You are here:

Sex Advice/Oral Sex/Taking Sex Seriously/Jealousy


If I take sex very seriously on an emotional and perhaps spiritual level once I have sex with the person I am seeing, then I feel I have to take it seriously with all his past relationships (I have none), which bothers me. It feels like they all own a part of him in some way (they were all girls he was dating and he's the type to take things seriously). I want to be able to take sex seriously but balancing out the equation is difficult. I don't know how to deal with it. I know this is a complicated thing to ask but how do I deal with this?

You sound like you're not ready for sex yet.  Unless you find another virgin, any partner you have will already have had other partners before.  Most males don't keep in touch with their past partners, so the most likely scenario is that these past partners you're worried about won't currently be part of his life.  They don't really own him.  

A line from the 1990s song "I'm Free" comes to mind:  "Things are only as important as I want them to be."

Sex Advice/Oral Sex

All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts


Doug Adams, Ph.D.


I am happy to answer all kinds of questions about sexuality.


I have been answering questions about sexuality from both males and females for over 13 years on my web site I have been an expert on for over four years and am currently an expert in eight sexuality categories. I am the top expert in seven of the eight categories.

I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading research universities in the world.

Past/Present Clients
I have helped countless thousands of people online over the past 10 years.

©2017 All rights reserved.