Single Parenting/single parent


Hi there, I have a 2 year old boy.  His biological father has never been in the picture, I did notify him but he did not want to be involved, and I choose not to make him pay child support, just a clean break, and my question is, at what age do I explain to my son about his biological dad.  He will eventually ask me, mommy why don't I have a daddy?  And it's like I want to be honest, I don't want to ever bad mouth him but at the same time I don't want to give him false hope.  What do I do?

Hi, katie, thanks for your question. You asked, "t what age do I explain to my son about his biological dad"?

The answer is - at every age. But, the more important question is "what do you tell him?" The answer to that is that what (and how) you tell him should be appropriate to his age.

Even more importantly, is to keep the door open. If you make a 'clean break', on your side, as you say, then your son will eventually resent you. He will wonder why you closed the door, when there might have been a chance, later on, that his dad might have changed his mind.  

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Bruce Borkosky, Psy.D.


Questions such as 'what are some options for dealing with this problem' are easiest to answer. It's difficult, if not impossible, to diagnose anyone over the internet.


I'm a licensed psychologist, since 1994. I have raised several step-children.

American Psychological Association Florida Psychological Association National Register of Health Service Providers in Psychology


Psy.D., Miami Institute of Psychology, 1993

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