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Social Etiquette and Good Manners/Questions

SubjectDate AskedExpert
Birth Announcement2/17/2017Sharon Schweitzer JD
  Q: What's the correct way to mention deceased grandparent's names and where they resided (city/state) ...
  A: Sarah, First, congratulations on your newborn son. This is a beautiful time to be cherished and ...
death1/22/2017Nancy Mitchell
  Q: my dads brother in law passed away (his sister died 4 years ago) . My dads brother in law was like ...
  A: What a lovely gesture to send flowers at this sad time. I would send the flowers to your father and ...
Covering scars1/12/2017Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I am going to attend training with my coach and other athletes. I know the coach very well not the ...
  A: Never be self conscious about your scars. They are part of who you are. Go ahead and wear your ...
Denying Invitation1/11/2017Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: If a supervisor ask one of his subordinates to dinner at his home, but the subordinate does not want ...
  A: While a person has the right to deny an invitation, in this case I believe it would be politically ...
physical confidence1/5/2017Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I want to increase my physical confidence I have will for humanity,to do anything big I have mental ...
  A: Self confidence when meeting new people takes practice and knowing that you have something to give ...
dvd12/20/2016Nancy Mitchell
  Q: I would like to know if Ms. Nancy has all her videos on DVD for purchase. I teach etiquette to my ...
  A: The videos were produced and are the property of the website Monkeysee.com, parent company ...
joining club10/24/2016Nancy Mitchell
  Q: I have a friend who I have coffee and lunches with regularly and he belongs to the premier social ...
  A: I see no problem or awkwardness in asking your friend to sponsor you for membership in the club. ...
awkward letter9/20/2016Teri Davis Newman
  Q: I would like to send a condolence letter (Not a sympathy card!) to an acquaintance whose father ...
  A: I would word it in such a way that you convey that you are sorry for her loss but not to imply that ...
This is awkward!9/20/2016Nancy Mitchell
  Q: acquaintance whose father died a month ago. She and I are not close - that's why I didn't hear of ...
  A: Because you don't know the specifics of your friend's relationship with her father in his final ...
Letter of condolence9/20/2016Sharon Schweitzer JD
  Q: acquaintance whose father died a month ago. She and I are not close - that's why I didn't hear of ...
  A: JoAnne, Comforting others is a delicate balance. You are a thoughtful person to be concerned about ...
An awkward letter9/20/2016Constance Hoffman
  Q: acquaintance whose father died a month ago. She and I are not close - that's why I didn't hear of ...
  A: Jo: Focus on your friend, not on the person who passed. Keep your message simple and supportive ...
How to write a condolence letter in an awkward situation9/20/2016Jay Remer
  Q: I would like to send a condolence letter (not a sympathy card!) to an acquaintance whose father died ...
  A: I understand your hesitation. Make no reference to the relationship between the deceased and your ...
Vests8/18/2016Constance Hoffman
  Q: Hoffman, Do you have any thoughts on men wearing vests? I enjoy wearing them, but would like to get ...
  A: The shoulders of the vest should always lie flat against your body and below any collar points. If ...
women7/20/2016Teri Davis Newman
  Q: Is it bad manners to go up to a woman I don't know and say "I want to fuck you".
  A: If you really have to ask this question, then you are beyond what I or anyone can do for you. You ...
birthday party etiquette7/18/2016Jay Remer
  Q: an aunt of ours is having a surprise bbq for her husbands (our uncle) 65th birthday party on the ...
  A: I would resist going down that road personally. I do not know your family's dynamics, however. ...
Serving etiquette6/5/2016Constance Hoffman
  Q: I hope you could kindly enlighten me on serving etiquette. I have helpers at home (maids) and they ...
  A: Your helpers should not be placing the serving trays on the table while guests are present. Should ...
Non-Communicating Neighbor5/14/2016Teri Davis Newman
  Q: Recently, my neighbor approached me and said that she found a kitten in her yard, and was unable to ...
  A: Just go ask her if the kitten still needs a home and if so, you are prepared to do that now, but not ...
Referring to shopper as "Mama"5/9/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: At the supermarket my mom regularly shops at, the employees constantly refer to her (usually in the ...
  A: When someone calls a woman over the age of 40 "Mama", it is a term of endearment, not an insult and ...
Grave Monument Name4/20/2016Teri Davis Newman
  Q: I had a brother is that died at 14 y/o, and we were raised by our mother and step father. When my ...
  A: If your stepfather doesn't visit the grave (and it's highly unlikely that he does after 44 years) ...
sensitivity with friends4/12/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I have an old friend in another city who I see twice a year when he comes here on business. We ...
  A: My suggestion is that when you are on the phone making your plans with your friend to meet that you ...
Formal dinner seating for two3/31/2016Nancy Mitchell
  Q: What would be the correct way to seat two people - an older, married couple - in a large, private ...
  A: This seems an odd circumstance to me, that two people would be seated alone at such a large dining ...
head stone2/29/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: My father-in-law just recently remarried, not quite 2 years after the death of his first wife (my ...
  A: What an interesting coincidence about your Father-in-law's first and second wives' names being the ...
Proper way to respond2/14/2016Jay Remer
  Q: Remer: I have been taking my pets to a very good veterinarian for several years. She is retiring ...
  A: You have every right to use whichever vet you want. I am a dog fancier and have been most of my ...
wedding party1/24/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I am the mother of the groom and I would like to have my niece in the wedding party as a flower ...
  A: I am sorry that the process of planning your son's wedding is difficult. However, even if you are ...
Beta Male Handshake1/23/2016Jay Remer
  Q: Regarding handshakes, I've looked into dominant and submissive body language and it seems the best ...
  A: Both 'alpha' and 'beta' handshakes are to be avoided. A proper handshake between any two people ...
Gravy boats1/16/2016Teri Davis Newman
  Q: Newman: I am shopping for a sterling gravy boat. What are the best dimensions for the boat for ...
  A: For small home dinner parties you should have a 12-16 oz gravy boat as it can be refilled and they ...
Gravy boats1/16/2016Jay Remer
  Q: Remer: I am shopping for a sterling gravy boat. What are the best dimensions for the boat for ...
  A: First of all, do not worry about dimensions. Gravy boats can vary in size and they all pretty much ...
Gravy boats1/16/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: Lett, I am shopping for a sterling gravy boat. What are the best dimensions for the boat for ...
  A: I don't often receive questions about the accoutrements of fine dining so your question was most ...
Business dinner1/12/2016Constance Hoffman
  Q: Hoffman, Best wishes for a happy and healthy new year ma'am. I may be attending a dinner next week ...
  A: Todd: If you are wishing to obtain a position in law, by all means attend as many functions/dinners ...
ex husband's Obit1/11/2016Sharon Schweitzer JD
  Q: I was married to the deceased for 37+ yrs...we have five adult children,and many grandkids. Neither ...
  A: Grace and kindess to all concerned under the circumtances eases the stress in times of loss. ...
Graduation Gift1/10/2016Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: Is it inappropriate to send a box of candy along with a graduation card to a college graduate? I ...
  A: Graduation gifts typically are items that are useful to the graduate in the future. Some ...
Standing in Doorways1/6/2016Constance Hoffman
  Q: As a business owner I am often frustrated by individuals who choose to stand and block entry ...
  A: I suggest a few ideas. Say "excuse me, but I need to get thru......" , or as a leader, when you ...
stop neighbors from visiting12/28/2015Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: It started nice, with my senior neighbors (we're in our early 30's) coming every now and then, ...
  A: You are running scared of your neighbors when you should just be up front with them. The next time ...
Tombstone inscription12/27/2015Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: What is the proper was to inscribe a headstone? I am divoriced, and was divorced at the time of my ...
  A: There are several issues about your situation that would like to address. Children aged 13 and 9 ...
Obtaining Addresses12/18/2015Teri Davis Newman
  Q: I am thinking about sending a graduation card to a college student who will graduate soon. We ...
  A: As they say, it's the thought that counts. People who put their address online do this in order to ...
Sending Graduation Card12/15/2015Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I am thinking about sending a graduation card to a student employee that once worked with me along ...
  A: Sending a congratulations for graduation card is never a bad idea, but it depends what it says and ...
Saying Goodbye12/6/2015Teri Davis Newman
  Q: Newman: There is a young female employee who will be resigning soon from her job where we both ...
  A: If she told you personally that she is leaving then you should definitely wish her well a day or two ...
Hand Shake or Hug12/4/2015Constance Hoffman
  Q: There is a young female, 22 years old, who will be resigning from her job. We currently work ...
  A: Unless there is a long term, close friendship between the parties it would be best to offer a hand ...
Appreciation Letter12/1/2015Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I work with a student employee at a state university. She has been a very good employee kind, ...
  A: The best approach to your wanting to compliment this student for the job well done is to write a ...
suicide of current boyfriend11/17/2015Nancy Mitchell
  Q: My daughter current boyfriend of less than a year took his life and my daughter found him. His ...
  A: May I begin with condolences to your daughter, her boyfriend's family and your family. Such a ...

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Social Etiquette and Good Manners

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Cynthia W. Lett

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Expertise

Proper manners with friends,family,colleagues,neighbors and everyone else you know.

Experience

I have been an etiquette expert teaching and consulting on the subject worldwide since 1983. I started and serve as the Executive Director of the International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals and am considered a leader in the field of etiquette and protocol training and execution. I edited "Etiquette for Dummies" and have recently written "Lett's Talk - Everyday Etiquette Dilemmas and What to Do about Them". My book, "That's So Annoying:An Etiquette Expert on the World's Most Irritating Habits And What To Do About Them" was published in 2009 and is available wherever books are sold. I taught the Business Protocol class to Master's level students at the George Washington University, Washington, DC for seven years I served as Chief of Protocol for MCI Telecommunications for three years.

Organizations
International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals, ASTD, PCMA, National Speakers Association

Publications
I have been quoted over 700 times in the past 5 years worldwide. Publications include Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, Washington Times, NY Times, Washington Business Journal, USA Today, Associated Press, London Times, Newsweek Japan edition, Newsweek US edition and many many more.

Education/Credentials
I am a Certified Etiquette Professional (CEP) and Certified Protocol Professional (CPP) earned by examination through ISPEP. I have a Master's degree in hospitality law and undergrad degrees in Restaurant & Hotel Management and Public Relations/Interpersonal Communications from Purdue University.

Awards and Honors
Who's Who Worldwide,Who's Who of American Women, Distinguished Darden Professor (Purdue University).

Past/Present Clients
World Bank, United Nations,US Dept. of State, US. Dept. of the Army, Pentagon, Barclays Global Investors,Accenture,Fox News, MSNBC, CNN, The White House, Dept. of State, AT&T,Bank of America,American Association of Clinical Pharmacies,Ritz Carlton Hotels, Hilton Hotels, Marriott Hotels,Starwood Hotels,and many more.

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