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How to Make the Right Move/How to read between the lines


Hello how are you doing. Their this woman I work with she been working at my job for awhile now, I started to having a interested in her. One day I walk up to her and said to her hey how are you doing? I have two question to ask you, she said to me ok sure what do you want to talk about. I said to her I was wondering if you are seeing anybody and if you arent if I could take you out sometime. So told me she wasnt seeing anyone and She paused and froze and told me that she will think about it and will give me a answer at the end of the day. I said ok and walked away. So I waited until the end of the day and when I saw her at the end of the day she smile at me and said see ya, but didn't give me a respond to what I ask.  I was dis-pointed about what she did as she said she would give me a answer by the end of the day when she didn't. I talk to a friend about it and he was telling me maybe she just need more time to think about it and she didn't want to give you a respond yet. He also said she didn't say no to you so maybe you have a chance. So knowing me I don't want to give up easily, so I gave it two day before I would talk to her again about it. I came to her again and asked if she thought about what I asked her, she tell me that she just been in a bad divorce and she not looking to date anyone right now, so I was taking it at the moment that she wasn't interesting and before I could tell her that I understand, she said to me maybe in a few month she dating again and  that I can talk to me in the break room and we can be start out as friends. So as time pass I would try to talk to her when I could in the break room she would talk to me but I couldn't tell if she was really interested or not in me. I notice a few times she would notice me as I walked by her, sometime she would get this smile on her face, but some time when I would try to talk to her she would act uneasy when I was in the break room, so it was weird I couldn't pin point if she was interested in me or she thought I was a joke or something. Maybe she like the attention, anyway weeks later I figure maybe I could ask her out as a friend and see if anything could start from there. So I walk up to her one day and said to her hey I have a question to ask you, now what I am asking is not a date like last time but I was wondering if you would want to just hang out as friends. I re force what I was saying and told her it would just be friends and not a date. She said to me look I don't want to date anyone from work as it could lead to problem and gossip in the work place as the same with friendship outside the workplace as too as it can lead to trouble and gossip. She also said its nothing personal but I being friend outside the work place as it could confuse things between us and I don't want to do that. But than she said to me I don't mind you siting in the break room talking to me (which kind of confuse me more as at my job gossip can start in the break room, and I know she know this by me just sitting their trying to get to know her, if she doesn't want gossip to happen wouldn't she not want me talking to her in the break room?) So finally I thought to myself ok I know now she doesn't want anything to do with me, before I could so ok I understand, as I was about to tell her its ok she pull out the I will think about it again. I said ok and walk away didn't say anything. I give her time again and repeat what I did last time because I wanted a clear answer this time, no games. So i walk up to her again and just was friendly asking her how she was doing and everything. I asked her again if she thought about what I said and she huff and look like she was about to get upset but before she could say anything I look at her in the eyes and said to her look if the answer is no it is ok. She paused and than said to me look didn't tell me say no but said I want to keep it the way I said before and she than thank me for asking her out as friends. I said aight and walk away. She been away from my job for about two month now and I haven't see her until this wed. I was trying to leave work and I passed by her in the hallway. I honestly wasn't trying to talk to her after everything that happen but when she saw me she got that big smile on her face again. I just keep walking didn't say anything to her. I have had friends who are women tell me they think she been testing me, I honestly don't believe she is interested in me by what she said. My question is if she wasn't really interested why didn't she just tell me she not why did she keep telling me I'll will think about it when in turn she didn't want to go out with me? I know it hard to answer as their more detail to the story and you need to be their to see it, but I just want to get answer so I can understand better when it come to women. I had a friend who told me you have to read between the lines with women, but I honestly don't think she inrested in me. Thank you for you time.

Hello, to answer your question - the reason it's hard for a woman to say right away that she is not interested is because rejecting people is not easy. It's also possible that she wasn't sure whether she was interested and she needed some time to figure it out. Yes, reading between the lines is important. "I will think about it" generally means no, because the girl who has any interest wouldn't want  to send this kind of message.   

How to Make the Right Move

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