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How to Make the Right Move/Perhaps the girl of my dreams. But I just have no Clue hot to let her know.

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Hi, I'm Eli. Well my question is long and if you do answer it, it will be a great Christmas present. I have known this girl since i was in eleventh grade. We hit it off immediately and became really good friends for the next two years of high school. Throughout  the two years I guess i fell in love with her. I am only 21 years old and don't think I know what love actually is but this feeling I have only felt with her. When we were in school i never had a chance to ask he out because she had an off and on boyfriend. I wish i would have though, because i joined the military right after. So its been two years. I have had no contact with her at all until tonight. I'm home for the first time since i left. So i gave a call to my old buddy who happens to be living with her. I just went over there and I can't explain how I am feeling right now. My question is how do I tell her. I not event for sure that she is event into me. But just looking at her makes me feel like the last four years of my life would have been better and more fulfilling with her. Another hiccup is that i asked my buddy if they were together and he told me that they were but are now just friends. it didn't seem like he was implying anything but i just don't know. So should I tell her? What should I tell her? And how should i tell her? I really do think she could be the one but how do I know. Thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope you can help me out.

Answer
Hi, Eli.   

Thanks for sharing your story.   
Your situation is not uncommon. It's important that you don't make the common mistake of unloading her feeling on her all at once. Unless she equally in love with you, she is going to feel uncomfortable and cornered by that. Instead, take it forward in small steps. Talk to her on phone or meet in person over coffee to catch up about all the good times and memories you have and then see if there is chemistry. Then, ask her to meet again, if you stay around long enough and see if you can develop anything. There is no need to tell her now how you feel about her after you haven't see her in such a long time. This usually only works in movies.  

Thanks,

PH

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