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Social Etiquette and Good Manners/Questions

SubjectDate AskedExpert
60th Wedding Anniversary2/8/2012Jay Remer
  Q: I want to place a 60th wedding anniversary announcement in the newspaper for my parents. One ...
  A: Include the names of all grandchildren or the total number. The fact that one grandchild is deceased ...
Party Gifts2/5/2012Jay Remer
  Q: One of my neighbors had a party at her house. Assuming this was like one of our community cookouts, ...
  A: If you are invited to someone's house for a party, assume they will provide the food. If the ...
meeting daughter's boyfriends parents2/4/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: We our visiting our daughter who lives out of state. We have not yet met her boyfriend's parents ...
  A: You should always extend your own invitations, not through your daughter. Call (no email or texting ...
I am so rude. How to recover?2/4/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: While at my daughters ballet class, I was talking to a mom sitting next to me. She is from Europe ...
  A: If I were you I wouldn't say anything to the pajama mom. Wearing pajamas in public is still not ...
Who should give a baby shower?2/1/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My son's wife's mother informed me that the immediate family does not do the baby shower. I thought ...
  A: Brides and Expectant Mothers should be given a shower for their first wedding and baby only. The ...
Table settings1/29/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: Can you use a table cloth, placemat and charger?
  A: You can use a charger with either a tablecloth or placemat or both. Using a tablecloth and placemat ...
parents1/25/2012Jay Remer
  Q: My parents are in their seventies and have been married to each other for over 50 years. When we ...
  A: Please excuse my tardy response. I am on the road and easily distracted. You have a big issue ...
2 weeks to live1/25/2012Suzanne Zazulak Pedro
  Q: A former employee has recently been diagnosed with lung cancer and given two weeks to live. What is ...
  A: I am sorry to hear about your colleague's critical condition. You did mention former employee, ...
Male friend constantly visiting1/21/2012Jay Remer
  Q: My mom who is 79 years old and widowed since 2004 has lots of friends. There is one person who ...
  A: This man does sound lonely and I'm sure he enjoys your mother's company. However, he is being ...
Book of Remembrance1/19/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: Is there an etiquette about how to phrase an entry in a book of remembrance in regard to roles. My ...
  A: You may include any of the deceased's biographical information that you wish. Even if she ...
Amanda Gamble, HSC course1/18/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My name is Sara and i am a current year 12 student. As part of my subjects for 2012 i have chosen ...
  A: What an interesting topic! I think your best bet would be to create a series of questions that would ...
Grave Headstone1/18/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: Why is the mans name,when married,always on the left and the wife's name is on the right? I have 3 ...
  A: Please know how sorry I am for your loss. There is no hard and fast rule about the order of ...
interrupt1/16/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: is it ever correct to interrupt someone as they are speaking?
  A: Absolutely. Courtesy demands that you yell out a warning about an avalanche, no matter how badly it ...
food1/16/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: Recently a new friend was at our home. For desert we offered small handmade choclate treats. Our new ...
  A: You certainly may send or give him more if you wish,but it is not necessary. ...
Sympathy Flowers to home or funeral home1/14/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My sister,s Mother-in-Law, whom I have never met, passed away. I would like to send flowers to the ...
  A: It is absolutely appropriate to send flowers for the service of someone whom you have never met. All ...
Social Introductions of New Wife1/13/2012Constance Hoffman
  Q: My husband and I have been married about a year and a half. He has a son who is a senior in high ...
  A: Absolutely introduce yourself. Allow a break in the flow of the conversation, reach out your hand, ...
dont know1/8/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: this man that is a brother to my hair dresser , came to my work and brought me flowers.. I'm single ...
  A: If you like this man and want to see him socially again, call him and thank him for the flowers and ...
wedding attire1/7/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My son will be getting married in October. It will be a black tie optional evening wedding. The ...
  A: The bride is absolutely correct. You may,in good conscience, wear the gown length of your choice. As ...
Mom's 80th Birthday1/7/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: My husband and I have been going back with forth with it and still disagree with each other. Mom's ...
  A: Most people want to celebrate their special birthdays on their birthdays. Your Mom will probably ...
gift giving to children1/7/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My son and his wife sent his nephews cards with money for Christmas. One nephew is 12 the other is ...
  A: No,it was not wrong to tell your son the consequences of his actions. Much depends,of course on how ...
gift giving and receiving1/7/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My son and his daughter gave me a scarf for Christmas this year and did not get my husband of 30 ...
  A: How odd. Yes,if the family only had a certain amount to spend on gifts,a present that could be used ...
wedding gift for co-worker1/6/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: A co-worker is getting married (for the third time). None of the staff has been invited to the ...
  A: If you are not attending the wedding or a member of the family, you are in no way obligated to give ...
etiquette1/3/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: A lady whom I know called me on Saturday and invited me to lunch at her house the following ...
  A: I am afraid your daughter is correct. It was rude to suggest having the lunch at your house instead ...
family holiday visit1/2/2012Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: My adult niece came for a 2 week Christmas visit and stayed with her Dad, my brother, who happens to ...
  A: I'm sorry that your niece chose not to share some of her time with you during her recent visit. Any ...
wording on invitation1/1/2012Amanda Gamble
  Q: My husband is being honored by a group. He is being inducted into their hall of fame. We would ...
  A: Am I right to assume that you will only be invite a few people? If yes,a handwritten note to each ...
Car borrowing12/29/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: My aunt texted me asking if my cousin and his wife could borrow my car for a week, while they were ...
  A: Please allow me to clarify your question. You are asking if you should say something to your cousin ...
guest in your home12/25/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: What is the proper etiqutte for guest (my significant others family of whom I'm just getting to ...
  A: I believe you are asking whether your significant other's family is planning to stay in your home ...
Birthday gifts for adult12/24/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: With my 60th birthday approaching, I would like to ask adult friends and family who live out of ...
  A: No one is never to assume that anyone is going to give then a present,so it is not appropriate to ...
Witnessing Friend's Parental Discipline12/24/2011Suzanne Zazulak Pedro
  Q: My question has to do with parental discipline, specifically witnessing a friend using physical ...
  A: I do apologize for the slight holiday delay, but in regard to your question about parental ...
debutante ball12/23/2011Constance Hoffman
  Q: I am a 17 year old girl and one of my Guy friends asked me to be his date for his sisters debutante ...
  A: It'll be better to be overdressed than under dressed at a deb ball, especially as you know that the ...
Family party etiquette12/20/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: Gamble, My niece and her husband had a baby daughter three years ago.They live in the next town ...
  A: All parties have a beginning and an end time,even if it is not expressly stated. It sounds as if the ...
Etching on a gift12/15/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: I am giving my boss a special bottle of bourbon. Is it acceptable to put the following etched on ...
  A: Unless you work in a very small office where he normal boundaries between boss/employee are ...
Graduation etiquette12/14/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I am graduating this spring from graduate school. Should I send a graduation announcement to the ...
  A: Congratulations on your upcoming graduation! Announcements for graduation are normally reserved for ...
Guests12/13/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: Let me preface that my husband is a very generous man. For years I have entertained his friends and ...
  A: I am on your wavelength of thinking regarding taking a hiatus from hosting large gatherings. I ...
Christmas card12/10/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: My husband died suddenly/unexpectedly 4 months ago. How do I acknowledge Christmas cards received ...
  A: I am so sorry for your loss. If you would like the senders of the Christmas cards which bear both ...
Announcements12/10/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: My son is getting married next Saturday in a small private ceremony by a Justice of the Peace. They ...
  A: An announcement is merely news for people who might be interested in learning it. So,as soon as the ...
signing christmas card12/7/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: I am divorced 5 years and still communicate with my x's family. My children are in their 20's ...
  A: The children now living on their own shouldn't be included in the signature for the card. It is fine ...
Christmas Card Etiquette12/6/2011Amanda Gamble
  Q: My father passed away on November 16. I want to include pictures on my Christmas card with him and ...
  A: Please know how sorry I am for your loss. As it was such a recent event,of course you are not in a ...
party etiquette with dietary needs12/6/2011Constance Hoffman
  Q: What do you do if you are going to a relatives house for Christmas and you will not be able to eat ...
  A: I assume the relative is distant if they are not already aware of the dietary needs. Non-related ...
Single Sibling vs. Married Sibling with Kids & Parental Gift Giving12/6/2011Cynthia W. Lett
  Q: I NEED ADVICE!!! I am married with 3 kids and my sister is single with no kids. Every year there ...
  A: Your question is a common one that I receive at this time of year so please forgive me for sounding ...

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Social Etiquette and Good Manners

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Amanda Gamble

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Expertise

I will answer any etiquette question you`d care to ask! I will be happy to give friendly non-judgmental advice on any situation. Certain cultures and religions that outside of my personal scope of knowledge but I usually know whom to ask when I have a question. Time specific questions may or may not get answered by your deadline.

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I have been writing a daily etiquette advice column for 12 years. I have taught as well as given lectures on the subject.

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Life and other institutions.

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