Sex Toys/Vibrator


Question
I am 44 yrs. old with hypoganism with approx. a 4" penis. My wife is 37, we have two children 5/2. It seems in the past several years my wife seems to be having more and more of a problem reaching orgasm. She can only reach orgasm by using a Hitachi magic wand and usually only on high. Since we've been married (9 Yrs.) she's only orgasm d once without some form of direct stimulation, which I know is not unusual. She used to be able to use her hands, but that doesn't seem to work as well either. I recently bought her on oroscillator  vibrator due to good reviews I had read, but it doesn't have enough power. I've tried to give her oral and she says it feels OK but no where strong enough to orgasm. I recently tried again and spent quite a bit of time trying to find her clitoris to stimulate it but I couldn't really find it or expose it.
    I recently purchased a penis extension hoping it would feel better for her but she said it felt like it was going sideways inside of her.
   I've done some reading about clitoral unhooding and was wondering if she's possibly a candidate. Also is there a vibrator that is at least as powerful as the Hitachi, but quieter?

Answer
Hello Fred,

Thank you for your question.

The Hitachi Magic Wand is the strongest vibrator on the market.  For some women who have a hard time reaching orgasm, it may be the only thing that will do the trick. 70% of woman can only orgasm via clitoral stimulation anyway, so penetration does not have anything to do with a woman's orgasm for the most part.

So, if the Hitachi works for her, that may be her only option.  There may be many reasons why she can't orgasm, which could be mental, physical, and/or emotion issues. However, if the Hitachi works, she should probably stay with that.

You could try another penis extension, but like I said, since women don't usually orgasm that way, it may be pointless.  Maybe the one you purchased was not a very good one, and quality with those types of toys varies quite a bit.

I think her using her vibrator and you helping her with other means of foreplay/stimulation is maybe the best way to share together and be intimate. Let her have her orgasm first and then you could have intercourse so you can orgasm as well.

She may be able to get clitoral unhooding done.  However, I would be VERY cautious about surgery, as it could backfire and leave her feeling nothing from scarring. I think if she is getting off with the Hitachi, then that is good. At least she is getting off with that.

And, don't think of penetration as they only way to have sex.  There are lots of other things you can do, including lots of foreplay.  If she is not very receptive to oral sex, there may be reasons for this.  If you have a hard time finding her clitoris, then it is likely buried deeper, or her head is heavy and it doesn't come out.  But you can actually give a woman a clit "hand job" by moving the skin up and down over the clitoris and that should cause stimulation.  However, vibrators really work best when it comes to the clitoris for many women.

I hope this answer helped.  If you have any other questions, let me know.

Thanks you,
Domina

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Domina

Expertise

I am your Personal Pleasure Guide and I can answer questions about any sex toy on the market, including toys for women, men, transgender, bi, gay, lesbian or other. My specialties include women's sexuality, sexual pleasure and sex toys for women, including the G-spot, body safe lubricants, sex toy materials, including those to avoid. I also know a lot about men's sex toys include dolls, c-rings, prostate stimulators, anal toys, and masturbators. I have extensive knowledge about bondage and kink toys including proper and safe usage, as well as sex toys for couples and romance products to help spice up and enhance your relationship. In addition to sex toys, I am very knowledgeable about sexuality, the sexual response cycle, and sexual anatomy, so can advise you on the best toys for specific body parts and how to use them for maximum benefit. I have tested numerous sensation and stimulating creams as well, so can advise on these type of products, if they work, how to use them, and what products to avoid. If you are wondering about a product comparison, I can give you my honest opinion on many varieties of a similar toy type, including pros and cons of each. In addition to sex toy questions, I do have a lot of knowledge about human sexuality and relationships as well and have answered questions about open relationships, erectile dysfunction, and other issues. If I don't have the answer myself, I will find it for you, as well as other resources to check out. My G+ Profile is here- https://plus.google.com/u/0/116207828728706505588?rel=author

Experience

As as pleasure consultant, I have worked for 6 years in various sex toy shops, including brick and mortar shops where I advised customers on what types of toys they may like to purchase, as well as educating them on the toys and sexuality in general. For the past 5 years I have honestly reviewed over 1000 sex toy products, including creating a guide to body safe lubes (paraben and glycerin free), written articles on sex toy materials and some known toxins, sex toy safety, glass toys and their safety, Eco-friendly sex toys, sex toys for women, men and couples to share. I have an established sex toy review blog with over 5000 articles, reviews and sexual information posts, and have gained a reputation as a sex toy expert.

Organizations
Society for Human Sexuality, San Francisco Club Cal Exotics Xbiz Real Sex Toy Reviews

Publications
PopMyCherryReview.com, Sex Life Canada, BlogHer.com, the Sex Carnival, Whiplash!, SMUT, Divine Caroline, Carnal nation, Good Vibes magazine, Lover Magazine, Broken Pencil, AltSexTalk, Ezine Articles, Real Sex Toy Reviews, Boinkology, Examiner, Vibrator.com, and many more.

Education/Credentials
6 years working in the sex toy industry 5 years reviewing sex toys and writing articles on sexuality BFA and a BA Numerous workshops on sexuality and sex toys in general.

Awards and Honors
Governor General's Award for the highest GPA

Past/Present Clients
My main emphasis is writing sex educational review of sexuality products for the adult public via my blog and various other publications. I have also written articles and product descriptions for various sex toys shops including Sextoy.com, TabuToys, Pink Cherry, Babeland, Good Vibes, Vibrator.com, MyTickleSpot, as well as numerous specialty shops and manufacturers of quality sex toy products. Manufacturers include Lelo, We-Vibe, Cal Exotics, Pipedreams, Sportsheets, Ruby Glass, Happy Valley, Fun Factory, Vibratex, Liberator, Adam & Eve, Dr Laura Berman Intimate Basics, Big Teaze Toys, Tantus and more.

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