Expert: Natasha Kozyreva - 5/21/2009

Question
Hello Natasha
I have a Russian friend whose favorite quote is :
В жизни нужно любить не себя, а....меня
Unfortunately when I try to translate it online, the result does not make much sense to me
Please can you help

Nick

Answer
Hello Nick,

At first this phrase seemed a bit strange to me, but now I guess it may be a pun on the famous theatre director Stanislavsky's quotation: "Love art in yourself, and not yourself in art". This means that an artist shouldn't be narcissistic and use his craft as a means of egotistical self-expression, but genuinely love art for its own sake.

"В жизни нужно любить не себя, а....меня" can be translated as "In your life, love not yourself, but... me" (Unfortunately it sounds worse in English). The point is that the listener expects the phrase to end with "not yourself, but others" in a call for altruism, but the ending completely defies those expectations as it is actually a pretty selfish thing to say (and tongue-in-cheek of course).   

Hope it's not too long and boring and will help you understand your friend better :)

Best regards,
Natasha