AboutAmanda Gamble Expertise I will answer any etiquette question you`d care to ask!
I will be happy to give friendly non-judgmental advice on any situation.
If your question is rude,incoherent or demands I confirm your "victim" story,
I reserve the right to refuse to answer. Life is too short.
Certain cultures and customs are not part of my personal
experience,but I will research to get the needed answer.
Experience I have been writing a daily etiquette advice column for 6 years.
I have taught as well as given lectures on the subject.
Expert: Amanda Gamble Date: 7/21/2008 Subject: Etiquette for death of daughter's friends Father
Question The father of my 11 year old daughter's friend, whose parents were recently divorced (NOT amicably), died suddenly. The ex-wife will now get full custody of the friend. Is there proper etiquette for condolences to my daughter's friend and NOT the ex-wife? or do you just go through the motions for the child's sake?
Answer Dear Paul,
Direct your flowers or notes of condolence to the child. She has
suffered terribly with this divorce and now to lose her father,
it's a terrible situation. She may not know what to do or say in
response to these gestures,but they still should be made.
I hope you and your daughter will each write a note to her. A few
lines are enough:
Dear Amy,
Mrs. Jones and I were so sorry to hear about your father. He
was always very friendly to us and we enjoyed seeing him at your
soccer games.
We will always remember how much he loved to take you sledding
in the winter.
With deepest sympathy,
Paul and Jane Jones
She will like knowing that someone will remember him and has
a nice memory of him. Let your daughter do the same and don't worry
too much about form. She should write what she feels,it will mean
a good deal to her friend.