Expert: Hilary - 3/30/2009

Question
When I was in college, I masturbated a lot. I wanted to be a virgin when I got married, but quite frankly couldn't have done it without getting off solo. I lived in a dorm with paper-thin walls (no roommate though) and got used to having orgasms while being totally silent-the bedsprings barely even squeaked. However, now that I'm married I'm getting signals that my husband would like it if i were more..."vocal" in the bedroom, but I'm not. Don't get me wrong, the sex is great, but I'd like to be able to show it when I climax. How can I loosen up and start letting go?

Answer
Try new things!

Tell your hubby you want to make him happier by being more vocal, and explain the situation if you haven't.

Or you could try without talking to him, but in MY relationship, I discuss every detail of sex with my man.

You could start by just talking during sex, telling him what you like, simple thinks like, "mmm, yeah" "Yes" or whispering his name.
Quietly, though!

Or you could just breathe a little harder each time.

When he's not home, try masturbating and being vocal.

My only advise--DON'T FAKE IT!

Don't try too hard, and relax.

You're other option is 'getting kinky' if you think you're into it (or him) tell him to spank you, and be vocal from that.

It could start you up! Who knows!

Same with anal sex. If you've never done it before, it might hurt a little. Moan from the pain. Guys have always gotten off on that in my experience.

Good luck!

-Hilary