Seventh-Day Adventists/HELP ME


QUESTION: "i have known this guy for sometime now, he is the best friend i have ever had, i feel comfortable when am around him, i just realized not long ago that i am in love, he is everything i want in a future partner, we share so many things together, I MEAN HE UNDERSTANDS ME MORE THAN I UNDERSTAND MY father is a baptist pastor and will definitely not agree to the fact that i will have to move to another faith like the Adventist...i am so confused...i dun wanna lose my best friend and my soul mate, please help me"

ANSWER: Hello Rebecca,

I know a lot of people who have married outside of their faith.  I even have a female friend who introduced me to the Seventh-day Adventist faith who after bringing me into a local fellowship (many years down the road mind you) met a Baptist guy and decided to marry him.  I will tell you what I told her...  It is not wise if you believe in Baptist doctrines and Bible interpretations to intermarry with someone of a different faith.  But love tends to strange infatuations at times.  You should sit and hammer these issues out with your friend and father.  Even marriage itself is something you should really reconsider at such a time as this.  

I realize that relationships can get heavy in a hurry and attractions can be very strong.  Have you considered rather the urgency of the kingdom of God and his righteousness before deciding to take a drastic step and marrying right away?  What about the spreading of the gospel?  Who will do it if all the regular channels are bogged down with eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage?  It's time to approach eternal life with an unquenchable spirit of yearning and devotion.  In heaven marriage will not be an issue.  Love will be fulfilled in elements higher than an earthly, marital consideration.  Love will be all that should always have been.  

Aside from that, The Bible says we should not be unequally yoked together.  Would you not consider your marriage an unequal yoking together?  Let's take our faith seriously and put holy things separate and above earthly, sensual, temporal matters.  Save yourself a ton of misery and heartache and live the future in the wisdom of a sound conscience prior to stepping into a pandora's box of all sorts of problems.  Trust in the mistakes others have made and grown from.  Don't deny the wisdom of the patriarchs.

I hope there was something in my monologue that could help you think differently about your relationship.  Time only makes good things better and separates potential negativity from the possibilities of future stumbling.

If the love is true it will grow.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: i guess its over now, i did not want to be the problem why he had to leave his church or he be the reason why i had to leave my church...i loved him dearly and did not want to leave baptist and be an Adventist cos of marriage. now, he has found himself an Adventist girl who shares in the same faith. i however am grateful for your advice and wish them both well in life.

ANSWER: Ohh...  I am truly sorry for the separation you are experiencing.  It is never an easy thing to depart from a person of romantic potential (of course of the opposite sex).  I pray your heart is not too broken about things.  I am grateful that you have a conciliatory attitude about your situation, based at least upon your statement you: "wish them both well in life."  I pray there is a kernel of hope in the parting of ways.  Did you lay the terms out to him and set things straight or did the subject come up in the passing of time?


Since you are in a position of reflection and contemplation of your future it would be disingenuous for me not to ask...  Did you have a chance at all to study what the Seventh-day Adventist believes?  

Also, I was curious to ask why you decided to come and ask me for advice considering you are from a Baptist background.  Not that I am not honored and flattered.  I appreciate your confidence in me.  

Kind Regards,


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: it has not been easy for me...i spoke to ma dad, who did not object to it after considering my feeling. i spoke to other baptist deacons and ministers who all seem to say no, like it cant be possible. i was hurt just letting him go like that cos of faith. this guy is so understanding that he said going to church is not what will get us to heaven but we do with our lives, i believed him but on a second thought, i was scared of a possible disappointment in future.i was scared that i would not bhe able scared that i had to let him go...i love adventist, i love their teaching, the teach so you can understand, and i love their hymms...this hymm which always reminds me of the second coming of christ, COMING AGAIN, JESUS IS COMING AGAIN....i love the church but not enough for me to just wake up one day and say i want to be an adventist....thats why...

Love...  It's more than feelings and strong emotions...  "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten son...

You said above that you "love" the church.  Sister, you have to understand what that word means.  Part of the work the holy spirit does in a person is to cause them to "love" the truth.  But what a person does with the truth is different for every one of us who considers himself "in the faith".  "The Church" is not a denomination if you are asking me.  Baptist, Seventh-day Adventist, Lutheran, Presbyterian, all have their separate teachings that have caused their separation from other brethren at times.  There is a place for division as Christ has said:  "I did not come to bring peace, but a sword...",  "A man's enemies will be those of his own household".  But "The Church" that you say you love, means something more transcendent of just a physical structure or a denominated group.  The word "Church" in English comes from "Ekklesia", a Greek term made up of two subterms:  Ek =out of, and klesia= called out.  So if "The Church" really means "(ones) called out of", then you have to ask yourself what these "ones" are called out of.  

Now I don't want to just flood your mind with information because as you have said:
"I love the church but not enough for me to just wake up one day and say I want to be an adventist".  But while I admire your honesty, I find something in what you said to be problematic for you.  If the truth would set you free, then you must find the truth.  "Seek and ye shall find".  If you know Adventist truth and it is what you say it is, that is, this truth, then seeking more from that source is the only thing that can keep you free.  I am not saying herein that you will find every shred of truth in the SDA Church denominational structure.  What I am saying is that there is a church within this church that not many will recognize or admit to.  And if you fail to connect with the faulty surface church, you will likely never meet any of these who are a select few who know the whole truth of certain critical matters, and are seeking to know there deeper issues of the entire Jewish system.  

There is much to learn and much to unlearn, but you have to be willing to wade through lots of muck to get to it.  If you aren't willing to don your spiritual armor and waders, you will not enter into life.  Please, do not hesitate to get your mind wrapped around "come out of her my people, and be not partakers of HER sins and receive not of HER plagues."  This is what you are coming out of and into when you agree to fellowship in the EKKLESIA.

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Dennis Wicklund


Anything I have acquired knowledge about through my education, and personal life experiences.


I became a member of the Seventh-day Adventist Church in 1997. Since then, I have graduated from Walla Walla University, A Seventh-day Adventist undergraduate institution, with a theology degree and progressed in my understanding of SDA History, and doctrinal belief. I am currently not attending services of the mainline SDA Church because I oppose their acceptance and enforcement of the Trinity.



As listed above, Bachelor of Arts, Theology major, 2005

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