AboutTricia Expertise I was a single parent to my child his entire life. I have experienced many ups and downs that comes everyday with being a single parent. I have learned a lot throughout these years about child support/courts, ways to cope with the
daily stress, day care issues, work, ADD, relationships, teenagers, when to compromise and when to not, money issues, discipline issues, etc. I have done an excellent job raising my son who is now on his own and functioning well. I am currently an Executive of my company without any type of degree. My perseverance and strength has gotten me this far in life and work. I learned to understand what I need to focus on in life and what I can`t waste time on, learning to compromise most situations.
Question My son is 4 years, and has never known his father. He left me when I told him I was pregnant and he went to great measures so that I never contacted him. However, he contacted me about a year ago as he wanted to start seeing my son. We tried counselling which didn't work as he didn't want me to be present during access and he didn't want to work with me at all, he really hates me. The next step is court and I haven't heard anything in about 6 months so I assume he's given up. I want my son to know his father, I just want him to respect me. I'm having a lot of behavioural problems with my son lately. Alot to do with our busy lifestyle as I've started studying and working in the last 6 months, but alot I believe because he needs a male influence in his life. I feel like I can't do this all myself. Should I contact his father to tell him how much his son needs him? Or do I leave it alone and let him come around when he is ready?
Answer Hi Alicia!
Being that he had nothing to do with your son for years, I would doubt that he would be sensitive to your son's needs. Calling the father would probably upset you more and accomplish nothing more than that. Your son really does not know his father or have had him in his life long enough to really "distort" his life and cause behavior issues.
I would think your son just has had allot of changes in life recently and children when they are young get overwhelmed with to many changes. You need to try to focus on a keeping your son's routine normal.