- I'm 16, i was raped ... A: Alison, The cutting is a way of coping, and you’re right it’s likely only a matter of time before ... | |
| Is it too late? | 1/1/2010 |
| Q: My ex bf and I broke up when I found out he cheated on me. We didn't talk for a few weeks but then ... A: Charlotte, I would never discourage you reporting and it’s never too late, however, some of the ... | |
| how do i not let it affect my relationships ? | 12/31/2009 |
| Q: I am 20 years old, female, I was raped when i was 10 by my step father. He did it throughout the ... A: I am sorry that this is happening to you. I wish so much for you. You most certainly could be ... | |
| What's going on? | 12/28/2009 |
| Q: My 15 year old granddaughter went to a summer camp as a helper for two weeks this summer. She has ... A: Alie, It wasn’t clear; did your granddaughter experience a trauma at camp? Possibly rape? Or do you ... | |
| what do i do | 12/27/2009 |
| Q: I was raped from the age of 8-15. However just recently at 21 i have started reliving these events ... A: Danielle, It sounds like there are a few things going on (but you’ll need to see a doctor for a ... | |
| Miscarriage after rape | 12/26/2009 |
| Q: Last year I was raped several times by my father. I ended up getting pregnant, which I didn't know. ... A: Kay, Yes, it is very normal to miss a child that is lost in miscarriage. Whether that child was ... | |
| I'm not sure. | 12/25/2009 |
| Q: Well, i was raped when i was thirteen by one of my brother's friends. Afterword he ran out and we ... A: Emilie, First, I want to say that you are not a whore. I want to tell you that this is common with ... | |
| Victim | 12/22/2009 |
| Q: I am currently with a girl whom I have a child with, earlier in our relationship when we first dated ... A: Austin, It’s a very true statement that she could be behaving this way because of her rape. It ... | |
| Tired of dealing with the past | 11/18/2009 |
| Q: "Hello - thank you for taking the time to read my question and to answer. Years ago, I was married ... A: Shannon, The Christian counselor will help you a great deal, I wonder though if you could see a ... | |
| Intimacy, PTSD, losing virginity to rape | 11/11/2009 |
| Q: I am now in my 30s and my 1st boyfriend took my virginity in my teens without my consent. I made the ... A: Your concern and worry are valid and normal after all that you’ve been through, of course. I think ... | |
| Sexual assault in grade school from 3rd-5th | 11/9/2009 |
| Q: Please excuse the long post and the explanation being a bit all over the place... i'm not sure how ... A: You’ve been touched by rape, abuse, neglect, suicide and so so much loss and pain. For you to say ... | |
| should I tell my secret? | 11/6/2009 |
| Q: Five years ago my son's father walked out on us just two months after we had him. Five months after ... A: Jessica, We are certainly not required to share this information. Many of us choose to share after ... | |
| INTERVIEW QUESTIONS | 10/18/2009 |
| Q: I am due to attend an interview as a support worker at the local rape crisis centre, i have a good ... A: Laura, Well, I am guessing you are asking for yourself and not as a student? In the interviewing ... | |
| help | 10/14/2009 |
| Q: ummm. i was raped almost two years ago. i have never spoke of it to any one except one person and ... A: Samantha, It’s Ok to be afraid to start talking about this and it’s Ok to be afraid of the unknown ... | |
| my boyfriend was nearly raped | 10/13/2009 |
| Q: so my boyfriend is straight altho bi-curious at a young age, however when he was 27 he got into a ... A: Chloe, Is your boyfriend having feelings of violence now too? This is a big concern for me. ... | |
| Fiance was sexually abused by step-brother | 10/11/2009 |
| Q: Within the first 8 months of dating, my fiance got drunk and told me while crying hysterically that ... A: Laura, I am curious, does he feel some sort of obligation to his family. Is it really love or fear? ... | |
| 10 YEAR OLD RAPED BY 64 YEAR OLD | 10/10/2009 |
| Q: HOW CAN I GET THIS LITTLE GIRL HELP? IS THERE SOMEWHERE IN SOUTH FLORIDA THAT SHE CAN MEET KIDS THAT ... A: Well I don’t have a zip code, but here is rape and incest orientated help in your area, this is a ... | |
| Where do I go from here?? | 10/8/2009 |
| Q: I don't even know where to begin??...It all started a week ago I went out for some drinks with ... A: Crystal, I am so sorry that this happened to you. Please call the number that your doctor gave ... | |
| incest/rape | 10/7/2009 |
| Q: I am a woman in my 5O'S and am a survivor of incest and rape more than once. I tried therapy yrs. ... A: Deborah, It’s not uncommon for people to not get much from therapy at first, but, please consider ... | |
| how do i get this pattern to stop | 10/5/2009 |
| Q: Ok, first off, i startd my sexual life when i wa 14 by a 18 yr old that has done time for ... A: Betty, First let me say that, it doesn’t have to be rape for it to paralyze you with fear and pain. ... | |
| Just now remembering sexual abuse. | 10/4/2009 |
| Q: I am a 19 year old female and I believe that I was sexually abused when I was younger. I have ... A: Lauren, The mind is extremely powerful and protective when it needs to be. As a child you may or ... | |
| Im not at peace with my self | 9/23/2009 |
| Q: My name is Danielle Bell and I just turned 18 and my past has finally caught up with me. For the ... A: Danielle, I understand what you are saying, completely, and it’s so frustrating. You say that it ... | |
| girlfriend raped by her father | 9/21/2009 |
| Q: my girlfriend has the worse father in the world. He used to abuse her when she was little to the ... A: Nick, I am not going to tell you how to control your emotions, because it’s important that you deal ... | |
| what do i do next | 9/2/2009 |
| Q: i was comletely shocked when she told me and wanted to help her straight away.she recently told me ... A: Louise, Would she consider getting help if you went with her? Ask her what about getting help ... | |
| im married to a rape victim | 8/30/2009 |
| Q: I have been married to my wife for four wonderful years and sex has been good up until this past ... A: Matt, I think marriage counseling is an excellent option. Also, you stated that she’s on ... | |
| Is this Rape? | 8/29/2009 |
| Q: When I was away to visit family, my girlfriend had a poker party at her place. A guy that she has ... A: Mike, Your girlfriend was not able to consent. She thought it was you, and this man took advantage ... | |
| rape | 8/28/2009 |
| Q: when i was 12 i didn't look like the ordinary 12 yr old i had the body of a 17 yr old, and my ... A: Kerrie, I must first ask that you see even just your family doctor to get some medication that can ... | |
| Boyfriend wants to hire PI | 8/26/2009 |
| Q: I was just attacked and raped a few days ago. My fiance lives in a different state than me right ... A: Melissa, First let me apologize for my delay in writing. I was in the hospital. I guess for me ... | |
| Rape,Anger, forgivness | 8/24/2009 |
| Q: I was raped multiple times by ex husband. He would also bring 3 of his friends in to for money to ... A: Angela, This is a lot for you to process, so naturally it is a lot for your husband to process. ... | |
| Wife Raped & Abused | 8/21/2009 |
| Q: My new wife was sexually abused orally at 11 years old and never told anyone. At 23 she was raped ... A: Rick, It seems now that she is in a safe, secure, nurturing relationship; her mind is reminding her ... | |
| Rape,Anger, forgivness | 8/16/2009 |
| Q: I was raped multiple times by ex husband. He would also bring 3 of his friends in to for money to ... A: Angela, Anger is a normal response to what you’ve been through. Also, the sort of nightmares that ... | |
| girlfriend got raped | 8/15/2009 |
| Q: here's what's troubling me, my girlfriend, who lives in Japan, andi live in Hong Kong, was raped ... A: M, Her very best bet is to contact an agency or clinic locally or even go to the hospital and have ... | |
| Best friend raped. | 8/8/2009 |
| Q: I've recently learned that my best friend was raped by his father in his early teens, he is now a ... A: Jonathon- First of all it’s quite a lot of pressure for you to hold this secret and also support ... | |
| disconnected from sexual experiences | 8/6/2009 |
| Q: I'm back again. I met this guy while volunteering, he has a girlfriend but I am 95% sure he has a ... A: What do you mean that the fear of sex sounds weird? Weird how? I also think it’s interesting that ... | |
| disconnected from sexual experiences | 8/4/2009 |
| Q: I'm back again. I met this guy while volunteering, he has a girlfriend but I am 95% sure he has a ... A: During your rape you didn’t have to do oral but that meant that he did more things to you. Have you ... | |
| disconnected from sexual experiences | 8/2/2009 |
| Q: I'm back again. I met this guy while volunteering, he has a girlfriend but I am 95% sure he has a ... A: Alison, It is not abnormal for a survivor to feel emotionally disconnected. I will admit that I ... | |
| a year and a half later | 8/1/2009 |
| Q: About year and a half ago I was raped by my ex and four of his friends at the same time.. To this ... A: Clara, First of all, I am so sorry that this happened to you, and like you I have no idea where I ... | |
| How to Cope | 7/29/2009 |
| Q: I was raped when I was 14 by a family friend. I am now almost 17, and since that day there hasn't ... A: I would not wait till you're 18. That is over a year from now and so much can happen in a year and ... | |
| How to Cope | 7/25/2009 |
| Q: I was raped when I was 14 by a family friend. I am now almost 17, and since that day there hasn't ... A: Celia, I agree with your cousin absolutely. Although, you’ll need to tell your parents because ... | |
| I can not get close to a man | 7/18/2009 |
| Q: My husband told me that I should not of put my self in that position . I filled for divorce the next ... A: Ronny, First, I am so sorry for all that you’ve had to endure in your life and that now you are ... | |
| girlfriend was assaulted | 7/15/2009 |
| Q: Last night a man followed my girlfriend home and forced his way in to her apartment with her. He ... A: Alex, Your girlfriend was assaulted and that’s for certain. If you want to go by definition, ... | |
| my wife was raped | 7/13/2009 |
| Q: it was 2 summers ago, in 2007. It's not going to get better, we seem to be stuck in the past. We ... A: First, I am a little confused so let me try to clear up a few questions. Your wife was raped, and ... | |
| Rape | 7/8/2009 |
| Q: I was recently raped, I did not tell anyone for weeks after..I have now told my husband and one good ... A: I can completely understand not wanting to relive it again. That's why I recommend talking with a ... | |
| Rape | 7/8/2009 |
| Q: I was recently raped, I did not tell anyone for weeks after..I have now told my husband and one good ... A: Laurie, It often takes a lot of strength and courage to take the first step to reach out, it’s ... | |
| Sex after Rape... | 7/6/2009 |
| Q: When I was 17 , I was hanging out with a guy that I was good friends with. We drove around together ... A: Sara, First, let me say this, I think a conversation needs to take place with you and your husband. ... | |
| abuse help? | 7/3/2009 |
| Q: i am now a 15 year old girl, and some things happened when i was younger and i am unsure what to ... A: Steph, It’s natural to be curious. It is also natural to explore. Do you recall doing anything with ... | |
| A year on | 7/1/2009 |
| Q: A year ago, this month, i was raped. My drink was spiked and a friend of my boyfriend (now ex)raped ... A: Unknown Silence, The name you’ve given yourself here says so much. First of all, I am happy to ... | |
| Please help | 6/29/2009 |
| Q: and 2 moths ago I was raped again by my friend. After it happen when I was 12 I started taking ... A: Alex, It sounds like you are using many different coping strategies to help you get through, even ... | |
| your help please | 6/24/2009 |
| Q: about a year ago one of my best friends got me drunk and had sex with me. my question is "if he knew ... A: Yes, that is date rape. You said that you didn’t say no, how did you feel about having sex with him? ... | |
| please help | 6/23/2009 |
| Q: "Hi there, i have a current problem that i hope you can help me with. When i lost my virginity i was ... A: Kelly, I am sorry that your new boyfriend is fearful. I think that you need to stay active with ... | |
| Partner of rape victim | 6/22/2009 |
| Q: im am a partner of a rape victim. i have known about it for a few months now n we have been dating ... A: A, Yes, you’re right, her promiscuity and poor choices and behaviors following her abuse are very ... | |
| My friend might hae been raped | 6/18/2009 |
| Q: Recently one of my best friends disappeared just from everywhere. She wouldn't answer her phone, ... A: Katie, She COULD have been raped and or abused. It's really hard to say, but either way, something ... | |
| sex? | 6/16/2009 |
| Q: First off, I have asked this question to 2 other experts and none of them have gotten back to me in ... A: Your therapist is right. It is better to talk through your pain than it is to drink them away. It’s ... | |
| MY GIRL WAS RAPED | 6/15/2009 |
| Q: I am dating a girl I love soo much. But the problem is tha she was RAPED WHILST VIRGIN by her ... A: It’s normal to go through a feeling of un-feeling after rape. However, it could develop into a ... | |
| was i raped? | 6/14/2009 |
| Q: Me and my friend met up with two guys one night. We were all expecting to have sex, i was a little ... A: Erica, Anytime you are not consenting to sex and your partner doesn’t listen when you say no, it is ... | |
| sex? | 6/13/2009 |
| Q: First off, I have asked this question to 2 other experts and none of them have gotten back to me in ... A: Alison, Yes, it is normal to have these sorts of symptoms and responses. The drinking, the easily ... | |
| i was raped recently, and I don't know how to tell my husband | 6/1/2009 |
| Q: Last weekend I went to a martini bar with some friends about an hour and a half from my house. We ... A: If you are not ready to tell your husband that’s OK, but I strongly encourage you to set up an ... | |
| associated disorders | 5/28/2009 |
| Q: How can rape lead to anxiety, panic. Now, when I answer the phone the words don't come out and its ... A: I think that rape leads to anxiety and panic because of loss of control, because of the fear that ... | |
| reactions to rape? | 5/27/2009 |
| Q: Kim, I was raped over a year ago and I feel like I just can't make friends, like go up to people ... A: What that means is YOU not me may be so afraid of people letting you down, hurting you, that you ... | |
| boyfriend of rape victim | 5/27/2009 |
| Q: I am the boyfriend of a girl who was raped approx. 5 years ago. Those memories are haunting her ... A: Ron, The best way to support her is support her efforts in therapy. Talk with her about what she ... | |
| Was it consensual? | 5/26/2009 |
| Q: About a year ago, I was at a party. I had considerably too much to drink. My friend left with a guy, ... A: Lora, No it was not consensual. You said no, you said you didn’t want to, and you even said you ... | |
| reactions to rape? | 5/24/2009 |
| Q: Kim, I was raped over a year ago and I feel like I just can't make friends, like go up to people ... A: Alison, It sounds like with your disability you may worry about losing people and so you protect ... | |
| My Boyfriend was molested by his mother | 5/22/2009 |
| Q: When my boyfriend was younger he was molested by his mother. I don't know how long this went on, and ... A: Susan, With such feelings, you MUST get him help ASAP. So many things can go wrong with such ... | |
| reactions to rape? | 5/21/2009 |
| Q: Kim, I was raped over a year ago and I feel like I just can't make friends, like go up to people ... A: Alison, First, relationships are affected after rape, usually the worst affect goes to sexual ... | |
| Girlfreind was date raped and feel its taken out on me | 5/20/2009 |
| Q: I was the boyfreind of someone who was date raped about a month before she met me. I was very ... A: Ron, It sounds like she’s translating your comment in a completely different meaning and this is ... | |
| How do I move on? | 5/17/2009 |
| Q: When I was 17, I was raped by two men (I don't know who they were) on my way home from a club. I ... A: Nina, Check your laws there in Norway. Unfortunately I was not successful in locating a number or ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped and i'm confused | 5/14/2009 |
| Q: The girl I'm in love with was raped about a month before we started dating which i think was about ... A: Brian, It sounds like she’s not ready. It sounds like she might be in denial. She also may be ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped and i'm confused | 5/13/2009 |
| Q: The girl I'm in love with was raped about a month before we started dating which i think was about ... A: Brian, I can understand your upset her. I would be too, and it is hard to understand her emotions, ... | |
| signs of being raped | 4/22/2009 |
| Q: My question being, which puzzles me a lot..well let me tell the story, I came back from work ... A: Rachelle, Well, first of all, it sounds like he is possibly dealing with what we call Rape Trauma ... | |
| My Girlfriend Got Raped By Her Brother..... | 4/20/2009 |
| Q: Ok I'm going out with this girl,, her name too is Kim. ((Lesbian Relationship))She has felt that she ... A: Ok, so it sounds like her attacker is in jail. She can always get an Order of Protection. You said ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped by her father | 4/14/2009 |
| Q: Her father raped her when she was 7, between the ages of 7 and 12 it totaled up to about 12 times. ... A: Justin, I would be worried too. Does she live alone now? How old is she? Can she get an order of ... | |
| Questions about dealing with a rape survivor | 4/13/2009 |
| Q: A woman I am dating recently disclosed she is a rape survivor and could use some advice on what I ... A: Well, let’s start with what are your questions? You certainly can ask her and be prepared and ... | |
| Rape?? | 4/12/2009 |
| Q: In the situation I told the guy no and that I didn't want to do anything, but I had been drinking ... A: Laura, I can understand being/feeling numb; BUT that can be a very dangerous way to cope. Please be ... | |
| Rape?? | 4/9/2009 |
| Q: In the situation I told the guy no and that I didn't want to do anything, but I had been drinking ... A: I can understand being scared. Do you have a friend that you'd feel safe and comfortable talking to ... | |
| moving past the abuse | 4/9/2009 |
| Q: Kim, I am hoping you can give me some advise as it sounds like you may know what I am going ... A: Heidi, I am happy that you have an appointment. I can understand all of those feelings. It is hard. ... | |
| Rape?? | 4/8/2009 |
| Q: In the situation I told the guy no and that I didn't want to do anything, but I had been drinking ... A: Laura, Yes, you were raped. This was not your fault. You said no, and even if you didn't say the ... | |
| moving past the abuse | 4/6/2009 |
| Q: Kim, I am hoping you can give me some advise as it sounds like you may know what I am going ... A: Heidi, Well, I can understand where you are coming from. I have a good relationship with one of my ... | |
| Girlfriend with trust issues | 4/5/2009 |
| Q: My girlfriend of two months, Taylor, was sexually assaulted by her cousin when she was 5. The only ... A: Well, Nick, first you need to gain Taylor's trust. Talk with her about this. See what she needs and ... | |
| how do i get past this | 4/4/2009 |
| Q: nightmares every night now and i cant consetrat in school i will be doing my work and just start ... A: Ashley, I am very concerned about you. You're very young. How are you getting all this alcohol and ... | |
| New boyfriend opened up about childhood rape | 4/3/2009 |
| Q: I started dating a 22 year old about a month ago. We are having a lot of fun starting this ... A: Jean, He will need to go slow. He will need to develop trust with you. Also you may want to ... | |
| A victims significant other (More Info) | 3/31/2009 |
| Q: Is it possible for a rape victims significant other such as a boyfriend or girlfriend that is really ... A: Aubrey, Love is incredible. When you love someone we tend to feel their pain just as much as their ... | |
| A lot of questions.... | 3/30/2009 |
| Q: This happened about a month ago. My friend brought me to a small party. There were about 8 people, ... A: Murasaki, Wow. In the condition that you were in I don’t know that you would have felt being ... | |
| A victims significant other | 3/29/2009 |
| Q: Is it possible for a rape victims significant other such as a boyfriend or girlfriend that is really ... A: Well of course. The significant other can feel some of the symptoms with their loved one. What ... | |
| Was I raped?... | 3/26/2009 |
| Q: I am now 18 years old, but when I was around the age of 11 years old. Me and my family were really ... A: Julie, Yes, if there was penetration it is rape. This sounds like incest or molestation but maybe ... | |
| I don't know if it was rape, but I'm having trouble sleeping. | 3/24/2009 |
| Q: I'm really confused. My boyfriend and I of 3 and a half years had been partying one night. We were ... A: Alexandria, I would encourage you to speak to each other, possibly even consider counseling. ... | |
| How? | 3/21/2009 |
| Q: I am living with people i hardly even know well iam getting use to them now.I know u may say it was ... A: Are you safe there? How dis you find the people you're living with? Are you having a hard time ... | |
| HELP! | 3/20/2009 |
| Q: Hey my name is Geneva ,but people call me Neva. I was raped last summer,When i was 16. It hurted bad ... A: Neva, Who is taking care of you if both parents are gone? Who have you told and you’re not getting ... | |
| My Girlfriend was raped in the past... | 3/19/2009 |
| Q: I have been seeing this wonderful girl named Stephanie for about 2 months now. I love her for all ... A: Garrett, Thank you for the picture. You appear to be a lovely couple. What you doing is ... | |
| Is this considered rape? | 3/16/2009 |
| Q: Nine years ago when I was 17 I had been seeing a 19 year old guy, for about two weeks. One night we ... A: Katie, I am so sorry that this happened and I can understand all your emotions. This was rape. I ... | |
| Remembering rape | 3/12/2009 |
| Q: I was 12 at the time of incident he was 18 one of my mum's friends why did I think it was alright? I ... A: Coralie, It is not unusual for rape victims to become promiscuous especially if they were virgins ... | |
| my girlfriend | 3/11/2009 |
| Q: To whom this may concern, I fear that my girlfriend may have been raped ... A: Jack, I would have to agree with you, this is not “normal” behavior and her reactions do seem ... | |
| I need to feel better | 3/10/2009 |
| Q: My brother molested me for years when i was a child. i remember watching my first pornographic movie ... A: Elizabeth, I think in order to heal from all this abuse you need to get into counseling. I think ... | |
| my gf....... | 3/9/2009 |
| Q: today my gf told me in tears that her step dad has been raping her. and she does not want to tell ... A: Brian, A few things, is your girlfriend a minor? Unfortunately if she is refusing to tell you can ... | |
| Kidnapping/rape | 3/9/2009 |
| Q: I was recently kidnapped, raped and assaulted by a supposed "friend of the family" and am having ... A: Sarah, Well, the good news is that RAINN (Rape Abuse and Incest National Network) organizations are ... | |
| Molestation. | 3/4/2009 |
| Q: Well if I was really molested,then wouldn't my grades be bad? ANSWER: No, not at all. Many people ... A: * Fear or dislike of certain people or places * Seductive or "sexy" behavior towards adults ... | |
| Telling people about a rape | 2/27/2009 |
| Q: I guess my story is, sadly, like many others. I'm a female science student at a state school, I'm a ... A: Marie, First of all, I do not think that it is unprofessional that you shared with your mentor that ... | |
| Legal ? | 2/26/2009 |
| Q: Though many years have passed, I still think about the one who attacked me (and I learned, other ... A: Anna, I am not sure what you mean by your institution? You can always press charges, and I would ... | |
| 15 years ago I was raped | 2/26/2009 |
| Q: I am now 29 but when I was fourteen I was raped. I conceived a child from this trajedy. My son is ... A: I can understand why you'd want to know, and why your son would want to know. Did you have a rape ... | |
| kidnapping/rapes | 2/24/2009 |
| Q: I don't know who else to turn to for help and understanding. I was abducted from inside my home two ... A: Debbie, I am so sorry that this happened to you. A few things, please consider marriage ... | |
| help | 2/23/2009 |
| Q: my name is Jessica, i'm 17 years old i have a boyfriend hes 21 we have been together a little over a ... A: Jess, I understand that you love him, but at the same time, I have to ask you, why someone that ... | |
| Molestation. | 2/23/2009 |
| Q: I learned about sex at a very eary age.When I was six,I had a crush on my gym teacher and I thought ... A: CGLLR, I can’t say for sure if you were molested or not, but clearly something is wrong. To be so ... | |
| helping someone whos been raped multi times | 2/22/2009 |
| Q: my wife told me shes been raped 4 times the first time was when she 14 and was a virgin she was ... A: Shaun, It sounds like she needs to continue on with therapy. Like she hasn’t finished with therapy ... | |
| Was I raped? | 2/22/2009 |
| Q: i'm 18 and about a year ago I had sex with a friend of mine. We were at a party and we were both ... A: Alyssa, OK, let’s start here. At first you were ok, but your body is your body and at ANY point ... | |
| Disociation | 2/16/2009 |
| Q: My girlfriend was a 20 year old virgin when she was raped two years ago. I am the first person to ... A: I would recommend seeing a sex therapist. What is likely happening here along with her dissociation ... | |
| My family was recently violated and I dont know how to help her. | 2/14/2009 |
| Q: We are new in our relationship but I am very much in love with her. This tragedy has severly ... A: Bill, Continue to love and support her, and try not to push her, believe it or not sometimes that ... | |
| i want help | 2/12/2009 |
| Q: I lived with my mom my whole life in California and for the last couple of years out there (between ... A: Alex, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. I know how hard it is to talk about this. I know ... | |
| my daughter | 2/8/2009 |
| Q: how can i help her though this time as i have just found out about the rape ANSWER: Wendy, I would ... A: You have to respect her wishes. It sounds like she may be dealing with RTS (Rape Trauma Syndrome) ... | |
| my daughter | 2/6/2009 |
| Q: how can i help her though this time as i have just found out about the rape A: Wendy, I would get her help in your area as soon as possible. www.rainn.org go to “Get Help” and ... | |
| rape and your life | 2/5/2009 |
| Q: I am with an amazing woman. I am 18 and she is 17. I love her and she loves me and everything is ... A: Patrick, It sounds like she just needed to meet the right person, a person who would be committed ... | |
| my sister was raped | 2/4/2009 |
| Q: i recently found out that my sister was just raped not too long ago and i don't know what to do or ... A: Sarah, Did your sister go to the hospital after the rape? I would recommend getting in contact with ... | |
| Very confused. | 2/1/2009 |
| Q: A year ago today I think I was raped. I say "I think" because I'm not sure. He was my roommates ... A: Natalie, I agree with your doctor and friends here. I think what happened was date rape. Also, I ... | |
| help for a 14 year old | 2/1/2009 |
| Q: When I was younger, I was raped by a man I didn't know. I was a violent child, drawing about suicide ... A: Elizabeth, There’s so much going on here. The cutting even the thoughts and drawing of suicide and ... | |
| I was raped 8 years ago | 1/25/2009 |
| Q: I was raped 8 years ago when I was 15 years old by an older male probably in his 40's or so but im ... A: Jessica, First of all, I have no idea why they didn’t still do a rape kit. Yes, by showering you ... | |
| My daughter | 1/24/2009 |
| Q: I don't know how to help my daughter. she was attacked and held at gun point recently. I have ... A: Toni, I understand your upset and your pain. I really do. Try to remember though placing blame ... | |
| can you help me | 1/20/2009 |
| Q: i am away from him now, but i been blocking the rape out. and it is now hittin me hard i have never ... A: Ashley, I really have to advise counseling first and foremost. Anything you do can help short ... | |
| old wounds | 1/13/2009 |
| Q: I am not a rape survivor, but the sister of one. My sister was visiting me in college and a man ... A: Michelle, It must be horribly hard to have lived all these years in such guilt. Michelle you’ve ... | |
| Advice | 1/7/2009 |
| Q: I need help. My wife was raped some 17 years ago. Since that time she has pretended to enjoy sex and ... A: Mark, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. I am concerned and a little confused. Does she ... | |
| Girlfriends past rape's tendrils possibly touching our relationship | 1/5/2009 |
| Q: I just want to state I have also copy pasted this question to Lucille Zimmerman because I would ... A: Jesse, You certainly can get as many views and help as you need, therefore I have no problem with ... | |
| Rape | 1/2/2009 |
| Q: I can't believe im doing this right now. But this is way too emotionally overwhelming and I need to ... A: Victor, Vanessa is coping with her abuse and not just this rape or the prior rape but her father’s ... | |
| please help | 12/29/2008 |
| Q: mother won't believe me and my father walked out on us when my sister and i were 2,i'm really ... A: Amelia, I am happy that you have the nurse that you can talk to and that she is making you feel ... | |
| please help | 12/28/2008 |
| Q: mother won't believe me and my father walked out on us when my sister and i were 2,i'm really ... A: Yes I think that you should make a report. You do not have to take that. I am sorry that your ... | |
| Lost and I feel ALONE | 12/27/2008 |
| Q: I don't know where to start, so I guess I will start here...July of 2006, it was suppose to be an ... A: Pamela, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. First, when you went to the police and or ... | |
| rape | 12/26/2008 |
| Q: i was raped 7 years ago when i was 15, i was out with my friend and we met up with some guys that ... A: Hayley, Why would you feel “stupid” telling your partner what happened to you that night? How is ... | |
| please help | 12/25/2008 |
| Q: mother won't believe me and my father walked out on us when my sister and i were 2,i'm really ... A: Are you able to get any counseling? Counseling would help with the nightmares and would help you ... | |
| dating again? | 12/11/2008 |
| Q: On the friday after thanksgiving, I went to a bar with a friend. When I go to bars, I get very ... A: Alison, I can understand that you can’t tell your parents, but you need therapy to help you with the ... | |
| Was it my fault? Or was it even rape? | 12/9/2008 |
| Q: I met a guy through some very close to me, this guy is a friend of the person that is very close to ... A: T, Yes this is rape. At any point you can say no and if they don’t listen it is rape. I am so sorry ... | |
| Is it just me? | 12/9/2008 |
| Q: I'm 20 years old and I've been pretty promiscuous since I was about 14. When I was 13 I remember ... A: Katelyn, I am sorry that I haven’t written sooner. I haven’t been feeling well. Promiscuity is ... | |
| My Girlfriend | 12/6/2008 |
| Q: I have been in an off and on relationship with my girlfriend for about 4 years now. We dated in high ... A: Dan, You are entitled to your emotions and it’s ok that you are feeling them so long as you don’t ... | |
| dating again? | 12/6/2008 |
| Q: On the friday after thanksgiving, I went to a bar with a friend. When I go to bars, I get very ... A: Alison, I am a little confused. Were you raped prior? Is this why you feel you have an inability to ... | |
| Resurfacing Anger Related to Mom's Reaction to Rape | 12/2/2008 |
| Q: I am a 35 year old who was raped at 17 years of age by my ex-boyfriend. We had broken up and he ... A: Tamara, My heart broke as I read this. I am so sorry. I am not sure that I want to write what ... | |
| Inability to be affectionate. | 12/1/2008 |
| Q: I was raped when I was 13 years old. I am now 21 and it seems that every relationship I've had has ... A: Julia, I am sorry that you are struggling. Please don’t think you are alone. Why do you feel you ... | |
| Confused | 11/23/2008 |
| Q: After my parents found out about what happened to me, things just kind of went on like nothing ever ... A: Well that depends. If you are a minor by law there are parts of what you tell professionals and ... | |
| Fears and Flashbacks | 11/20/2008 |
| Q: This is going to be long, sorry. I just dont want to miss anything that may be important... I am 20 ... A: Marie, What if you could get therapy or help on a sliding scale (meaning they worked with your ... | |
| My gilfriend was raped | 11/20/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 1/2 years now, and only about 8 months ago did she ... A: Several things are happening here. Has she been tested for these seizures? They may be what is ... | |
| drug/hypnosis rape | 11/19/2008 |
| Q: My husband and I discovered our neighbors, for the past 4 years, have slipped us date rape drugs and ... A: As far as the date rape drug, Long term affects are not known, but here is a link that you may find ... | |
| rape | 11/18/2008 |
| Q: I was gang raped 30 years ago. I never talked about it, just sort of put it in a "drawer" and tried ... A: I apologize; I thought I had answered this. So I am sorry for the late reply. Yes, this can and ... | |
| one year | 11/17/2008 |
| Q: About 2 weeks ago was the one year anniversary of my rape. I had gone out with friends for a fun ... A: I don’t know all of the effects that you may be suffering from in regard to RTS (Rape Trauma ... | |
| nightmares | 11/16/2008 |
| Q: I'm 18 years old and I was raped 3 years ago. I was at a party waiting to use the bathroom and ... A: Nicole, Yes, it’s common to experience these feelings and symptoms 3 years from when they happened. ... | |
| one year | 11/16/2008 |
| Q: About 2 weeks ago was the one year anniversary of my rape. I had gone out with friends for a fun ... A: Alison, I am concerned for you. Yes it’s common to be emotional around an anniversary date. A lot ... | |
| becoming a rape counselor | 11/14/2008 |
| Q: I too am a survior. I was raped just this past year in March and also molested in 2005 my sophomore ... A: Arianna, First, I am sorry to hear that you were a victim, but so proud that you are working ... | |
| Girlfriend raped and molested by stepfather. | 11/12/2008 |
| Q: Kim, I have never come to the internet to ask for help but it seems to be the only place with ... A: Corbin, I understand your feelings about your girlfriend. But the good news is that she is getting ... | |
| how do i tell my boyfriend? | 11/12/2008 |
| Q: .. I am 21 years old am I was raped about two months ago and again this past weekend by the same ... A: Kelly, I wish there was an easy way to do this, but I fear there isn’t. When you went to the ER ... | |
| Helping my 15 year old daughter after being attacked a week ago | 11/11/2008 |
| Q: I'm lost as to what to do to help my daughter deal with the attack. I would also like someone to ... A: Mary, Right now, it’s ok that your daughter isn’t ready. We certainly can not force therapy and ... | |
| is this rape? | 11/6/2008 |
| Q: I know there are many questions like this and you have the definition of rape many times but I still ... A: Kayla, First of all I am sorry that I didn’t answer this sooner. As I read this I see a few ... | |
| Gang Rape | 11/4/2008 |
| Q: I was gang raped in December 2002, unfortunately I shutdown due to the trauma even though I had very ... A: Oh Erika, My heart broke for you as I read this. I am so sorry. When this happened in 2002 did you ... | |
| No memory and confused | 11/2/2008 |
| Q: I was at a club and was drinking with a friend. The last thing I remember was going up to the bar ... A: I can’t say for sure that you were drugged but what I am reading here seems as if you were. I think ... | |
| Was it rape? I'm confused and just need to talk. | 10/29/2008 |
| Q: Over the summer my family and I vacationed in Florida. On our last day there I was sitting by the ... A: I consider this rape yes and here’s why. When you are that intoxicated you can’t consent and it’s ... | |
| Im 12 yrs old I was raped two days ago | 10/29/2008 |
| Q: I'm ashlyn. A few days ago I was on my way to a sleepover party. I always cut through the woods to ... A: Ashlyn, First, you and or with the help of a friend you need to go to your mom or dad and tell them ... | |
| will i ever be able to have a boyfriend | 10/26/2008 |
| Q: when i was a kid mi uncle touch me i live with that for 3 yaer i did tell anyone and i was so hurt. ... A: Alex, It concerns me that you’re saying that you’ll kill him. I can understand your anger and you ... | |
| Rape, or not? | 10/23/2008 |
| Q: I'm writing because I'm a bit confused as to something that happened to me a few weeks ago. It was a ... A: Katie, I don’t think that I would ever call it “drunk sex” what does that mean? Granted when ... | |
| Helping my wife | 10/22/2008 |
| Q: Recently, my wife and I got into an argument about cheating. I had flirted with a girl and she ... A: Bill, Yikes that’s really a tough one. You certainly can not force her to get help, but help is ... | |
| Story of Kate (and Kelsey). | 10/20/2008 |
| Q: I'm an Italian guy and I live in Rome. I'm dating an American girl, Kate, 28 years old, who's ... A: Stefano, Let me please thank you and Kate. I too have so much anger for the people like Kelsey. I ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped | 10/20/2008 |
| Q: I have been in a new relationship for four weeks now. When we got together she told me she was raped ... A: David, If you are just starting out, consider backing off the sexual side of things and talk ... | |
| 15 yrs | 10/19/2008 |
| Q: I was assaulted over 15 years ago onmy 18 birthday actually three days before and am haunted by ... A: What you experience every year is referred to as an anniversary, and yes, it is common to react and ... | |
| lost my girlfriend to rape | 10/14/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend of 4 years, too many of them long distance, we were amazingly in love and devoted, ... A: Marcus, I am so sorry that you lost your girlfriend. You’re right she does need a lot of love. ... | |
| Childhood Sexual Abuse | 9/25/2008 |
| Q: I am 37 years old, the abuse started when I was 5 years old and continued until I was about 17. Two ... A: I would call someone at RAINN and see if they have a list or alternative options. If they can't ... | |
| Don't know where to go from here | 9/22/2008 |
| Q: I feel like I'm stuck in the mud. Like there's no place to go from where I'm at. About 2 years ago I ... A: Brittany, Are you ready for counseling? The memories, nightmares, and body memories (feeling like ... | |
| Childhood Sexual Abuse | 9/21/2008 |
| Q: I am 37 years old, the abuse started when I was 5 years old and continued until I was about 17. Two ... A: Yes this is normal. This is normal because the drugs were your coping mechanism. It was your method ... | |
| i was raped | 9/18/2008 |
| Q: When i was in 2nd grade 8 years old i was raped on the school bus and that was 15 years ago and I'm ... A: Denise, The process is hard. It’s hard to open up and talk about what happened to you. Maybe ... | |
| When can you let go | 9/18/2008 |
| Q: How do you get to the point where you go into details with your Psyh. After 23 years I still can't ... A: Well, if you are still unable to talk to him about your rape that tells me that you’ve not ... | |
| Long story, I need help! | 9/10/2008 |
| Q: Okay, this is unfortunately going to be a really long story, and I'm not sure if this is okay or ... A: Samantha, Wow! Where’s the justice! I don’t know your area, but I would advise getting in touch ... | |
| Rape | 9/10/2008 |
| Q: I was raped out at a bar that i used to frequent. I am currently going through the steps in the ... A: Jackie, I think that the biggest thing is getting specialized help after sexual assault and ... | |
| I was just wondering... | 8/20/2008 |
| Q: I am about to turn 18 in a few days, and a little over a year ago I was raped, but I can't report it ... A: Rachel, Rape is never your fault. It doesn’t matter if you had sex with the person multiple times ... | |
| Urgent - please see http://en.allexperts.com/q/Rape-Counseling-1570/2008/8/feel-deserve-fault.htm | 8/18/2008 |
| Q: Kim I was browsing pages and came across the above page. I emailed tech support. Is there ... A: You said that you emailed tech support, did you get a reply? I think that this should be addressed ... | |
| Other Nightmares | 8/14/2008 |
| Q: I will state first- *I* have not been raped. This isnt about me. A close friend of mine (female) was ... A: Ben, Excellent idea about the dreams! Is she in therapy? If not I strongly encourage her to see a ... | |
| Getting Married | 7/29/2008 |
| Q: I was raped almost 2 years ago. He took my virginity. I kept it to myself for a long time. I went ... A: I would advise counseling. Preferably with someone that specialized in sexual assault and sexual ... | |
| Getting Married | 7/28/2008 |
| Q: I was raped almost 2 years ago. He took my virginity. I kept it to myself for a long time. I went ... A: Andrea, It sounds like what’s happening is you’re depersonalizing and or dissociating and that’s ... | |
| i need some guidence | 7/24/2008 |
| Q: My name is mari. When I was 14, I was raped by an 18 year old friend that I knew and trusted. I ... A: Mari, Well, unfortunately if you are a minor most agencies and organization by law are required to ... | |
| My girlfriend was raped and I have trouble handling it all | 7/20/2008 |
| Q: I need all the help that I can get. This may be quite long, so I hope you could bear with me. My ... A: Sebastian, Wow, there’s a lot going on here. She is in great denial and it sounds like he’s a ... | |
| help needed | 7/18/2008 |
| Q: I am confused lost, and do not know where to turn. I was r**** last year on a date, he laughed, and ... A: Shay, Because of your past, I strongly encourage you to get counseling so that you and your ... | |
| i need some guidence | 7/17/2008 |
| Q: My name is mari. When I was 14, I was raped by an 18 year old friend that I knew and trusted. I ... A: Mari, I am sorry I wasn’t able to write sooner. I will do my best to help you, but I fear that ... | |
| is this rape | 7/16/2008 |
| Q: last night i went out to have a drink with my ex boyfriend and one of his friends everything was ... A: Laquita, No, this is not your fault. A few things may have happened. 1. You may have been given ... | |
| Past haunting | 7/14/2008 |
| Q: Since the discussion of my past I've noticed my emotions are flooding in hard and fast, I feel like ... A: Louise, It takes such great courage to be a mom aside from your pain. I am sure that you do love ... | |
| My gf's fantasies | 7/13/2008 |
| Q: Hey, my girlfriend was raped and beaten a month ago by a guy she really trusted. We were only ... A: Shane, The fantasies are common. Some victims do want to roll play their attacks and this again ... | |
| Broken Trust... | 7/12/2008 |
| Q: Here's my story. This might be kinda long, but I remember everything vividly...and I haven't told ... A: Oh Kelsey, Oh wow. I am so sorry. My heart just broke for you reading that. If you don’t want to ... | |
| Heal others? | 7/11/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend was raped by an acquaintance at the age of 13. She is now 20. -She did not tell her ... A: Well it sounds like she followed in a pretty “common” time line and or time frame with rape victims. ... | |
| please help with my bf!! | 7/11/2008 |
| Q: well let me tell you the story. it is about me and how my bf is handling it. one night me and my bf ... A: Lindsay, I am sorry that your boyfriend isn’t handling what happened to you. This sounds like ... | |
| lost. | 7/10/2008 |
| Q: I never told anyone and really forgot about it. This past year i started passing out everyday and it ... A: Megan, It sounds like what you are experiencing are Body Memories, and or there’s actually a term ... | |
| I don't know what to do. | 7/7/2008 |
| Q: Last week my girlfriend and I went out of the state to see my "best friend" and his wife and child. ... A: Eric, Your girlfriend may be going through Rape Trauma Syndrome, the trauma may have been enough ... | |
| My niece was raped | 7/6/2008 |
| Q: My 14yrs old niece who had developed a sleep walk disorder was raped about 4 times,and the man ran ... A: Ruddie, Were you ever a victim? Your response really alarmed me into thinking that maybe you were a ... | |
| I dont know if it was rape, but I am having a hard time dealing with it.... | 7/6/2008 |
| Q: I don't think what happened to me can really be considered rape because it started out consensual. ... A: Carrie, You can stop giving consent at any point and they must listen and stop or it is rape. The ... | |
| Dating/marraige to a rape victim | 7/4/2008 |
| Q: I have been dating a victim of rape for a year and am completely in love and living together. The ... A: Josh, I suggest go to a local center or counseling center, and they can help you individually. To ... | |
| was this rape? | 7/1/2008 |
| Q: Ok I’m not even sure if this counts as rape and was hoping you could give me a clear answer as to ... A: Hannah, You were sexually assaulted, there’s no doubt. It’s not uncommon to forget parts of or ... | |
| i told him "no. i have a boyfriend." | 6/30/2008 |
| Q: over the weekend, i went to a friend's bachelorette party. we had been drinking a lot. we met some ... A: Amour, Yes, this is rape. You said no and you did not give consent. At no point did you make it ... | |
| sexual abuse. | 6/26/2008 |
| Q: It must seem like a long time ago I suppose, I was six, he was five which makes it even more ... A: Christina, Yes, you need to get help, more importantly you need to get specialized help, for trauma ... | |
| i was raped | 6/23/2008 |
| Q: i was raped about a year ago and i'm still not over it.. i cry all the time.. do i need help? A: Yes, you need help. I don't know your location, therefore, let me offer you this website ... | |
| is this considered rape? | 6/23/2008 |
| Q: I had originally met this guy back in January, He offered to buy me a beer and the admittance fee ... A: Annie, No thanks needed, I am happy to be able to help and or simply listen. I am happy to hear ... | |
| this probably sounds really stupid ........ | 6/20/2008 |
| Q: i dont really know why excactly i am writing this. i should probably start by saying i wasnt raped. ... A: Jade, No you were not technically raped, which means that he forcibly had sexual intercourse with ... | |
| Counseling... | 6/17/2008 |
| Q: I'm writing to you because I work with families and just got a difficult case, I really want to help ... A: Because this is not your expertise it is perfectly acceptable to tell them that. Also, I would get ... | |
| is this considered rape? | 6/16/2008 |
| Q: I had originally met this guy back in January, He offered to buy me a beer and the admittance fee ... A: Annie, First, I am so sorry that this happened and that your values and morals were ignored. I am ... | |
| Sister Raped | 6/16/2008 |
| Q: I'm 21 yrs old. My sister is 14, she had sex with some guy and my parents found out. They told me ... A: Keniel, I am really happy that you’re sister is getting counseling. I think that in the counseling ... | |
| What else can i do? | 6/1/2008 |
| Q: I have been in a relationship for 6 years with the most wonderful girl i have ever meet. There is ... A: Marc, Keep in mind that you wrote about you. If it had been your girlfriend I would have helped ... | |
| What else can i do? | 5/31/2008 |
| Q: I have been in a relationship for 6 years with the most wonderful girl i have ever meet. There is ... A: Marc, I guess for me I am thinking, what do you want? It seems that you are considering all of her ... | |
| rape? how do i tell my bf or should i? | 5/31/2008 |
| Q: I'm going to do my best to make this so you can actually follow along. This is on my mind everyday, ... A: Teri, I think that before you tell your bf you need to first take care of yourself, come to terms ... | |
| im confused | 5/30/2008 |
| Q: ok well i am 15 and a few months ago i met a guy i started to realy like but i cant tell if he realy ... A: Ashlee, I am confused. Are you in counseling now? Is this counseling focusing on what happened to ... | |
| spousal rape longterm effects | 5/30/2008 |
| Q: I was beaten, repeatedly raped, told I was ugly and stupid every day, and kept under strict ... A: Belinda, Your reactions are understandable considering what you’ve been through. I would ... | |
| So Lost.... | 5/30/2008 |
| Q: It's now 4:30am here in NY and it's been almost 24 hours since i was raped. I don't know ... A: Did you make it to the hospital to have the kit done? You don’t have to prosecute but this way you ... | |
| . | 5/27/2008 |
| Q: i was raped just over ten months ago now. Its taken me so long to finally get a grip and actually ... A: Amber, I am sorry that things didn’t go well when you told your family. I am sorry that you’ve been ... | |
| dealing with the past | 5/26/2008 |
| Q: I'm not really sure how to start this but I'll give it a try. I was molested when i was younger (now ... A: Tina, Yes, you need and deserve to see a professional. For yourself, your 14 year old daughter and ... | |
| girlfriend raped | 5/26/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend has contacted you for some problems of hers. Her name is Shaziah. She has been raped ... A: Al, As for school, maybe she can withdrawal for a semester, to avoid schooling hardships until she ... | |
| problems dealing with my past | 5/26/2008 |
| Q: Kim, in fact, its a link that RAINN provided for my country. There was no response when I called ... A: Al can be with you if that helps,of course! here is an international link to RAINN. ... | |
| Attemted molestation or what? | 5/26/2008 |
| Q: When I was around 7 or 8 years old i was lying flat out on the bed and my older brother and his ... A: Sara, I don’t think that this is clear cut molestation. I don’t know that he meant to harm you. At ... | |
| i was raped 8 years ago | 5/25/2008 |
| Q: and i am still hurt .... i can still feel the pain and i cant live a normal life i dont have a ... A: Wow, I am so sorry. Have you ever gotten help? Talked with someone that can help you sort through ... | |
| 4 years ago I was raped | 5/25/2008 |
| Q: I was raped four years ago this week, and for some reason I am having a really hard time dealing ... A: Michelle, My question to you is, have you or did you get counseling for your rape? Are you coming ... | |
| girlfriend raped | 5/24/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend has contacted you for some problems of hers. Her name is Shaziah. She has been raped ... A: Al, Actually let me share with you that you are doing enough, and what you are doing is really ... | |
| problems dealing with my past | 5/24/2008 |
| Q: I was about 11 yrs when I was like 'forcefully introduced to sex'. At that age, I didn't know ... A: Call which people, the people at RAINN or an agency or organization that RAINN provided? A lot of ... | |
| Rape? | 5/24/2008 |
| Q: I asked this of one of the others but she couldn't respond. How long does it usually take to ... A: Connie, There’s no time frame of healing. Each person needs to heal in their own time. You said ... | |
| sex-obsessed after sexual assault | 5/23/2008 |
| Q: I was sexually assaulted at a fraternity formal in November 2007. It was extremely hard for me to ... A: Cassie, I think it’s important that you know that this can be common. I am not saying that all ... | |
| i was raped 8 years ago | 5/22/2008 |
| Q: and i am still hurt .... i can still feel the pain and i cant live a normal life i dont have a ... A: Carmen, When you say that you can still feel the pain, are you feeling that pain emotionally or are ... | |
| I was raped last night | 5/20/2008 |
| Q: I returned to town after being away for a few months. A friend let me use her house to have a BBQ ... A: Lane, I am so sorry! Wow! I don’t live in Idaho, so it helps a great deal that you shared that with ... | |
| Rape | 5/19/2008 |
| Q: I was raped back in December, I just got back into high school and the kids are mean as hell to me. ... A: I am so sorry that the kids ate school are doing this to you. I am assuming that you have a ... | |
| problems dealing with my past | 5/19/2008 |
| Q: I was about 11 yrs when I was like 'forcefully introduced to sex'. At that age, I didn't know ... A: Shaziah, I would definitely talk to Al, let him help you and with him knowing he will be more ... | |
| problems dealing with my past | 5/16/2008 |
| Q: I was about 11 yrs when I was like 'forcefully introduced to sex'. At that age, I didn't know ... A: Shaziah, You were sexually abused and you need and deserve counseling that can help you process ... | |
| what happened to me? | 5/12/2008 |
| Q: Wow, where to start. Well, I’m 16 years old and almost 17 now. Well, when I was 11 years old my mom ... A: Feeling ashamed is a very normal feeling, but let me say this; you have nothing to be ashamed of. ... | |
| friend found out i was raped and flipped out | 5/11/2008 |
| Q: I told a friend of mine that I was raped 4 years ago and he totally flipped out saying he needed to ... A: Ashley, I sounds like your friend is in denial over what happened to you. Try to give him time and ... | |
| Rape | 5/7/2008 |
| Q: I was raped yesterday when I agreed to meet my friend for sex. I was at his house and we were really ... A: Tomi, You need to get into counseling. I think it continues to happen because you’ve lost your ... | |
| Am I being pathetic? | 5/3/2008 |
| Q: Compared to everyone else here, I've got nothing to complain about. I guess you can call my attacker ... A: Emma, It’s so much better to say sexually assaulted and your case is the reason why. You do not ... | |
| girlfriend raped | 5/2/2008 |
| Q: I could use some advice, I have a girlfriend I love dearly. We are both 20, and she had a boyfriend ... A: Jason, First, let me apologize for my delay. I didn’t receive your question. So I am sorry for not ... | |
| jamskateman@yahoo.com | 5/2/2008 |
| Q: Kim i wanted to ask you this question because you seem to know a lot about this type of stuff. I ... A: Ray, Clarify what do you mean she was blacked out? Like she passed out and you were having sex ... | |
| rape | 4/30/2008 |
| Q: My situation is really confusing. Im going to try and explain it the best way possible. I went on ... A: I absolutely can and do understand you’re upset. I also understand that you feel that you didn’t ... | |
| How can i help | 4/30/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and myself broke up, because when she was 13 she was molested several times by her ... A: It may very well change, but, it also may change for the better, because she’ll be in a better ... | |
| How can i help | 4/28/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and myself broke up, because when she was 13 she was molested several times by her ... A: Justin, I guess my question is do you want to stay and wait for her it sounds like that is your ... | |
| i dont know | 4/20/2008 |
| Q: im not sure this is the right way for me. iv treid everything though and nothing has helped yet. im ... A: Carla, Yes, yes, you need help! Are you getting help currently? Have you ever seen someone who ... | |
| wife raped | 4/17/2008 |
| Q: Kim, My wife was at a gathering at a house at the beach. She drank too much and she said she passed ... A: Mark, I can’t assume. It’s hard to know what happened or could have happened. The only way to ... | |
| rape | 4/16/2008 |
| Q: will I ever feel normal again? A: Yes, Dee, you can be normal again. But, you need help to get there. You can’t do this alone. No one ... | |
| was i raped | 4/6/2008 |
| Q: i had my eldest child in march 2005 and soon after she was born my partner at the time threaten to ... A: Jayne, It’s not fair to you to be forced to love someone. The child is innocent and she was not ... | |
| Statutory Rape | 4/5/2008 |
| Q: Recently, a man I had sexual contact with was found guilty of Criminal Sex Acts. I was only 16 and ... A: Dakota, Yes, it is considered rape, and usually when you are as young as you are you don’t ... | |
| was i raped | 4/3/2008 |
| Q: i had my eldest child in march 2005 and soon after she was born my partner at the time threaten to ... A: Jayne, I think that you absolutely were/are a victim of rape. Just because you are dating or ... | |
| rape | 3/30/2008 |
| Q: i need help i was raped at age 11 and im 16 now and it effects everything i do i get these smells ... A: What you’re describing here sounds like what we call “Triggers”. ... | |
| raped as a child | 3/27/2008 |
| Q: This is not about myself, but for my girlfriend of 6 yrs. who I love with all my heart. Recently she ... A: First of all, I am so sorry to hear about your girlfriend and I wish you all the best as she heals. ... | |
| feeling like I lack support | 3/24/2008 |
| Q: Since the rape, I feel like I want to go out all the time and be around people much more. Like I ... A: Alison, Why can’t you get help now? Are you underage? What happens in the mean time? Your need to ... | |
| was i raped? | 3/23/2008 |
| Q: when i was younger i was very aware of sex. when i say young i mean 6 or 7. i knew all about it. i ... A: Marie, It’s possible that you were a victim and are suppressing memory of it because you are too ... | |
| rape? | 3/21/2008 |
| Q: This didn’t bother me until it was currently brought up, I’m not sure if you would consider this ... A: Ok, so your seizures are a result of Conversion Disorder and the seizures may actually be your ... | |
| is it normal? | 3/20/2008 |
| Q: I was raped 5 months ago and I've developed a fear of sex and fear of men. I'm worried i'll never ... A: Alison, Keep in mind being a lesbian isn’t something that you learn to be. However, some do feel ... | |
| rape? | 3/20/2008 |
| Q: This didn’t bother me until it was currently brought up, I’m not sure if you would consider this ... A: What kinds of tests are being done? You can’t prove that you were raped this much past the rapes ... | |
| Girlfriend and Me | 3/18/2008 |
| Q: From the ages of 6 to 8 years old i was sexually assaulted by three different men in three separate ... A: Ian, First, I am so sorry that you too were assaulted and I ask that you don’t forget your needs ... | |
| is it normal? | 3/18/2008 |
| Q: I was raped 5 months ago and I've developed a fear of sex and fear of men. I'm worried i'll never ... A: I didn’t feel anything romantically or sexually with or for men either, in fact I almost developed ... | |
| I don't understand what I happened? | 3/17/2008 |
| Q: I need help understanding what happened to me. I was at a party and this guy kept flirting with me, ... A: Steven, He was wrong. He was not drinking and you were you’re right alcohol should not be an ... | |
| is it normal? | 3/17/2008 |
| Q: I was raped 5 months ago and I've developed a fear of sex and fear of men. I'm worried i'll never ... A: Alison, I will be very honest with you. I had this fear and feeling as I started to heal and ... | |
| rape | 2/28/2008 |
| Q: i dont no to feel stupid or say it wasnt my fault. i was at this party and this boy said he wanted ... A: The getting sick to your stomach is mostly nerves and anxiety for what's you've been through. Can ... | |
| rape | 2/27/2008 |
| Q: i dont no to feel stupid or say it wasnt my fault. i was at this party and this boy said he wanted ... A: This is considered rape. You did all that you could and it sounds like at this point you simply ... | |
| Raped by Brothers when very young | 2/21/2008 |
| Q: When I was young....I don't remember my age. It must have been betweern 4 and 8. I started being ... A: Susie, You really should get some counseling, because it is very likely that these memories will ... | |
| Rape. | 2/19/2008 |
| Q: i would really like your help with my situation. my name is brittani, i was 13 when i experienced ... A: So if they did a rape kit they should have evidence of the rape (s). Scaring is a good indication of ... | |
| what to do? | 2/18/2008 |
| Q: i dont know really how to put all this so i will just wright if it does not make sense let me know! ... A: Sam, It breaks me heart to read of your pain and struggles. At 24 how is it that they still have ... | |
| Rape. | 2/18/2008 |
| Q: i would really like your help with my situation. my name is brittani, i was 13 when i experienced ... A: Brittani, I have questions. What happened when you went to the hospital? Did they do the rape kit? ... | |
| He reminds me of my attacker | 2/8/2008 |
| Q: I was raped a couple years ago when i was 18 by a friend..pretty violently. I never reported it and ... A: It makes complete sense to me that you don’t want him to almost role play your rape. I do not agree ... | |
| He reminds me of my attacker | 2/6/2008 |
| Q: I was raped a couple years ago when i was 18 by a friend..pretty violently. I never reported it and ... A: As scary as that sounds… I think I would also agree with the therapists that you’ve already talked ... | |
| Wife was raped during marriage | 1/27/2008 |
| Q: My wife and I have recently been going through a low in our 4 years of marriage. We just got out of ... A: Josh, When did the rape occur? You said it was a few weeks and it wasn’t clear if that talk started ... | |
| Question about possible childhood sexual abuse | 1/23/2008 |
| Q: I am currently in counseling for numerous reasons, and wanted to get your opinion. I have always ... A: I am researching the bedwetting to see if there are correlations that are documented. I will get ... | |
| Question about possible childhood sexual abuse | 1/23/2008 |
| Q: I am currently in counseling for numerous reasons, and wanted to get your opinion. I have always ... A: Yes, it is very possible that we suppress our memories of early child abuse. The bed wetting I’m ... | |
| recovery | 1/19/2008 |
| Q: I was raped when i was 16 at work by a collegue! I never felt i wanted to report it as i just wanted ... A: Sarah, No you won’t always feel this way. But at this point you do need to get into therapy, and I ... | |
| I need to tak | 1/17/2008 |
| Q: I am thirty-one year old single mother of a 2 1/2 year old little girl. When I was 18, my freshman ... A: Jennifer, I am so sorry that this happened to you, and sorry that after ten years you are still ... | |
| I was rape by my babysitter. | 1/14/2008 |
| Q: My name is Lauren. I am 14 years old and I was Raped by my babysitter 18 times over the course of 4 ... A: Lauren, I’m sorry that you didn’t get it; I wonder what happened to it… Anyways, to a degree it’s ... | |
| my father | 1/12/2008 |
| Q: my father has been abusing me 4 2 weeks i dont like it because he goes 'all the way' with me and ... A: Danny, How old are you? What is your relationship like with your mum? It’s very common for the ... | |
| Raped in Abusive Relationship | 1/12/2008 |
| Q: How do I put this behind me? I think about it often. A: Susan, Actually, the best way to “put this behind you” is to get involved in Cognitive therapy. ... | |
| I was rape by my babysitter. | 1/10/2008 |
| Q: My name is Lauren. I am 14 years old and I was Raped by my babysitter 18 times over the course of 4 ... A: Lauren, I think that a few things could be happening here. Let’s look at how small children ... | |
| raped by a parent | 1/8/2008 |
| Q: Ok, since I can remember my father has been semi-raping me.. And he keeps telling me if I tell my ... A: Leighanna, I can’t imagine keeping this secret. Do you have any other options? These are real ... | |
| How can I support my girlfriend? | 1/4/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend was raped when she was 17. When we try to pleasure each other she gets flashbacks and ... A: Richard, I think I am going to agree with her counselor. I think that this is the best option for ... | |
| what do I do? | 1/3/2008 |
| Q: I was raped multiple times in the span of the month of october. I met this guy through a friend and ... A: Exam costs that are criminally based are at no charge (usually). You could also check with a ... | |
| my stepfather used to ____ me | 1/2/2008 |
| Q: I am 18. Back when i was 9 my mother got pregnant with my half sister from her then-husband/my ... A: Holly, I am sorry that you are going through this. You haven’t “forgotten” what I think you are ... | |
| what do I do? | 1/2/2008 |
| Q: I was raped multiple times in the span of the month of october. I met this guy through a friend and ... A: Alison, I am sorry that this happened to you. That he didn’t listen to you. At this point a ... | |
| Rape | 1/1/2008 |
| Q: How can I help a friend who feels the rape was her fault, because she invited the man up to her ... A: Lisa, You are right; she needs to talk to someone. Here is a link. www.rainn.org. The site gives ... | |
| Scared and Hurt | 12/29/2007 |
| Q: I have been seriously taken advantage of by older men and I feel like a have a big sign on me ... A: Kelsey, Wow, I could just feel the pain in this email. I feel for you so much! I also can relate ... | |
| how is it | 12/28/2007 |
| Q: I've always wondered how do rape conseling go? Like what kind of questions do they ask you in there? A: Usually rape counseling is comparable to other counseling sessions. Only the things they cover are ... | |
| i hurt | 12/27/2007 |
| Q: Last night my boyfriend sexually assaulted me in my bottom and my vagina. Im so sore. I dont know ... A: Gemma, This relationship sounds very toxic and abusive. I mean just the way that he isolates you, ... | |
| My wife was date raped | 12/26/2007 |
| Q: This morning I found out that my wife's boss date raped her. She come home from work yesterday in a ... A: Chris, She’s acting out in her pain. She’s in pain and she needs some time. Can you seek help for ... | |
| My wife was date raped | 12/25/2007 |
| Q: This morning I found out that my wife's boss date raped her. She come home from work yesterday in a ... A: Chris, Boy, this is a really hard place to be. I would certainly encourage her to be checked out, ... | |
| I don't know whats wrong with me | 12/22/2007 |
| Q: I was sexually abused for the first time when I was five years old, then when I was seven and then ... A: Samara, It’s a very powerful statement to say “I don’t want to be the victim anymore”. I am proud ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped...now what? | 12/18/2007 |
| Q: My girlfriend was raped about two months ago. We have been together for three years. I was out of ... A: Hmm… did you click on the link “Find a Local Crisis Center” did you enter a zip code? Also, most ... | |
| my girlfriend was raped...now what? | 12/18/2007 |
| Q: My girlfriend was raped about two months ago. We have been together for three years. I was out of ... A: Jim, It is understandable that you feel this way. Is she more intimate or sexual than she was ... | |
| I just need help | 12/14/2007 |
| Q: Bear with me, because my thoughts are all over the place. I’ve been seeing this guy for about 4 ... A: Zee, Every day that you stay there, this pain goes deeper, can you stay with a friend and get help, ... | |
| sex life | 12/13/2007 |
| Q: i was brutally raped twice in my mid teens and I'm 20 now. one of the rapes i told my mom and a few ... A: Jen, It sounds like the drugs and possibly alcohol were your coping skills, and the problem with ... | |
| rape | 12/12/2007 |
| Q: i was raped 5 years ago and i never really thought about it. it was never really real. now it is and ... A: Lorla, Counseling will be hard for awhile, but, please stay with it. I started an online journal ... | |
| .. | 12/11/2007 |
| Q: When i was 14 i was on a family holiday, i met some friends of roughly the same age as me, we were ... A: Katie, It sounded like you were maybe overseas? In case you are in the states, I will offer you ... | |
| i was rape 9 years ago and i think about it all the times | 12/9/2007 |
| Q: i was rape when i was 8 years old. Now I'm 17, and i think about a lot. When that happens i get very ... A: Esmy, I think in order for you to heal from this, you need to work through this and in order to ... | |
| was this rape? | 12/9/2007 |
| Q: one night last july i went out drinking with a few of my friends. 3 guys were there and this one kid ... A: Sarah, A few things here, this actually will depend on your local laws. But... if you are 16 and he ... | |
| i have a problem | 12/9/2007 |
| Q: i have a really wonderful girlfriend, i just have a little problem which is that i find it hard to ... A: Mon, I guess it’s even harder for me to think that anyone could think that rape was enjoyable. Do ... | |
| hi | 12/5/2007 |
| Q: i am still very scared i have problems going to school and even going out of the house what do i do? ... A: Becky, A lot of people struggle to talk at first and usually this is due to trust issues that will ... | |
| my girlfriend | 12/5/2007 |
| Q: i'm 15 and i have a girlfriend who is getting abused by her friend,i dont even know who the kid is ... A: Mark, If she is being abused and is threatening to take her life is goes beyond coming here for ... | |
| How to keep from wanting revenge | 12/4/2007 |
| Q: My wife was raped by her former boss more than a year ago. I just found out 3 days ago. I want blood ... A: Robert, It’s completely understandable that you have these extreme emotions. But, hurting your ... | |
| Is this considered rape? | 11/30/2007 |
| Q: I have been married for over five years now and yesterday I experienced something that has never ... A: Courtney, Yes, this is rape. Marital rape, you do not have an obligation to have sex just because ... | |
| rape memory loss | 11/29/2007 |
| Q: When I was 22 I went through a rape. I took someone home to their apt. no intentions of having sex, ... A: Laticia, Wow, first of you can not blame yourself for either of these rapes. I am so happy to ... | |
| Two Pasts Collide | 11/28/2007 |
| Q: I was emotionally and sexually abused by my boyfriend when I was a teenager. It was a decade before ... A: Krissy, How kind of you to want to help him! But do not forget your own pain and the fact that ... | |
| marital rape | 11/27/2007 |
| Q: i have a research paper to do in my english class and had a variety of topics to choose frm. i chose ... A: I don’t have real good questions, but maybe just thoughts that you can expand on? Or maybe they are ... | |
| Raped | 11/17/2007 |
| Q: i was raped when i was in first grade i haven't told anybody but 3 or 4 of my closest friends my ... A: You’re right, rape isn’t funny and sex isn’t always about love. In fact, it can be very hurtful and ... | |
| Men need help too. | 11/16/2007 |
| Q: When my friend was a teenager, his girlfriend was gang raped by members of the police force while a ... A: Lisa, I was a little confused. Your friend witnessed his girlfriend and then was attacked himself? ... | |
| Not sure if this is considered rape/sexually assaulted or not. | 11/14/2007 |
| Q: Less than a year ago I was dating this guy that I knew for around 5 years. He's about 4 years older ... A: Jane, It’s clear to me that what happened that night has had a lasting and traumatic affect on you, ... | |
| GIrlfriend was raped | 11/14/2007 |
| Q: I love her so much. About 4 months ago she was raped. It was horrible. we were together 3 months at ... A: Charles, Maybe you also can see a counselor or her counselor can refer you? It’s hard for couples. ... | |
| How do i deal with being raped? | 11/4/2007 |
| Q: During the summer, about three months ago, i got into a fight with my mom,i went over to my guy ... A: Kayte, This is a critical time in your life where your sexual identity is forming, so it’s very ... | |
| abused friend | 11/2/2007 |
| Q: I asked about this a little while ago, but my answer wasnt exactly clear. I need to know what to do ... A: Lauren, Your friend should do the reporting herself; however, you can report this as a concerned ... | |
| raped | 11/1/2007 |
| Q: ..I was raped late last year twice... first by a friend, and later by my boyfriend.. I was drunk and ... A: Leah, I think the first step is acknowledging your pain for yourself; you have to believe and face ... | |
| my girlfriend needs me. | 11/1/2007 |
| Q: I ve been going out with my girlfriend for a few weeks. the first week into it she told me shed been ... A: Nick, I think this is past what you are able to do for your girlfriend, do you think that she can ... | |
| Not sure where to start... | 11/1/2007 |
| Q: I was just raped this past Saturday night/Sunday morning. I have a very colorful past. Former Marine ... A: Carrie, I think your emotions will help you, so long as you don’t hide behind them. I think as far ... | |
| sexually assaulted 29 year ago | 10/31/2007 |
| Q: Tammy A: Tammy, I am wondering if the triggers and repressed emotions are not coming forth now because you ... | |
| i am weak | 10/31/2007 |
| Q: For several months a man who is 14 years my senior kept making sexual advances. I didn't think much ... A: I understand your worry, your upset, and it’s a natural reaction with abuse and victimization. You ... | |
| How to talk about rape | 10/31/2007 |
| Q: Just as a lil background- I was raped by my ex boyfriend about 4-5 years ago. We were in a ... A: Taylor, I don’t think that there is a easy way to start or have this conversation. I think that ... | |
| i am weak | 10/30/2007 |
| Q: For several months a man who is 14 years my senior kept making sexual advances. I didn't think much ... A: Cj, You are not weak; you are getting the attention that you need. It’s classic of victims of ... | |
| I don't know if it was my fault or his.... | 10/29/2007 |
| Q: There's this guy that's really into me, and we had kissed before, but last night things got pretty ... A: Shannon, I’m sorry that this happened. Yes this is rape. You told him no, and he knew that you ... | |
| rape by spouse | 10/27/2007 |
| Q: my husband and I have been together for nearly 13 years. Many of our sexual experiences have been my ... A: Susie, You’re right, even married couples have individual rights and he still needs consent in ... | |
| Rape | 10/27/2007 |
| Q: I went to a party with friends and came home bruised and very very sore all over. its been a week ... A: Are you in the states? If not can you tell me a general area of where you are? If you are in the ... | |
| ignored, but my fault | 10/26/2007 |
| Q: I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. Very in love with him and he has been my best friend. I ... A: Chloe, Have you ever been a victim of sexual abuse prior to the affair that originally hurt your ... | |
| too long | 10/25/2007 |
| Q: last summer i was fingered by my then boyfriend, i told him no, but he continued anyway. (Is ... A: Barbie, I think it’s very difficult to get through something like this without professional help ... | |
| not sure I was part of incest ? | 10/25/2007 |
| Q: I have been married for 20 years. All my adult life I have been emotionally messed up and don't know ... A: Heidi, Sounds like suppressed memories are finding the way to the surface, this could be happening ... | |
| Help! | 10/25/2007 |
| Q: Well since i was born until I was 4, my wee sisters dad raped me and I am finding it so hard to deal ... A: Kat, Do your foster parents know? Do you live in the states or over seas… I ask only because I’d ... | |
| incest | 10/24/2007 |
| Q: My daughter, who is now 24 years old, recently told me that she was molested by her father as a ... A: Sammy, I think that when you discuss this with your other daughter with the permission of your ... | |
| just wanna know!!! | 10/24/2007 |
| Q: Hey ok well i got sexually abused when i was 9 or 10 by my own cousin and i didnt tell anyone and ... A: Annie, Have you been hospitalized? Have you or are you receiving counseling? At 20 years old you ... | |
| i blocked out a rape for almost 8 years... | 10/24/2007 |
| Q: I am 25. When I was 16 or 17 (Im not really sure of my age because I blocked it out and literally ... A: Randi, You blocked this out as a survival skill. You were not in the position at that time to ... | |
| i need help | 10/23/2007 |
| Q: please bare with me. I am 20 years old, and i was raped when i was 15. this is the first time i am ... A: Lacey, I think that the manipulation and the unhealthy nature of your friendship and even your past ... | |
| Date rape | 10/22/2007 |
| Q: I have a few questions that have been on my mind, and i do not know if this is the right link to ask ... A: Anna, Good questions. My question is why did he need to resort to drugging you? This says that he ... | |
| i should have known better | 10/20/2007 |
| Q: back when i was 18 i had a bf that i had crushed on for 2 years before we started dating... we ... A: April, I would agree with you about what happened one of my attackers had this same reaction. I ... | |
| Dealing with rape 30 yrs later | 10/19/2007 |
| Q: I watched a Lifetime movie on TV involving the rape of a housewife whose husband was a police ... A: Leslie, I am so sorry for what you’ve been through and what you are going through. This is hard ... | |
| hopeless | 10/18/2007 |
| Q: He comes into my bedroom at the same time every night. I always look at the clock an hour before I ... A: Wow, this truly broke my heart to read. How old are you? Who’s doing this to you? I am really ... | |
| Dealing with her rape | 10/16/2007 |
| Q: My girlfriend whom I love very much was raped at 6. The last time she was, in her terms, really in ... A: William, You said it yourself communication needs to be open. I couldn’t agree with you more. It ... | |
| a friend just clued me into her possible rape | 10/16/2007 |
| Q: a good friend & Ex of mine I've known for the last 9 months just clued me in that she was raped..Not ... A: Scott, The most important thing to do with this relationship like any other relationship is to have ... | |
| My boyfriend was molested by his sister | 10/11/2007 |
| Q: I absolutely adore my 33 yr old boyfriend and I am having such a hard time coping with his ... A: Mary, I do understand your feelings here. It makes sense, but my concern is what are you giving up ... | |
| Rape or Chetaing? | 10/10/2007 |
| Q: I am currently a college student and this concerns my ex-girlfriend (20 months together). This past ... A: Isaac, It could have been rape. Her reaction may be that of denial, or shame that she cheated. ... | |
| My boyfriend was molested by his sister | 10/9/2007 |
| Q: I absolutely adore my 33 yr old boyfriend and I am having such a hard time coping with his ... A: Mary, I really feel for your boyfriend. I can’t imagine the prison that he lives in. I do however ... | |
| my girlfriend | 10/9/2007 |
| Q: my girlfriend spend a year of her life with a man that beat and raped her before she could escape ... A: Joe, Is there a reason why she’s refusing counseling? I would just check on local agencies, and ... | |
| Trying to make sense of it all. | 10/9/2007 |
| Q: I've been dealing with abuse for a long time. My mother used to have violent fits when I was a child ... A: Jane, As for telling your current boyfriend, if nothing else save this email and let him read it. ... | |
| my girlfriend | 10/8/2007 |
| Q: my girlfriend spend a year of her life with a man that beat and raped her before she could escape ... A: Joe, 2 or 3 years is not a long time to recover after living in that environment and having those ... | |
| i feel so alone | 9/28/2007 |
| Q: i was raped 2weeks ago. my case was droped because i was pased you . and i woke up and i pushed him ... A: Melissa, They dropped your case because why? You were passed out? That doesn’t decide your case, ... | |
| Raped By My Brother | 9/28/2007 |
| Q: last week my brother came home drunk, came straight to my room and asked me for sex. i refused, but ... A: Sam, You can not continue to do this, and your brother is using your illness to his gain. Have ... | |
| just wanting to get to kno myself again | 9/20/2007 |
| Q: my name is rae, i was raped in nov/06, it hasent been a year yet, i have been keeping a low ... A: Rae, Let me offer a little help in finding a counselor. www.rainn.org has specialized therapy that ... | |
| Healing Process | 9/15/2007 |
| Q: I was raped when I was 18 and I was a virgin. I grew up in a very sheltered and religious home so ... A: Drea, It’s common for this to happen. The journal is a great idea, I do this too. I love writing ... | |
| Still sore... | 9/13/2007 |
| Q: It has been a very long time since it happened, and I have dealt with it on multiple occasions, each ... A: Jen, I am happy that you were so honest and detailed. Don’t apologize, it’s Ok. I am really ... | |
| rape | 9/9/2007 |
| Q: I live in England. Recently i have tried so hard to try and change, however it is now at the stage ... A: Stacy, What you describe here, when you say that your mind and body don’t work together when you ... | |
| forced to submit and to have sex | 9/8/2007 |
| Q: I had no idea that there was such a thing as "male rape" until this site (and others) was brought to ... A: Landon, I can definitely understand the need and want to have your life back and not have this ... | |
| My sister was raped by two men | 9/7/2007 |
| Q: My sister is 44 years old as of yesterday. The day before her birthday she stopped at a store to buy ... A: Donna, With your past, you are rightfully scared and upset. I am worried for your sister too. I ... | |
| rape controlled my life for too long now. | 9/6/2007 |
| Q: I was raped two days after my 12th birthday, and until recently i had never told anyone. I always ... A: Stacy, First of all, I think you’ve already started making changes in your life. Which means you ... | |
| RAPE | 9/6/2007 |
| Q: My friend was raped about 6 months ago. I dont talk to her about it. She gets in moods n has such ... A: Jay, Let me offer you a link. www.rainn.org. They can help you, also, they will have a locator on ... | |
| rape | 9/5/2007 |
| Q: i was raped 3 years ago and i am just now in the steps of telling my mother and getting help....can ... A: Angie, I would never discourage you from pressing charges, I am happy to hear that you are getting ... | |
| rape | 9/4/2007 |
| Q: i really need some help when i was a child i was sexually abused by my grandad i told my mum when i ... A: Gemma, Are you in the states? Get a safety plan ASAP. Go to a place that is safe and somewhere ... | |
| girlfriend raped - being supportive | 9/3/2007 |
| Q: My girlfriend is 24. She was raped twice when she was 3 & 4 years of age. She remembers some ... A: David, I always recommend that people have been abused that they seek counseling. If she’s never ... | |
| rape | 9/2/2007 |
| Q: before christmas i was out in a club and very drunk.i remmember my friends ex coming over and ... A: Lauren, No, this isn’t your fault, and it’s not your fault because you drank. Rape is an act of ... | |
| rape | 9/2/2007 |
| Q: I need help! i was 17 and the guy was 19. I was drinking and he talked to me about how upset i was ... A: Elizabeth, I think this was manipulation and you did what you had to do to have it be over. You ... | |
| my friend go raped | 9/2/2007 |
| Q: my friend got raped by the boyfriend off her mother when she was 8 years old.she tryed to tell her ... A: It really needs to come from your friend. I would encourage you to tell your friend to talk with ... | |
| getting better | 9/1/2007 |
| Q: Around this time a year ago I was first beginning college. It was at college that I had my first ... A: Bridget, I am so sorry. I think that having a father that is a psychiatrist must be so hard. Are ... | |
| Was it Rape?? | 9/1/2007 |
| Q: I would like to start by saying I was sexually abused by a man in my neighborhood from age 5-10. I ... A: Lindsey, Because of your past, you may be unable to process what happened and maybe your mind is ... | |
| helping a spouse | 8/31/2007 |
| Q: are the rape counseling hot lines going to be able to help me with my problem much ? or am i best to ... A: Ryan, She probably very much wants to be with you, but, just can’t emotionally, physically, and ... | |
| I've just lost my girlfriend who can't seem to recover from her rape | 8/31/2007 |
| Q: My name is Dennis, I'm 20 years old, from Israel. I serve in the Israeli Defense Forces. I've read ... A: Dennis, I understand your heart break and upset. I think that you’re right that, this isn’t about ... | |
| Relationships after rape | 8/30/2007 |
| Q: Not really sure where to start, but here goes. When I was a child, I was abused by a member of my ... A: Charlene, I am only going to give you my personal email as this answer and ask that you send me an ... | |
| Rape or dream? | 8/30/2007 |
| Q: I'm writing in on behalf of my sister who is in a very difficult situation. She found out last week ... A: Catherine, Wow, it’s possible that this dream was in fact reality, but, it will be hard to prove. ... | |
| I dont know what to think | 8/30/2007 |
| Q: A year and a half ago, i was with a guy i liked in a ravine, he bought me beer. I drank it and was ... A: Steph, I am wondering if this was rape or maybe he was just taking advantage of your state. Not ... | |
| Relationships after rape | 8/29/2007 |
| Q: Not really sure where to start, but here goes. When I was a child, I was abused by a member of my ... A: Charlene, My heart broke as I read this. I am so so sorry. I guess this story; hit me hard, ... | |
| My Wife And My Stupidity I'm Lost | 8/29/2007 |
| Q: This might seem a little long but i'm lost and really need some advice. Me and my wife grew up ... A: Bill, Sounds like you both need counseling. Here is a link www.rainn.org. They can help you locate ... | |
| I am not sure if this is my fault. | 8/28/2007 |
| Q: I went to a friends house expecting it to be herself and I casually drinking and having a girls ... A: Maria, I really believe that he would have raped you if that person had not come into the room, but ... | |
| My girlfriend was raped | 8/28/2007 |
| Q: My girlfriend recently confided in me that she was raped when she was 15 while away on a holiday. ... A: Andrew, First, let me tell you that I commend you for all that you are doing for your girlfriend. ... | |
| RAPE | 8/27/2007 |
| Q: My niece was raped by her stepfather. She does not want to talk about it. She says she is fine. ... A: Ouma, Laughter may be the only way she is able to express her emotion right now. She may be ... | |
| Changed | 8/27/2007 |
| Q: I've been sexually assulted by my ex boyfriend once 3 yrs ago. the 2nd time about 3 weeks ago.. when ... A: Tabitha, Can you consider maybe couples counseling? This may help him as well as you. It’s natural ... | |
| Help | 8/27/2007 |
| Q: When I was 18 I got married to whom I then thought was the man of my dreams yeah right now I know he ... A: Gin, First of all, you were being raped. Because you were married it would be considered spousal ... | |
| Changed | 8/26/2007 |
| Q: I've been sexually assulted by my ex boyfriend once 3 yrs ago. the 2nd time about 3 weeks ago.. when ... A: Tabitha, I am so sorry. Do you think that it’s wrong to be with your fiancé or wrong to be sexual ... | |
| rape | 8/25/2007 |
| Q: okay this is a very hard thing for me to talk about. i'm currently 15 and about 2 year ago i was ... A: Jaycie, I really am a firm believer in just saying it like it is. It won’t be easier making up ... | |
| Man Being raped | 8/24/2007 |
| Q: I was wondering How does a Guy get over being Raped. When it happened to me I was actually in jail ... A: Ronald, I am sorry that you are going through so much. I hope that with time we’ll be able to ... | |
| my sister was molested | 8/23/2007 |
| Q: im 22 & my 19 yr old sis was molested by my bestpal.she only told me last week so i felt bad.my ... A: Mike, Is she talking with you? How do you see her, do you think that she’s handling this ok? Is ... | |
| i was raped by my boyfriend in my sleep | 8/23/2007 |
| Q: i was raped in my sleep by my boyfriend and woke up and found out he was on top of me raping me i ... A: Lisa, The self injury is the way that you cope right now, and will lead to an addiction, in fact, ... | |
| I was raped 4 years ago next sunday... | 8/23/2007 |
| Q: It happened on my 18th Birthday by my exboyfriend he was my ex at the time. I wasn't supposed to be ... A: Jeanette, I am concerned mostly for you. I understand your worries about your daughter, and that’s ... | |
| rape | 8/23/2007 |
| Q: okay this is a very hard thing for me to talk about. i'm currently 15 and about 2 year ago i was ... A: Jaycie, I am happy to hear that you are regaining your life. I do however; feel that you need to ... | |
| i dont know but i do | 8/22/2007 |
| Q: i am now an 18 years old girl. when i was 15 i went to a party with some older friends , i blacked ... A: Jessica, I definitely think that you should get into counseling. Here’s a link to people who can ... | |
| Children by Rape | 8/22/2007 |
| Q: My ex-boyfriend started raping me after a little less than a year had gone by. It started out slow ... A: Kari, I am so sorry. How horrible for you. I am happy to hear that you are in counseling. I truly ... | |
| i was raped by my boyfriend in my sleep | 8/21/2007 |
| Q: i was raped in my sleep by my boyfriend and woke up and found out he was on top of me raping me i ... A: Lisa, Is it possible that he left because of what happened? How much time has passed since the ... | |
| I was raped 4 years ago next sunday... | 8/21/2007 |
| Q: It happened on my 18th Birthday by my exboyfriend he was my ex at the time. I wasn't supposed to be ... A: Jeannette, It happens so often. This controlling way, the manipulation, the breaking down of your ... | |
| breakup after the rape | 8/8/2007 |
| Q: A month ago I was raped at gunpoint. I was going to go to a club with my boyfriend and his friends ... A: Jayce, I am so sorry that you are going through this. I am sorry that your boyfriend left you ... | |
| Coping and understanding the rape of my daughter and the mood swings | 8/7/2007 |
| Q: This is rather a longUp until recently my daughter was seeing a man 16 years older than herself. He ... A: Judith, At this point, you do need let your daughter do her thing. One, because it is hurting you ... | |
| I don't know | 8/6/2007 |
| Q: I don't really know what's wrong with me. I'm 17 years old, and I've had 10 years to move on after ... A: Heather, Because I do not know your location, I do not know the laws in your state. Rainn or ... | |
| How do I get over it? | 8/4/2007 |
| Q: 2 years ago I went to a party with a friend and we stayed over. I'd had a lot to drink and slept on ... A: Jo, I am concerned for you. I know that you don’t want to get help. I know the idea is scary for ... | |
| tough no more | 8/3/2007 |
| Q: I am a female to male transgendered individual. About six months ago I met the most wonderful woman ... A: Gene, Wow, the manipulation here is horrible. The forcing of sex is still there, and the emotional ... | |
| physical effects of rape | 8/2/2007 |
| Q: My virgin girlfriend was raped recently after she passed out at a party. She has recovered and she ... A: Evan, The only true difference is that her Hymen is likely broken. The hymen is a thin layer of ... | |
| Did my dad abuse me | 7/23/2007 |
| Q: from about the age of about 8 i think, my dad would try and kiss me in a way i didn't like! he would ... A: Dawn, I definitely think that your father did take your innocence. It’s possible that things ... | |
| raped as a child | 7/22/2007 |
| Q: I am almost 51 years old. As a child I was raped, most of my life I blocked it all out. Now, my ... A: Raeford, This sounds a lot like body memories. No matter how much we try to block out the ... | |
| My wife raped | 7/21/2007 |
| Q: Recently during my holiday, I and my wife has been robbed at gun point. She has been raped and I was ... A: Joseph, Why doesn’t she want to go to a counselor or doctor? She needs help to process this. I ... | |
| I never called it rape | 7/21/2007 |
| Q: and even now I still have doubts that it was. This happened 4 years ago. I drank so much that ... A: Kari, I am assuming that the reason why you had sex with him the next morning was because you ... | |
| Not sure | 7/18/2007 |
| Q: I met a guy about a year and a half ago, and we are doing good and happy he cares for me and we love ... A: Jamie or Carry Anne, I thought I had answered this. I apologize. Age doesn’t matter. But, as for ... | |
| Help? | 7/18/2007 |
| Q: Im 15. I was sexually abused and raped repeatingly from the age 6 to 11. Then, my cousin who was ... A: Sam, Staying at home… may have prevented this, but, there’s no way of finding that out now. So, ... | |
| Wife kidnapped, beaten and gang raped while being filmed! | 7/6/2007 |
| Q: German single guy moved to the UK 5 years ago and eventually got married. Unfortunately wife became ... A: Uli, I can't speak for you. But, If you feel this strongly, I don't think that you should stay ... | |
| Almost a year and I still am having problems | 7/4/2007 |
| Q: I was raped almost a year ago. This guy found my yahoo screen name online and started IM'ing me. To ... A: Tania, First, they way that they are treating you at work, is illegal in and of itself. I would ... | |
| confussed | 7/3/2007 |
| Q: i was asleep one night the i was awaken by someone kissing me i know who WA kissing me and i did mot ... A: Katie, You did say no. You said no several times. He also manipulated his way into this and you ... | |
| I don't know exactly what to call it | 7/3/2007 |
| Q: this past year I was in a relationship for about 5 months with a guy who I am still friends with. ... A: Ellen, Are we certain that he did not penetrate? Even if he didn’t what he did is sexual assault. ... | |
| I think I was raped by my brother's best friend. | 6/21/2007 |
| Q: This all happened last night. I was sleeping over my siser-in-law's dad's house with my brother, my ... A: Analise, First, it is against the law and is considered Statutory rape. Meaning, you are underage ... | |
| confused, what am I doing?? | 6/16/2007 |
| Q: I'm gonna try to make this as short and quick as possible cause in reality it's a very long ... A: Rachel, You are not a bad person for “the things that you did”. I am hearing a few things here. I ... | |
| Rape | 6/12/2007 |
| Q: My best friend Victoria didnt tell me until just two days ago. She hates him now, becuase of what ... A: Becky, You are right. Rape is not something that you “just get over”. But at the same time this ... | |
| What to say? | 6/3/2007 |
| Q: I was raped a little over a year ago and don't really say much about it to anyone. But now I've been ... A: Andrea, I definitely think that you should talk to him. Tell him what happened and tell him that ... | |
| rape | 5/31/2007 |
| Q: I was raped 12 years ago. I still carry the emotional baggage. It has ruined my sex with my husband. ... A: Laura, When I took the classes to become a sexual assault advocate, I was scared to death to let my ... | |
| My wife was raped as a child age 12 | 5/31/2007 |
| Q: I am married to the most perfect woman I could have ever dreamed of spending my life with. We met ... A: Donald, She went through such a traumatic experience it makes sense that she’s “not over it”, you ... | |
| Rape & emotions | 5/30/2007 |
| Q: My husband and I have been together for 6 years and married for 3 of them. At the VERY beginning of ... A: Leah, Do you think that these feelings are because you’ve been validated? That all these years ... | |
| Helping a rape victim, my fiance | 5/29/2007 |
| Q: My fiance and I have been dating for almost seven months. She was raped when she was fourteen years ... A: Jonathan, First of all, I don’t think that you have an abnormal sexual need, especially being that ... | |
| Was it rape? | 5/29/2007 |
| Q: I visited my hometown a couple of weeks ago for a much needed vacation. The first night I was there ... A: Jordan, It’s really hard to know at this point if you were drugged or not. But, regardless, what ... | |
| Why am I so scared and what can I do to move beyond fear? | 5/24/2007 |
| Q: I've been diagnosed w/ PTSD. I'm having such an issue with uncovering past sexual abuse memories ... A: Oceana, This is not what you want to hear, but, this is a normal feeling, especially at the ... | |
| problem with my gf | 5/14/2007 |
| Q: I read your page and i understand what you've gone through and how this has affected your life. I ... A: Amit, Wow… You raise very good questions. I do not know much about your girlfriend or the ... | |
| Rape and ex boyfriend | 5/13/2007 |
| Q: My question is how do I get my ex boyfriend to understand the trauma I went through? We were ... A: Laura, Wow, after 5.5 years of a relationship and that little trust is sad. I am so sorry. This ... | |
| New Relationship | 5/11/2007 |
| Q: About 6 months before my 15th birthday i got involved in a relationship with a friend. We were ... A: Shay, check these out if you can. http://www.ibiblio.org/rcip//internl.html ... | |
| my girlfriend and rape | 5/10/2007 |
| Q: i have been with my girlfriend for over a year now and recently she told me that she has raped twice ... A: Matt, Boy…. It’s common and it’s so hard. I don’t want to tell you what to do. First I would ... | |
| I was raped at a young age | 5/10/2007 |
| Q: My name is Lisa. I was raped by my babysitter at the age of 3 until I was 5 or 6 years old. The ... A: Lisa, Oh honey, it sounds like you got stuck in the cycle of abuse. I am so sorry! PLEASE go to ... | |
| my wife was raped | 5/2/2007 |
| Q: she was raped when she was 14 and never told me much about it she never wanted to say anything. we ... A: Jason, I think that your wife is very unaware of what she feels at this point and she is running ... | |
| my wife was raped | 5/1/2007 |
| Q: she was raped when she was 14 and never told me much about it she never wanted to say anything. we ... A: Jason, I am sorry that you’re going through this. Your wife does need professional help, in the ... | |
| i need help,i'm lost | 4/29/2007 |
| Q: i was raped when i was 14.i had a bf but two of my guy friends rape me. i stay with the same bf for ... A: Samantha, I know how frustrating this is, it took me years to be able to be sexual. At least be ... | |
| help please | 4/27/2007 |
| Q: i am a 15 year old girl.and about 2 years ago i was raped by my Ex boy friend 3 times. i havent ... A: Bre, Why do you feel that “someone” needs to know? Having sex with your now boyfriend is your ... | |
| i'm trying so hard... | 4/12/2007 |
| Q: It's really hard to explain the situation but i'm going to try. I worked with this guy and we talked ... A: Tonya, It sounds like you are and may be still victim of date rape. He worked his way into your ... | |
| raped and confused | 4/1/2007 |
| Q: Im really confused about alot of things and i feel so alone. From ages 3 until i was 10 i was ... A: Tara, I am happy that he isn't bothering you anymore. People care Tara, but, there is only some ... | |
| confused on where to go for help | 3/31/2007 |
| Q: I am not sure where to begin but i am going to try and maybe you might be ble to help point me in ... A: Jessica, It is so important that you get some professional help. You have so much that you have to ... | |
| raped and confused | 3/31/2007 |
| Q: Im really confused about alot of things and i feel so alone. From ages 3 until i was 10 i was ... A: Tara, I think that at this point you need to talk to the authorities about this boyfriend that is ... | |
| Moving on | 3/30/2007 |
| Q: I'm not quite sure how this all works. I was raped by my stepfather when i was 12 years old and i ... A: Louise, I am sorry that you were not able to get justice. But, I am proud of you for trying that ... | |
| Having a hard time in life | 3/29/2007 |
| Q: I am sorry to bother you. I have been having a really hard time with life lately. I am 26 and a ... A: Stephanie, I think that our dreams can be a part of our subconscious mind. They may be telling us ... | |
| how to live my life | 3/29/2007 |
| Q: I don't even know were to begin. Years ago I was molested by my stepfather. I really don't remember ... A: Wanda, First, let me tell you that even if you find that you weren’t raped what you went through ... | |
| counseling | 3/20/2007 |
| Q: I've been seeing a counselor for 2 years. I started because I was in recovery for alcohol abuse. ... A: Jenny, Hello. Thank you for looking through the other answers. I am assuming then that you have ... | |
| unsure | 3/19/2007 |
| Q: this is quite a different question but I feel asking you may be of some help. I have never been ... A: Lisa, Is it possible that something has happened in your past that you can't remember? These ... | |
| when i was young | 1/30/2007 |
| Q: when i was young my mom left i was 9 my dad raped me all the time he made me sleep with him every ... A: Rickey, It's OK to be confused about your feelings. Growing up and being abused by your father ... | |
| Is it me? | 1/12/2007 |
| Q: I am just wondering if this is possible or am I a completely lost cause? I don't know where to ... A: J, None of this is your fault. This is not you. Unfortunately, a lot of victims of abuse, seem to ... | |
| Years after my attack I am still deeply effected | 1/6/2007 |
| Q: Kim, Thank you for your fast response to my question.You are right,I need to talk to someone.That ... A: Danielle, I'd be happy to help you find someone in your area. Let me offer you my personal e-mail. ... | |
| Years after my attack I am still deeply effected | 1/6/2007 |
| Q: I was searching on the Internet for an answer to my recent behavior.I know that it is linked with my ... A: Danielle, These feels are believe it or not SOMETIMES a part of the process with rape victims. ... | |
| HELP ME PLEASE!!!!! | 12/27/2006 |
| Q: i have no clue what my parents are in, but i know they are not happy with me. i have considered ... A: I can understand your fear of counseling. But, they will help you with those fears as well. I ... | |
| HELP ME PLEASE!!!!! | 12/26/2006 |
| Q: as far as my pastor helping me, i am talking to his wife now more, which is helpig, but my parents ... A: Is it possible that your parents are in denial? The cutting. This sounds like it's a problem and ... | |
| HELP ME PLEASE!!!!! | 12/24/2006 |
| Q: ok, i started getting raped by my cousin when i was 5 and it didnt end till January of last year. i ... A: Aundrea, First off, there's a lot going on here. Would you allow your pastor to help you get some ... | |
| My wife is a rape victim | 12/23/2006 |
| Q: My wife was raped when she was 18 years old, by two classmate from High School. She and he best ... A: Marc, I am sorry for what your wife has gone through. It has to be especially hard to have been ... | |
| help me please? | 12/6/2006 |
| Q: I dont know why, but I just need to talk to someone, someone I dont know, someone who wasnt there. ... A: Kristie, When you were at the hospital and going through the kit, did the hospital call someone ... | |
| doesn't he belive me | 12/4/2006 |
| Q: I was raped 6 years ago, by a stranger whilst on my way home from a night out. i hadn't been with my ... A: Cheryl, I am so sorry that he is responding this way to what you've been through. He may be ... | |
| Help | 11/30/2006 |
| Q: I live in Onalaska Tx and I really need some free counseling for myself. My story starts on yahoo ... A: I was not able to find you on yahoo. However, there are 74 centers in Texas. But, Because I am not ... | |
| A very close friend was raped as a child. Can you help me help her? | 11/29/2006 |
| Q: I met a beautiful girl when we were both in our teens, and though never intimate, we were ... A: It looks like what you are searching for more than anything is for someone to help her. I don't know ... | |
| the girl i am seeing was raped and i need to know how to help | 11/28/2006 |
| Q: ok well my names adam i am 18 her name is carmel also 18 we met at work whilst she was in an abusive ... A: Adam, First, I have to ask is she in counseling? She's drinking just as she says to drown out the ... | |
| 2 rapes, an annoying turn on, and a porn addict ex. | 11/21/2006 |
| Q: i was raped by my boyfried when i was 15. it took me years to deal with it, but through a boyfriend ... A: Leigh, I am sorry it has taken me so long. They changed how the questions come to us and they've ... | |
| moving on | 11/16/2006 |
| Q: WAS raped when i was 14, i'm now 26, can't seem to move on. i'm a nurse in a small town working in ... A: I don't think that you ever forget what happened, but I know that you learn to start living again. ... | |
| just starting to deal | 10/10/2006 |
| Q: I was raped by a coworker right before I turned 18. I had met him a few months before, and a staff ... A: Aurora, It is questions and stories like these that gave me the strength after my years of abuse ... | |
| Does my mother thinks the same? | 10/4/2006 |
| Q: I have an unusual sort of problem & I am quite sure that u will be helpful. I fantasize alot about ... A: Wahab, I don't know why your mom isn't waking up. But her responses are normal body responses. The ... | |
| I need some help and dont know where to turn | 9/27/2006 |
| Q: I was date raped 16/12/2005. This has had countless effects on my life and im feeling really low ... A: Rachel, I am happy that you are in counseling. I am afraid that your counselor may not be the right ... | |
| ?? | 9/18/2006 |
| Q: i went back several times this weekend and realissed it did not scare me being there and have now ... A: Katie, I am happy that you were able to go and I am thrilled that you wrote about it! Have you ... | |
| rape at 12 | 8/11/2006 |
| Q: I was raped when I was 12 years old in a swimming pool changing room by 6 boys and I knew one of ... A: Naomi, This is tough. Because as much as our family and friends want to help sometimes it becomes ... | |
| Help me help my girl | 8/10/2006 |
| Q: I have read through a lot of the letters here and the replies and i have picked up a lot of useful ... A: Mark, I'm happy that you've been able to find comfort and some answers here at the site. Support.. ... | |
| Rape | 8/6/2006 |
| Q: My girlfriend was raped, she told me the a while ago, I really want her to press charges, but i am ... A: Danny, First, we need to deal with her emotions. This can't be a forced thing. She really is ... | |
| my boyfriend | 7/30/2006 |
| Q: i would like to say first & formost that i commend u for helping people through a situation that was ... A: Mary, Thank you. How is he resenting you? I think he is pushing you away, because he feels he ... | |
| i have been sexually assaulted | 7/30/2006 |
| Q: I am 14 years old and when i was 3 i was sexually assaulted by my step grandfather. I dont remember ... A: Brittany, When you grow up in this setting, how else will you see sex? You're reaction was a ... | |
| Moving on...? | 7/30/2006 |
| Q: I havent had any counseling...to be honest I cant afford it. But I would like to, just a bit ... A: Because I don't know of your location. I think that RAINN is a great place to start! www.rainn.org ... | |
| my fiancee was raped | 7/28/2006 |
| Q: when she was a litle girl. she just told me last night, when she was living with her uncle, a ... A: Wally, The best thing and way to support her. Is ask her what she needs. If she says that you are ... | |
| Moving on...? | 7/27/2006 |
| Q: I was raped at 16 and i am now 21. A college senior and in love with this wonderful young man. He ... A: Jeanna, This isn't about your boyfriend. So, you don't need to apologize about being fair to him. ... | |
| trying to heal | 7/26/2006 |
| Q: I am 22, 7 years ago I was raped by a "friend" giving me a ride home from school. untill about 2 ... A: Heather, I'm happy that you are going to counseling. How did that go? You don't have to talk about ... | |
| I'm afraid to get couseling | 7/26/2006 |
| Q: I am 20 years old. I got married just out of high school to a guy I barely knew. After we had been ... A: Callie, It's completely normal to be afraid of therapy. Many survivors also dream of being raped ... | |
| I want to help my GF | 7/20/2006 |
| Q: It is now further down the line and things were going really well between my girlfriend and i, until ... A: Richard, As much as it hurts and scares you. Give her the space that she has requested. Call her ... | |
| Was it or wasn't it? | 7/20/2006 |
| Q: ..I am not sure if I'm in the right place or not. I'm not sure even if what happened to me would be ... A: Charlotte, I am so sorry that you are going through this. I have been molested, raped, and been ... | |
| How do I help my best friend? | 7/18/2006 |
| Q: Me and my best friend went on a two week long vacation and on the second last night she was raped ... A: Tasha, You can't blame yourself for what happened. You did and are doing all the right things now. ... | |
| sleeping around after rape | 7/15/2006 |
| Q: I was raped when i was 18 and am now 22. Even right after it happened i never really thought about ... A: Sarah, I am gonna answer these questions with some questions back to you. Why do you "sleep ... | |
| reporting rape | 7/12/2006 |
| Q: I was raped a week about 2 weeks ago now. I was drunk and I really don't know what happened. I was ... A: Samantha, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Did you go to the hospital? Did you have ... | |
| dealing after relationship | 7/3/2006 |
| Q: I need to get this out, I started dating my boyfriend 2 and a half months after I was raped in ... A: Lynn, First, i am very happy that you're in therapy. I am sorry that they are acting this way. ... | |
| Many years ago. | 7/2/2006 |
| Q: When I was very young, a close family friend who is probably the only honest person that I had ... A: Jenny, This is very common in people that were abused at a young age. The mind is very powerful. ... | |
| rape within an unbelieving family, part 2 | 7/2/2006 |
| Q: (part 2...) i may have known her for an extremely long time, but i don't like her parents, nor much ... A: Alex, Thank you so much for writing and sharing this story with me. I agree this story should be ... | |
| Can you help me, ? im a nervouse reck | 6/28/2006 |
| Q: Im in so much pain I was raped august 3,2005 and my life is falling apart im so confused and scared ... A: Luz, Depending on the states, you need to check into your rights. As for the healing from the ... | |
| Getting Help | 6/26/2006 |
| Q: I need your help. I was assaulted by a guy that I was dating nearly 3 years ago and the experience ... A: Heather, I wanted to say, I am so sorry that you've had to go through all of this. You will regain ... | |
| date rape | 6/25/2006 |
| Q: I'm unsure of whether or not I should disclose something that happened betweeen me and a coworker to ... A: This was a pressured sexual experience. You told him again and again that you didn't want to have ... | |
| Advice for a friend | 5/31/2006 |
| Q: A friend of mine just recently moved from a small midwestern city to Washington D.C. He graduated ... A: Doug, I am so sorry to hear about what happened to your friend. I myself will be moving to the D.C. ... | |
| what do you do? | 4/29/2006 |
| Q: I am a mom of four. Long story but I was raped by my best friends husband. I never saw it coming. ... A: Cari, First, stop saying that you can't live. Because you lived and you are living.:O) I know that ... | |
| My Ex GirlFriend was Raped | 4/26/2006 |
| Q: I just found out that my girlfriend of 2.5 years has been engaging in sexual activity with an older ... A: Mike, It's not uncommon for people that have been sexually abused to choose the path that your ... | |
| silence | 4/21/2006 |
| Q: I feel stronger when I don't talk about it, and like I have failed when I do talk. The people that ... A: Sara, You feel stronger because your mind is trying hard to repress these feelings. That's a fast ... | |
| My Girlfriend's past | 4/14/2006 |
| Q: I just wanted to say thank you so far for answering all the questions the others have posed on this ... A: Drace, It is my pleasure to help others! So, thank you. As for you, and your girlfriend. I ... | |
| raped by relative | 4/13/2006 |
| Q: I was raped 3 years ago by my sisters husband. we were both extrememly intoxicated. I tried to say ... A: Nicole, That's tough. Because I think that your sister should know, But, be prepared that it may ... | |
| ...was it daterape? was it even an attack? | 4/10/2006 |
| Q: i have a question for you. my friend Zoe [it's not her real name] has a question to ask, but she ... A: Liv, She needs to stay away from this "boy". She also should tell him, maybe with a friend why she ... | |
| Girlfriend was raped... | 4/6/2006 |
| Q: Where to start...I met a girl last October that lit up my life. I'm still with her now. We became ... A: Patrick, This sounds like domestic violence. The justice is always so off when it come to these ... | |
| confused | 3/26/2006 |
| Q: I have been sleeping with my ex-boyfriend occasionaly since we broke up over a year ago. A couple ... A: Ann, It sounds like date rape. Your reaction is very common. Can you see a rape trauma specialist? ... | |
| effects of abuse as child on adult pregnancy? | 3/17/2006 |
| Q: I'm currently over 5 months pregnant and in a secure relationship, looking forward to the birth of ... A: Bel, First, congrats on the soon arrival of your child! Best wishes. The body has a natural ... | |
| hi | 3/17/2006 |
| Q: i m doing a report on rape for my class. i wanted to ask 1.why is it that ppl wud rape children or ... A: 1. That's a good question. I am not in the mind of the abuser. but there are several ideas. Keep in ... | |
| I am struggling day by day | 3/16/2006 |
| Q: When I was 14 I was raped by the neighbor where I used to live. She, yes, she was 19 years old. ... A: Steph, Can you get some counseling? These sorts of feelings won't go away. Please reach out for ... | |
| Survival | 3/7/2006 |
| Q: I guess a preview would be effective first. I am 20 years old (21 in a month) and 4 years ago, my ... A: Kare, I think that recovery means a lot of different things. So, I don't think that it's fair to ... | |
| my friend raped | 3/6/2006 |
| Q: ------------------------- so even if he admitted to it she can still press charges against him? And ... A: Yes, she can still press charges, but, the process will be much harder, because i am assuming that ... | |
| i was anally and vaginally... | 3/2/2006 |
| Q: i was anally and vaginally raped (sodomized) and wanna know if there is any imaging that can prove ... A: Yom, The best evidence is right after the rape, the longer the time that passes the harder it is to ... | |
| Uncontrollable sexual behavior | 2/9/2006 |
| Q: I was molested and rpaed by a family from when i was 11-13. i was raped again (date rape) when i was ... A: Yes, this is very common behavior in rape and molestation survivors. But, this can be helped with ... | |
| Rape | 1/24/2006 |
| Q: my best friend's older sister was raped at work about a month ago. She's hard of hearing and doesn't ... A: Oh Boy, this is difficult. Is there a detective with the case? Maybe you can talk with him? NO does ... | |
| Rape | 1/24/2006 |
| Q: Is it still considered rape if it starts out being forced then later you keep going with it and you ... A: That's a tough question to answer, because if you didn't want it, and then later did.. Hmm... How ... | |
| people | 1/17/2006 |
| Q: I was talking to a guy in a romantic way for about 2 weeks. One day we had fooled around a bit. Not ... A: Kassie, This isn't about anyone, But, YOU! It shouldn't be about him, your boyfriend, your ... | |
| wife needs help moving on | 1/16/2006 |
| Q: I was reading over your Q&A's for some advice and I decided to ask you a couple questions. My wife ... A: 1. Therapy, on a consistant basis will help her with this. But, she needs to understand that this is ... | |
| Mom invites rapist to my wedding?!! | 1/7/2006 |
| Q: My mom has a close friend who she has known since childhood. When I was 15, her friend's older son ... A: First, congrats on taking back your life and for your upcoming marriage! It is very possible that ... | |
| Why was he right? | 12/27/2005 |
| Q: I was molested, raped, or whatever you call it by my sister's husband when I was 10 and again at ... A: Mel, I am so sorry. I can relate to this. I was abused by my sisters boyfriend, and after I told ... | |
| Hi Kim I am a student doing... | 9/16/2005 |
| Q: and i was hoping that you will be able to answer a few questions for me, 1. Why do women feel ... A: As a survivor I found these questions somewhat surprising. 1. why do we feel guilty? well, even ... | |
| I'm not sure what to do about this | 8/19/2005 |
| Q: Two days ago I was at one of my close friends houses and we went up to another of her friends houses ... A: Katie, I am really sorry that this happened to you. That your "friend" was participating in the ... | |
| Girlfriend's rape | 8/16/2005 |
| Q: I hope you can help with my problem. My girlfriend was staying with her sister and her sister's ... A: Danny, These are good questions. 1. People that are sexualy assaulted. Can feel so many things. It ... | |
| Raped and Telling | 8/10/2005 |
| Q: Kim- A little over a year ago I was raped by my best friend/ neighbor, and then asked for sexual ... A: Mase, I think that you are rightly upset. But, please don't let it stop you from reaching out. ... | |
| a few questions to ask.. | 7/3/2005 |
| Q: I'm a Malaysian student who is trying to do a research about rape.therefore, i would like to ask you ... A: Musfirah, 1. I don't think that the victim is ever at fault. That's like saying someone that is ... | |
| Am I wrong? | 6/18/2005 |
| Q: At the age of 10 I started a relationship with a guy who was much older than me (exactly how old I ... A: Wow. I was sad to read this. You were so young. I am happy that you are in counseling. They say ... | |
| abortion | 2/26/2005 |
| Q: I was raped a few months ago. I reported the police they were so averse and ill disposed. They said ... A: First and foremost, I'm truly sorry that you had such a bad experience with justice. We are ... | |
| how to make my bf more comfortable | 2/20/2005 |
| Q: I've written a question on here before and it was really helpful it was "how and when do I tell a ... A: Shay, Well, When I was assaulted my boyfriend knew because almost everyone did. I was in shock for ... | |
| Hi I'm taking an community... | 1/3/2005 |
| Q: A: I'm VERY sorry about my delay in response. I have been away from my computer completely unexpected. ... | |
| counseling | 10/21/2004 |
| Q: I was violently raped by a boyfriend. I never imagined he was capable of what he did. Since then he ... A: These are normal responses to rape. Unfornately the police have this state about them, that nothing ... | |
| Nightmares | 7/25/2004 |
| Q: I'm not really sure what I'm doing here, but I'll try not to mumble and get to the point. I'm not ... A: Amanda, Thank you. I am doing better. Happy that I had a day of rest. I wish that we could ... | |
| Nightmares | 7/20/2004 |
| Q: I'm not really sure what I'm doing here, but I'll try not to mumble and get to the point. I'm not ... A: Amanda, I am sorry for not writing sooner. I was sick this week. I wanted to tell you, that as ... | |
| My daughter was raped 2 days... | 3/14/2004 |
| Q: My daughter was raped 2 days ago by two 20 year old "friends" who wanted to be "paid back" for ... A: I am sorry to hear about your daughter. Is there a sexual assault center near you? Was she taken ... | |
| Recently, my boyfriend confided... | 2/16/2004 |
| Q: Recently, my boyfriend confided in me that when he was a little boy, his older brother performed ... A: Well I think that your boyfriend could be in denial of what happened. When that happens then they ... | |
| getting past it all | 8/30/2003 |
| Q: My name is Beth and I was raped 6 months ago by an ex-boyfriend. Shortly after it happened I found ... A: Beth, I am so sorry that I did not get this e-mail. More so I checked with the site and it was not ... | |
| csa and rape | 12/16/2002 |
| Q: Kim, I was raped at age 5 by a cousin, and also spent six years with a boyfriend who continually ... A: Leah, Hon, I wish that I could say that you will ever be able to accept this. Hon, I have not nor ... | |
| Rape problems 6 years later | 8/6/2001 |
| Q: I am a 20 year old female. When I was 14 and at the beach, my girlfriends and I met some olders guys ... A: Wow Krissy, You sure are a strong woman. My assault happened at 15 and I was much like you taken ... | |
| About court | 11/27/2000 |
| Q: I went to court on Friday, and it got put on hold until Jan.7 2001. I thought that this would be ... A: Joanne~ Hon I'm so sorry that this happened sometimes the hearing at court can take up to a year to ... | |
| years of guilt | 6/28/2000 |
| Q: I WAS RAPED WHEN I WAS 11.I AM NOW 32.THE PERSON WHO RAPED ME WAS KNOWN TO ME,HE WAS 17 AT THE ... A: Claire~ My first assault was at 15 I'm now 25. So the man who raped you was someone you trusted? ... | |
Kim
Top Expert on this page
Expertise
I am a survivor. I know what it’s like to be the victim. I am now a Sexual Assault Victim’s Care Advocate. I have been certified as such since November 2000. I am currently a student who is specializing in trauma and abuse and the associated disorders and illnesses.
Experience
I am a survivor. So, I not only have book smarts but, personal experience with what rape is and how much it affects the victim and his or her loved ones.
Education/Credentials
I am working on my Master's in Psychology specializing in trauma and abuse. I am in addition working on two associate degrees in Social Work and Women and Gender studies.
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