Expert: Hilary - 9/21/2009

Question
Dear Hilary:
In a week, I'm about to meet a man who loves me and wants nothing more than to give me good oral sex. I experienced oral before--about 10 years ago--and at the time it didn't do much. Perhaps the reason was that it was at a boyfriend's home and I was petrified his parents and grandparents could hear us. One other current concern is that it will be my first time having sex with my boyfriend and I am worried a bit about the way I look (lost weight, but not as much as I would have liked to by the time I see him). I worry that I will get shy and won't talk to him during sex about how much I'm enjoying it.

Anyway, I really want to enjoy the oral my man wants to give me. I adore him, and he does me.

So my question is twofold:

1. How do I enjoy oral sex without being self-conscious?

2. How do I let go entirely?

So far, the only way I've reached orgasm is by manual stimulation.

Please help.

Thank you.

Agnes

Answer
When women are self-conscious, it gets on my nerves. I bet you your boyfriend would love nothing more than to have you naked. There's no reason to be self conscious. Men LOVE naked women. Even if they aren't supermodels. Actually MANY men PREFER a real woman. With some chunk and junk. Honest. My fiance` fed me nothing but fats and candies for a week because he wanted me to gain 5 pounds. And no, he doesn't have a fat fettish. I still can wear a size xs if I want to. His preference is normal.

And on how to let go? That's hard for me to explain. Other than, "Just... let go!". Take a deep breath before hand, close your eyes if you need to. Every woman is different so I'm not sure what would bring you zen.